The Alaska Department of Law – ‘That Way Madness Lies”
Let me start by saying I am only capable of writing this post, because I have finally stopped laughing. I’m not talking “LOL” or amusement, or even an actual out loud chuckle. I’m talking inability to speak, tears streaming down face, convulsions, and inability to breathe. There’s no catchy acronym for that, like “LOL,” because first, it seldom happens, and second, the acronym would be “ITSTSDFCAITB”. Not catchy.
Perhaps it is because in college I studied not only Early English Drama, but also Psychology, that this little bit of absurdity feels as though it was created by the gods of humor just for me. But truly, I have not laughed this hard in years. If laughter is the best medicine, then I have officially overdosed today.
What has done this to me? What has caused me to be the victim of multiple spasmodic aftershocks of laughter since early this morning? The unlikely answer, my friends, is the State of Alaska Department of Law Annual Report 2008.
Gryphen at The Immoral Minority has done a great write-up on this (click the link and scroll down), complete with translations and humorous asides.
Colberg, in the introductory letter for this official document, references Shakespeare’s Henry V, and his famous “St. Crispian’s Day” monologue. And it’s not just a passing mention. OK…remember. Department of Law, Annual Report, first page, letter from the Attorney General. If you feel like it, you can imagine him reading the letter aloud at a podium, addressing the rest of the Department of Law and whoever else happens to be around. It adds to the effect. OK, OK. Lights, camera, ACTION!
December 2008
Dear Governor Palin, Alaska Legislators and Fellow Alaskans,
Shakespeare, in the play Henry V provides the ultimate team-building speech for King Henry in what is now known as the “St. Crispin’s Day” speech. The real King Henry V may or may not have given a rousing speech to his outnumbered army on the eve of the Battle of Agincourt in 1215, but as with so much, fact has become conflated with myth —and the result is inspiration. I think we have an inspiring story to tell, based largely on facts.
(Interruption by AKM: Please note the story is based “largely” on facts. The rest, I’m guessing, is based on complete fabrication? Fast forward to the end of the page…)
[snip] As Henry said in his speech, “The fewer men [Shakespeare did not go out of his way to anticipate the advancement of women], the greater share of honour.” Tell that to the Collections Section—that it is a greater honor because you have fewer colleagues? The point is, that the Department of Law does a lot and does it honorably and can be proud of it.
Henry called on his team to look to the future:
“He that outlives this day, and comes safe home
Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam’d,
And rouse him at the name of Crispian.
He that shall live this day, and see old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbors
And say, ‘Tomorrow is Saint Crispian.’”
Well, maybe the staff at the Department of Law will not commemorate their service to the state with a yearly vigil and declare, “I was there when…” but they have reason to.In his conclusion, Henry declares:
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers [and sisters]
For he today that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne’er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in England now a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs’d they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin’s day.
Brought into a modern Alaskan translation, “Those poor attorneys who have never known the privilege of standing in the ranks of the Department of Law during the Fiftieth Year of Statehood will think themselves accursed.”We (relatively) few. We happy few.
Sincerely,
Talis J. Colberg
Attorney General
Shedding blood? Holding manhood cheap? Standing a-tiptoe? The Battle of Agincourt in 1215? Attorneys who were not in the Department of Law in the Palin administration, and up to their eyeballs in Troopergate, subpoena-gate, and working over the State Constitution with a pair of legal brass knuckles “will think themselves accursed“???
I love Shakespeare. I really do. I have three (yes three) copies of The Complete Works of Shakespeare in my home. I have seen Henry V many many times. There’s nothing wrong with a line of Shakespeare now and then. But this is waaaay over the top. The first rule of Toastmasters is “Know Your Audience.” And unless Talis Colberg wrote this just for me, he is wildly off the mark. To anyone else, he may as well be wearing a sign that says, “Hi, I’m a delusional, pompous windbag and I’d like you to make fun of me.”
There have been many times I have thought to myself, “I wonder what is going on inside Talis Colberg’s head?” But, I NEVER expected it would be this:
This is how he sees the Alaska Department of Law.
I can forgive a lot. But I will never forgive Talis Colberg for this. Because now, every time I am in his presence, I will be picturing him in a purple velvet tunic, metal pants and a codpiece.
He has proven one thing, though. For Palin and her administration, “all the world’s a stage.”
When is this play going to be over?
AKM, I bow down before you.
Hysterical write-up–even funnier than the letter, though that of course was unwittingly witty.
I I I c cc can’t bb breeeeaaattthhhh. gulp shnort churrgglle
ITSTSDFCAITB He is a codpiece.
I am soooooooo happy that bloggers — anonymous & not — have finally gotten around to mocking this as it deserves. I so wish that KO or some other widely-read/heard/viewed person would read this out in its entirety. I would love love love for the whole entire world to see that this is the sort of guy that our gov hand-picked & coddles & protects so that he could/can serve her own interests over that of Alaska.
Perhaps TC should be kicked out of the attorney world based solely on this? I think it’s justifiable. Insanity is reason to strip him of his license right, even though they’ve managed to overlook his little subpoena malfeasance (is that the correct term, Quince?) thingy, also?
And thanks a lot AKM — I’d managed to read this several times (for entertainment purposes) without the codpiece & purple velvet image in my head, but now it’s there. The horror!
Wow, ROFLMAO-this one works pretty good-Rolling on floor laughing my ass off, gee thanks for the visual AKM
Anyone besides me see parallels between this piece and Blago’s bizarre Tennyson speech? Almost as if those two college roomies were smoking weed & sitting around and discussing the classics together & this is what they were able to get out of it? What a waste of all of that money on their respective college tuitions…
Just be careful if there is a guy with a longbow and wearing chain mail skulking around in the bushes by your house. He might not be just a moose hunter.
is that sir lawrence in said codpiece ?
None other, m’lady. AKM
I am thankful for one thing – that you did not choose the Kenneth Branaugh “Henry V” monologue – that would have RUINED my day to have TC the Codpiece forever linked to “we few, we happy few, we band of brothers”. God, I am so pissed at TC’s attempt to hijack that speech that I can barely type! Arrgggghhhh! Lemme at ‘im!
His old school roommate, Governor Blago, is forever issuing forth inappropriate quotations also. Was there something in the air in their room that permanently altered a section of their noggins? To add my own little Shakespeare to this thought, this truly is “the winter of our discontent.”
Oh God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!
- Shakespeare
Aussie Blue SkyNo Gravatar (16:02:36) :
Oh God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!
- Shakespeare
———-
LOL, good one.
Methinks his organ of cogitation is small enough to fit his codpiece….
SMR – yup – Talis and Blago sure as shit were not studying law while they were roomies in law school !! They can catch up in the “real” college……U of Big House…….
Maybe it’s their secret code…………bless their hearts.
I guess this play will be over when Alaskans, say “enough”. Reminds me of that captain in “Dances with Wolves”, the one who assigns Lt. Dunbar, to that far flung outpost. He writes out the assignment and then folds it into a size that resembles a Cheese-its”. He then stands up and declares, “Im pissing my pants”. I can see TC standing in front of the Dept. of Law, and making just such an announcement.
SMR–”subpoena malfeasance thingy” is definitely the terminology of choice, and even spelled correctly (a rarity among lawyers and royals, also, too)! But don’t lose hope….professional conduct complaints to bar licensing folks are confidential (until the point of public discipline), and can take quite awhile.
Oh, I would lay big bucks on a bet that former AG (current Juneau mayor) Bruce Botelho’s annual reports’ intros weren’t nearly so sidesplittingly funny!
Oddly enough, I was just trying to convince my girlfriend last night that she should start trying to sneak in (in the most Ladies Man, hipster-doofus, Couvasier-swilling voice possible), “All the world’s a stage, baby,” into more conversations.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Ladies_Man_(2000_film)
If Mr. Colberg was trying to jam the bard down his audience’s collective throat with a bathroom plunger, I can only think two things:
1) It was the AG equivalent of the Elephant Man’s garbled “I am not an animal!” and
2) It was also equivalent to a toddler’s plaintive, “I’m *not* dumb, I’m smart!”
Perhaps he should scrap alluding to Henry and concentrate on the deformed Richard III.
OK, here is what you could say: “ROFLMAOPIMP!” – “Rolling On the Floor Laughing My A$$ Off Pi$$ing In My Pants!”
I sent Colberg’s literary masterpiece to the Attorney-General’s office in Connecticut. It’s groundbreaking stuff and sets a new benchmark for Attorneys-General everywhere.
Hmmmm,
“The First thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers.”
Dick the Butcher, Shakespeare, Henry VI
Or was that SWWNBN that said that?
WurzelhexliNo Gravatar
The PIMP part’s really appropriate.
Aussie Blue SkyNo Gravatar (16:19:20) :
I sent Colberg’s literary masterpiece to the Attorney-General’s office in Connecticut. It’s groundbreaking stuff and sets a new benchmark for Attorneys-General everywhere.
——–
Oooh…I’m thinking the AG in Georgia needs to see this too, also.
The sweeping romanticism ( similar to the Musketeer’s”One For All and All For One” ) of this passage gives more credence to the suspicion that Sir Talis Codpiece fell gallantly on his sword for his Queen last September when he advised the loyal servants of the Queen to ignore the subpoenas.
Yeppers….he’s cracked.
Hey, lets go right to the top on AG’s. Send it to Eric Holder USAG.
I vote that, should someone send an op-ed piece to ADN about this, they should entitle it, “Hold Their Manhoods Cheap”.
For my part, I shall start referring to Mr. Colberg as “Crispy” from now on.
“…but as with so much, fact has become conflated with myth —and the result is inspiration.”
Does this mean AG Codpiece has mixed a sprinkling of meager facts with lots of fantasy, and thinks he’s done a jolly good job this year?! So, did the remaining DOL employees stampede for the exit, readying a resume to send anywhere-
Where is the smiley smacking it’s head on the wall- I need to copy it here. Perhaps AG Holder needs a copy of this inspirational introduction…
Lee323(16:25:15) :
The sweeping romanticism ( similar to the Musketeer’s”One For All and All For One” ) of this passage gives more credence to the suspicion that Sir Talis Codpiece fell gallantly on his sword for his Queen last September when he advised the loyal servants of the Queen to ignore the subpoenas.
Yeppers….he’s cracked.
____________________________________
Couldn’t have said it any better…LOL!
Actually, you know what else this reminds me of? High school speeches that started out “Webster’s dictionary defines [term I'm about to drone on about] as…”
AG Holder’s office already has it.
Hey there Muckracker…….Does your blog insurance cover the broken ribs it causes?
I would like to sue. I was safe until I started to watch the video, then you are forced to meld together the 2 scenarios.
A little bird told me that, John Cleese and the rest of the circus are seething with envy, or perhaps it was Black Adder.
A little black haie dye and it would be Colberg doing Aitkens, doing Mr. Bean, doing the Black Adder.
There exists somewhere audio of Peter Sellers doing Laurence Olivier doing Richard III doing the lyrics of Hard Days Night. I heard it in college. I’d give my right arm, or a Mudflats t-shirt to anyone who can come up with it.
AKM
“….but as with so much, fact has become conflated with myth —and the result is inspiration.”
I predict this statement will be the new motto for SarahPAC.
……especially those facts that are mythically conflated. Inspiration? Not so much.
I kinda had that reaction reading about SP….More gobblydegook from the head of the Administration from the ADN:
Q. How are you juggling (national expectations with being governor)?
A. “It’s not a tough thing to juggle when I know and am grounded in the fact that I’m Alaska’s governor, that is first and foremost … I do receive, our office receives, hundreds if not thousands of requests to either speak or participate in something. We turn them down for the most part we say no, I’m not going to leave Alaska or I’ll rarely travel outside of Alaska. “Now a lot of people outside of Alaska don’t really understand the way that we operate up here. I’m reminded quite often and my administration is reminded often, well, every other governor travels around the nation. Look at what Arnold Schwarzenegger, for instance, is doing right now, he and (Pennsylvania Gov. Edward) Rendell and others who are traveling around the nation as proponents of their infrastructure package.
“And I say that, well, Alaska is a little bit different. We’re and I say this with all due respect, we’re a little bit more parochial here, which is good, it keeps you grounded. We want to make sure that our elected officials are serving the people who literally have elected them.”
Q. There’s been some reports you are getting a book deal, whether it be $11 million, $4 million?
A. “I heard that! I can’t wait to see that! No, I haven’t seen that. If there were an opportunity in the future to, again, do something to promote Alaska, I will do it. But I will only do it if it’s in Alaska’s best interest and it doesn’t harm my family.”
Q. But at this point, that’s not something you are pursuing? You don’t have a publisher or an agent lined up?
A. “I don’t have a publisher but I will let you know if ever there is an offer. But that $11 million figure that I read about also is laughable. That’s out of anybody’s realm of possibility of consideration.”
There was a comment (I think on the ‘Flats, IM or Diva’s Blue Oasis) about passing gas in the wind and spinning it into Shakespeare…
OMG- do you think AG Codpiece got his speeches mixed up, and he’s really trying out for Spamalot? Just askin’…
Holy Crap! How over Sarah’s head must this be?
I can just see her Googling furiously “battle of Again Court” no hits there, hmm, best go back and read what Talis said so can copy and paste….Wow, good thing it’s not really “Again Court” ’cause that would be BAD!
OK, copy Agincourt, paste into Google, read entries….It’s those French People again, trying to make me look STOOPID. DAMN YOU SARKOSY AND YOUR FELLOW FRENCH PEOPLE. Why does this French stuff have to keep coming up to haunt me….
love Sarah
> CO almost nativeNo Gravatar (16:52:56) :
> OMG- do you think AG Codpiece got his speeches mixed up, and he’s really > trying out for Spamalot? Just askin’…
Maybe for the position of “Third Bruce.” All together now:
“EEEEEEEEE-manuel Kant was a real pissant who was very rarely stable,
Heidigger-Heidigger was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table….”
In a previous post that suggested looking at the flowered cover of Talis Colberg’s Annual Report, I looked and read the letter. Even with a passing acquaintance (don’t we all) with Shakespeare I was baffled at what point he was attempting to make.
Thanks for ‘splaining that he had none.
South Side Chicago
And just think,in your earlier poll, my former governor, Rod Blogojevich, beat out your current governator-from-hell AND Cheney & the the befuddled-thank-God-he’s gone baby Bush (hope that Jed Bush is not really interested in running outside of his ‘create a shadow government’ to save the US from President Obama spiel).
Oops–Jeb Bush
ROTFLMAOPMP (ROLLING ON THE FLOOR, LAUGHING MY A$$ OFF, PEEING MY PANTS) is my favorite.
Wow. WTG Colberg… uh, I mean Shakspeare
Is this the written equivalent of a huge corsage?
I finally received a response from Rep. Beth Kertulla this morning re: Palin & Tolberg’s behavior in Troopergate. Needless to say, Rep. Kertulla is quite concerned as well. I responded a bit out of fun :
“Dear Aurora,
Thank you for the response! I can only imagine how much email Rep. Kertulla gets. And I hope it’s all from constituents and about issues, and not a lot of weirdo stuff from Sarah Palin fans.
I did read the article at http://juneauempire.com/stories/012909/loc_382695759.shtml and have been following closely, thank you! This story just gets more strange with each passing day – I wouldn’t trust this AG if my life depended on it. Smoke and mirrors: The bottom line is, whatever the outcome, is that if Colberg is not penalized or censured in some way for this I think a lot of Alaskans will have no qualms about doing questionable things, and I for one, would probably just skip jury duty since I don’t really have to follow the law, do I? It’s absolutely a good idea that Alaska move to voting in an AG. Too many corrupt governors in a row! Can we just impeach Colberg, and vote in Branchflower, please??? I know…wishful thinking.
Best of wishes for a busy and productive session!
OMG – I did it again! Colberg not Tolberg. I’ve put my dunce hat on and am sitting on a stool in the corner for ten minutes.
I blame Blogojevich and his english lit references!
Has TC been drinking Blago’s KoolAid? Let’s see, they’re in their fifties, went to law school in Cali, hmm, methinks they’ve both been having acid flashbacks lately. It’s the only thing that fits.
On a more practical note, why isn’t the AG of Alaska elected? I don’t how all states are set up constitutionally, but all the ones I know of have the AG as an elected position. Time for some “change?”
I don’t know what is worse, Blago quoting Tennyson and Kipling, or Colberg quoting Shakespeare. I’m picturing roommates comparing Cliffs notes before English Lit classes. Given that Friday night is beer and wine night at my house, I really don’t care at this point. Fugemall.
I’m just thankful that I gave up being an English major in college many years ago. I’m sure that English Lit majors across the globe are suffering aneurisms. Oh, hell, cheers, TGIF, IDC.
Wonder if the 2 wanna be thespians were in a drama club or frat together ?? Yearbooks are always fun to look at………..
In the immortal words of my fifteen year old neighbor buddy…oh…my…god…
Growing up in PA, we had a state representative who fancied himself a Civil War Hero and spent many an hour doing re-enactments (he was about 5’2″ and 130 pounds and a face like a twelve-year-old and I always assumed he was the drummer boy). Much hilarity about this over the years…
Your illustrious AG has beat him dead in the water.
You all really are bigger than life, aren’t you? I never realized that Northern Exposure was a documentary…this is Maurice-worthy…
Oh — and VoteNov 4? Your question as to whether this was the equivalent of a huge corsage darn near trashed my keyboard. Serious spit take.
Brilliant satire AKM and extremely timely quote, Aussi blue sky. *bowing*
Slightly OT – but for folks planning to inform Rush Limbaugh’s advertising sponsors that they will be boycotted. . . I noticed that Red Lobster restaurants (corporate office in Orlando) appears on that list. (to borrow a page from AG Codpiece): hear ye! Hear ye!
Let it forthwith be known to all – Red Lobster Restaurants doth align itself most readily with the fiefdoms of Olive Garden, LongHorn Steakhouse, The Capital Grille, Bahama Breeze and Seasons 52 and they do march together under the banner of Darden Restaurant Group – http://www.darden.com/ – And so my fellows, we who sally forth and sully not, address your reprimands forthwith to those who hold court with doomsdayers and so on….(okay, that’s enough of that) The gist of the garble is that Darden controls their own advertising – and they have a HUGE pocket to be boycotted since they are literally coast to coast to coast (Atlantic, Pacific, and Gulf)
Mudpuppie Wannabe
I can see it all now…some parts of MA were the same, but without the damping creativity and religious, partriotic, ferver. I spent some time in both places.
Very good to know, Greytdog. Learn something every day.
lol GreyTdog, their food sucks anyway. Anybody eaten those biscuits that Red Lobster serves? Gross. I worked at Olive Garden for a short period of time. Couldn’t handle them making the staff sing happy songs in the back before serving. In Arizona they paid servers $3.13 per hour (right to work state, f*** them). All extremely sucky corporate ripoffs.
Shouldn’t this sufficient evidence to have him impeached…or at least committed?
This seems to be the case precedent that Colberg is using re: questioning the validity of the Legislative committee’s subpoenas. I am trying to find the case. Senator Kertulla is Rep. Beth Kertulla’s father and was an excellent Senator.
https://www.officeofvictimsrights.legis.state.ak.us/ovrdocuments/2006_ANNUAL_REPORT.pdf
In another case, Kerttula v. Abood, a witness was subpoenaed to appear at a
deposition in a civil case. The witness, Senator Kerttula, was not a party to the civil
action. He moved to quash the subpoena asserting legislative immunity. After the
motion was denied, Senator Kerttula sought appellate relief. The Supreme Court ruled that Senator Kerttula could file an original application for relief challenging the trial court’s order denying the motion to quash his subpoena. The court also held that Senator Kerttula had standing to assert the privilege even though he was not a party in the underlying action.
Kerttula v. Abood, 686 P.2d 1197, 1201 (Alaska 1984).
While I was idly surfing (not chancing upon a happy snap of Talis Colberg in tights), I happened upon this potted history:
http://www.alaskadispatch.com/tundra-talk/1-talk-of-the-tundra/147-alaska-ags-ill-fated-experiment-with-public-service-in-wake-of-troopergate.html
GreytdogNo Gravatar (18:36:17) :
Slightly OT – but for folks planning to inform Rush Limbaugh’s advertising sponsors that they will be boycotted. . . I noticed that Red Lobster restaurants (corporate office in Orlando) appears on that list. (to borrow a page from AG Codpiece): hear ye! Hear ye!
Let it forthwith be known to all – Red Lobster Restaurants doth align itself most readily with the fiefdoms of Olive Garden, LongHorn Steakhouse, The Capital Grille, Bahama Breeze and Seasons 52 and they do march together under the banner of Darden Restaurant Group – http://www.darden.com/ – And so my fellows, we who sally forth and sully not, address your reprimands forthwith to those who hold court with doomsdayers and so on….(okay, that’s enough of that) The gist of the garble is that Darden controls their own advertising – and they have a HUGE pocket to be boycotted since they are literally coast to coast to coast (Atlantic, Pacific, and Gulf)
————
Wow. And here’s a little more of that story for you. Darden Restaurant Group started out, 50 or more years ago as the “Green Frog Restaurant” in Waycross, GA. I grew up in that town, knew those folks, and ate there many times. Big Bill and his sons, Bill, Jett, and Matt. They were members of First Baptist – the church I was raised in. Bill and Jett were older by a few years, Matt a year younger. Bill and Matt dark haired – Jett a red head. After the Green Frog, they also owned the Duck Inn in Orlando. Golden boys they thought they were.
I live in interesting times. Who would’ve ever thought that people I knew then, would be mentioned here?
Knowing them growing up, I’m not the least bit surprised that they’re ‘that idiot’s supporters’, bless their hearts.
Sorry for the ramble – that took me back.
All I can say is that it bogles the mind. Do they really think this retoric makes it all OK? I think we have an inspiring story to tell, based largely on facts.
It is funny, but If I didn’t laugh, I would cry.
I hope you are successful in getting the representation you need, by electing your next AG.
Hell, I’m 53 so if Bill started the Green Frog in 1937, well, y’all can do the math.
I’ve also gotta say, I remember their Momma as being a sweet, classy lady.
Tallis and Blago– The Krispie Kreme Band of Brothers!
Can we do another fundraiser to hire John Cleese to read the report aloud?
Tallis– if you read this, you are such a loser! Everyone’s laughing at you, dude.
OT – Blogger Andrew Sullivan from “The Atlantic” spoke at a college last night.
In the Q&A section, Sullivan made some powerful and biting comments about Sarah Palin’s candidacy for Vice President. He accused her of being “incapable of telling the truth consistently,” or answering basic questions, or governing in a transparent, accountable manner. Sullivan labeled her a “farce” and a “joke” – someone who had “no business” being the Governor of Alaska, let alone Vice President or God forbid, President. Sullivan went on, concluding that any party that nominates someone like her is “not a serious political party, and will lose, and will keep losing, and will deserve to lose.”
For the record, Sullivan is a Conservative.
Maybe he just wants to make sure everyone knows he’s not a high school dropout.
wired differently (20:20:00) :
Can we do another fundraiser to hire John Cleese to read the report aloud?
———————————————————–
You people would have so much fun. The reading of the report, Blago’s Tennyson speech, and then there is so much to choose from Sarah’s repertoire.
Boy could you raise a lot of money!
From Shakespeare in the Courts To Shakespeare in Prison [let's hope].
Hey do you think they old law school room mates ‘could’ end up as cell mates?
To me, our good AG will from now on be Talis Codpiece!
My Gawd, you can’t make this stuff up! I hope Olbermann or Maddow gits ahold of this whimsy!
There is no shortage of outrage at the transparent partisanship in Talis Colberg’s legal advice to the Palin aides. People are rightfully put off by his advice that they could choose to ignore a legislative subpeona. However, I think the real outrage should be directed to a much more basic issue. Talis Colberg is Attorney General for the State of Alaska. He and his department are not attorneys for individual Alaskans. He is most certainly not the attorney for Sarah Palin. By giving legal advice to individuals who were engaged in a dispute with the State of Alaska, he committed a most basic conflict of interest. No matter what his advice may have been, Colberg cannot take a position that potentially conflicts with the Legislature. He could recuse himself, but he cannot join in a cause against his own client. This is so basic a concept of law that his choice to ignore should be grounds for disbarment.
OT — but we all need a nice good feeling:
http://www.oneeyedparrot.org/obama.html
Hath ye but to ask, yet that, shall ye receive.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLongUBPm5Y
AKM, enjoy.
OMG! I heart you Big Slick!!! You made my day. I’d never seen it, only heard the audio! Send me a pm on the forum and the t-shirt is yours! Huzzah!
AKM
And Peter Sellers looks so young!
I know Talis as a friend of a friend, and while I don’t know what he was thinking with those subpoenas, I do know better than to doubt his sense of humor. AKM, your joke that he was writing this for your enjoyment may not be too far off the mark.
Personally, I’m looking forward to hearing what stories Talis has to tell someday when he’s in a position to speak freely about life in the Palin administration (whether he threw himself under the Sarah bus out of misplaced loyalty, or whether she pushed him). Until then, keep an ear out for satire, and keep in mind when you’re laughing at him that he may be laughing with you. I may be wrong, but I wouldn’t put it past him.
I’m speechless, ROFLMBFAO
Grandma Nancy (22:49:30) :
OT — but we all need a nice good feeling:
http://www.oneeyedparrot.org/obama.html
——
This made my day! I love the fun things shared on this site!
And you know he had to have run this speech by SOMEONE…his wife, his assistant…makes one wonder.
((And if he didn’t–they had to be completely stunned.))
Not speech, I meant to say report.
And I also forgot to thank you for the VIVID imagery. I think that’s where I got “speech” from. The codpiece is front and center in my mind forever.
Can Michael Steele lead GOP out of woods? Republican National Committee picks first black chair
NY Daily News article
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2009/01/30/2009-01-30_can_michael_steele_lead_gop_out_of_woods.html
No word on where SP finished in the voting – maybe that’s why she didn’t want to attend (or wasn’t invited). The REAL Republicans know how inept she is.
Many of comments with this article are frequently bringing up the word “tokenism”.
This was one of the better ones:
Luckily for Mr. Steele, the outsider, it is impossible to destroy what has already been reduced to rubble and outright desperation (McCain/Palin). All of that not withstanding lets let out a bronx cheer for the way Bush has left the party, hip hip……………LOL your silence is deafening.
Apologies for being so “off-thread” but I don;t really care for (undertstand?) that forum thingy.
BTW, also as an ‘aside’ – Keith Olbermann turned the glorious age of 50 last Tuesday. A belated Happy Birthday Mr. Olbermann.
not a lot of weirdo stuff from Sarah Palin fans…………….LOL
Today ADN asked “Oh where, oh where, art thou Sarah Palin?”
Though she is said to be in the capital, like Palin herself, it is said that at the mansion -it appears the lights are off and nobodys home.
We few, we happy few, we muddpuppies
Blackadder series
Anybody remember when Baldrick says his father was an actor too. He played the codpiece….
Lest I forgeteth, Go Steelers!
Palin on MSNBC http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3036677/#28940894
Love that the D want these money grubbing CEOs to have to take a salary of 400K if they get bailout funds. I am wondering, though, how the R will turn this into a negative? I am sure they’ll find a way. Although I think a super majority of citizen would cheer it and say it’s about damned time.
Do you think Talis can see England when he looks out his window?
Seriously, this is so inappropriate for a state document.
I perused the document,32 pages with pictures!!!
No where did it mention Gov. Palin’s little problem nor did it mention the fact that your attorney general hinted to the Gov’s staff not to show up for the subpoenas.
Of course it told of all the success they had at putting all the real criminals away.
God help Alaska!!!!
Worth 4 minutes: Watch… http://www.colbertnation.com/home
i had posted this on the previous TC blog……. for the science guys in the crowd (i didn’t do so well in english lit)
In Stephen Jay Gould’s book The Richness of Life (page 278) — one can find the quote that was mined for the flower report. Interestingly enough the entire book is available online – just google it – i tried posting a link and got sent into 404 error land. but i digress
the title of the page that the quote was taken from is “The Power of the Modal Bacter, Or Why the Tail Can’t Wag the Dog”
but wait – it gets more interesting.
first, Gould is hands-down our generation’s most beloved evolutionist.
second, i think palin doesn’t go for that stuff, right?
third — the rest of the paragraph is full of wonderful little phrases like “grasping at straws” and “myopic focus on extreme values” and “false surrogate for progress”
(may gould forgive me for just yanking out those phrases out of context)
or that the next page in the book mentions Dana’s (Darwin’s contemporary) personal transformation from creationism to evolution
or that this particular chapter of the book is used to lay down the seven arguments that define Gould’s perception of how evolution occurs
hmmm. seven arguments…..seven mountains……one is logical and based on scientific inquiry — the other (to quote gould once again out of context but quite spot on) “the invalid elevation of a small and epiphenomenal consequence into a major and controlling cause” (ie., tail wagging the dog)
my head hurts.
TC quotes famous evolutionist to make a point with Palin? about law? or the exponential growth of the Department of Law….. is he trying to make a satirical jab at Cambrian explosion?
surely he didn’t think palin actually would recognize Gould’s name right?
i will post (but first make copy so if tubes eat lovely post i don’t have to recreate it again) and then go look for some sugar in the kitchen.
Please take a moment and think kind thoughts for all the souls who work in the Department of Law, especially the real attorneys.
I know a few- neighbors, friends of friends, co-workers of my mother’s time as an Assistant AG and so on.
One can no longer even ask the general ” How’s work going?” type questions of those folks without embaressing them.
If it gets brought up, conversations in the grocery market line or on the street become stilted and uncomfortable…You know, like when you are chatting with someone and trying not to yell OMG-what-are-you-going-to-do-about-that-huge-nasty-rash-??! and the other person is wishing they could wear a bag over their head til the rash passes.
Mr Colberg whether satirical , as one here thinks possible, or serious, has given the Department of Law a rash in public.
AP reporting this AM
Alaska lawmakers question Sarah’s focus
http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/P/PALIN_RETURNS?SITE=FLTAM&SECTION=US
Word’s leaking out.
I doubt Palin was interested in the RNC position. Too much work. She avoids work like the plague. And it is difficult to run for prez if you are the RNC chair. She needs to be free of such constraints. And her pathetic “who me?” responses to questions about her running in 2012 are just a pack of lies. Of course she is seriously considering it. She has burned too many bridges in Alaska, the senate is too constricting and too much work. It’s either run for prez or go to fox.
“We few, we happy few, we band of brothers”
The band of brothers/sisters would be the Governor and “her” trembling employees. Colberg is supposed to be on the other side-on the side of the law and the people of Alaska. He’s more of a coward than a hero, but definitely a very well educated moron.
“The law hath not been dead, though it hath slept” ……………………………. from Measure for Measure is closer to my sentiments right now.
AND Methinks our AG is Should peruse Henry IV pt II for some perspective on his struggle in Henry V. He thinks HE”S PRINCE HAL…not even close.
I’m now doomed to spending my Saturday figuring out which of my state’s officials are playing Falstaff
Moldy, Bullcalf, Feeble, Shadow and Wart.
And where oh where IS Prince Hal to purge us of this “paradise of thieves”?
and don’t get me started on Henry the VI
Lance the Boil aka Crust Scramble (06:54:22)
SP ‘striding around with TWO blackberries’, hhhmmmmmmmmmm!
Lance – I had to laugh……you used the words focus and Sarah in the sme sentence !! I’m adding Chris Matthews to my list of high bidders for the shoes. Yesterday he called SP “a comer”. He compared her to Bobby Kennedy as someone who was not very smart, but surrounded themselves with people who were and could “help” them.
UK LadyNo Gravatar (07:30:51) :
Lance the Boil aka Crust Scramble (06:54:22)
SP ’striding around with TWO blackberries’, hhhmmmmmmmmmm!
————–
Well, you know, there’s ‘official’ Alaska business and then there’s all that stuff she’s
gotta hide.
austintxNo Gravatar (07:33:59) :
Lance – I had to laugh……you used the words focus and Sarah in the sme sentence !! I’m adding Chris Matthews to my list of high bidders for the shoes. Yesterday he called SP “a comer”. He compared her to Bobby Kennedy as someone who was not very smart, but surrounded themselves with people who were and could “help” them.
*******************
The problem with that analysis is she surrounds herself with losers and enablers. She would never have someone around who isn’t obligated to her in some way. By definition that is someone not very smart. You can see that in the “former” Palin people who have spoken out.
Hick – “yes” people………..or fawning sycophants…..
Peter Sellers is on his way.
The Political Genius that is Colbert:
“Last night—last night’s party line vote was a great start for the 111th Congress. But these hard times demand an even larger meaningless gesture. That is why I am calling on every Republican who voted against this bill to put no money where your mouth is. Refuse to accept a single penny of the eight hundred billion dollars for your Congressional district.
Think of it—think of it—think of it like a hunger strike. Then—then just sit back and watch in glee as the Democrats face the wrath of their constituents suffering as the eight hundred billion dollars tears through their districts like a force five cash-o-cane.
It won’t be easy but you are fighting for a principle. If we can’t have a perfect bill to stimulate the economy you’d rather have no economy at all. And that’s the Word.”
I am going to email all the R in my state and ask them to do this. It’s be SO funny if they did. Imagine the D defeat in 20120/2012. How fun would that be?
She’s beginning to look kinda like those Naughty Monkey shoes, bless her heart.
Put no money where your mouth is.
Here’s what I am sending:
Refuse to accept a single penny of the eight hundred billion dollars.
It won’t be easy but you are fighting for a principle.
Just say no to bailout money!
Let those danged Democrats vote for the bill and help their voters out. Republican voters don’t need no danged jobs! Nor 401Ks! Nor college funds! Noper! We like to be economically void!
Ok I think I have been way over analyzing this and have come to conclusion that Colberg is calling out for help! Kind of a “Please impeach me and Release Me”! How Blagoesque of him.
I think that this forward written by him will be used in his application for his disability claim for PTSD he had developed in working for the Palin Administration.Actually Alaska I think you may soon but up to your eyeballs with budget breaking PTSD claims before it is all said and done.
Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!
ignore spelling errors! LOL The sad part was I actually proof read that before I posted. (Sigh)
Consider yourselves lucky that
he doth wear the pants of metal
despite his protests of too much
scrutiny by the public.
let it forever be remembered
that Sarah Palin was less qualified
to be a good candidate
than Geraldine Ferrarro
or Admiral Stockdale.
http://www.fredmalekblog.com/
Scroll down to where Fred Malek discusses his role in the McCain/Palin campaign. He says Sarah wasn’t his choice and was surprised when she was chosen. He later says she’s got a future in the Republican Party.
Do these veterans of past political campaigns see something in Sarah that they don’t see in Jindal and Huckabee?
Honestly, I’m shocked at how many seasoned campaign veterans are circling their Musk Oxen around Sarah. Is she really that hypnotic?
It’s okay, PCO of WA… I read very well your typo-ese.
much easier also to read than the listening to also of the palin-ese.
ATF – Freddie Malek is both a creeper and an idiot. He has the credibility of a Chuck Coulson.
Okay..been chewing on this for awhile and I’m just going to come out and say it.
This is downright WEIRD. I don’t know if Colberg penned this himself….but, methinks he at least read it and approved it and that spells unstable in my book. The man is mentally incapacitated. Living in his very own little world…
There I said IT! That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it!
Do these veterans of past political campaigns see something in Sarah that they don’t see in Jindal and Huckabee?
______________________
A skirt and a wink.
It is my understanding that those circling their wagons around blunderbrain are the far right Rep, mainly from the south. You know -the Bible belt, creation science, why can’t we still have slaves crowd.
The northern & more progressive Rep have totally ignored her.
If they pick extreme right wing Palin all the better, no moderate will vote for her, no matter what she does to improve her image too many people will never forget her horrific rallies -the closest this generation have gotten to a lynchmob. McCain may have gained 100,000 voters with her, but my guess is he lost millions of moderate votes because of her.
Let her pal around with the KKK a little longer.
Maybe you’ll get lucky and she’ll relocated to Georgia with her inbred followers.
Goalie – He’s kinda like Blago , isn’t he ?? They got ahold of some bad acid while they were roomies. What else could it be ??
Paula CochranNo Gravatar (09:32:30) :
Maybe you’ll get lucky and she’ll relocated to Georgia with her inbred followers.
——–
OK, Paula, I’ll be the first to say that we have our share of idiots here in Georgia, but please don’t tar all of us with the same brush. I might just take offense.
Alaska republicans will vote against the economic stimulus and then ask for a BIG chunk of it.. Our elected official are so rude here.. remember they are corrupt and let any and all us senators know Alaska needs stringent over sight off any funds received..
IT”S YOUR MONEY FOLKS CAN YOU REALLY TRUST THEM???
Guess who is AlterNet’s no.1 most loathesome person for 2008? They hit that nail right on the head!
http://www.alternet.org/story/123844/15_most_loathsome_people_of_2008/?page=entire
SMRNo Gravatar (10:00:33) :
Guess who is AlterNet’s no.1 most loathesome person for 2008? They hit that nail right on the head!
http://www.alternet.org/story/123844/15_most_loathsome_people_of_2008/?page=entire
————-
that came from The Beast – the illustrations are great – esp. Sarah’s!
http://buffalobeast.com/134/50mostloathsome2008.html
SMRNo Gravatar (10:00:33) :
Guess who is AlterNet’s no.1 most loathesome person for 2008? They hit that nail right on the head!
————-
that came from The Beast – the illustrations are great – esp. Sarah’s!
buffalobeast.com/134/50mostloathsome2008.html
Sorry for the double entry – thought I’d gotten kicked to the curb!
Lance the Boil aka Crust Scramble (09:45:57) :
Paula CochranNo Gravatar (09:32:30) :
Maybe you’ll get lucky and she’ll relocated to Georgia with her inbred followers.
——–
OK, Paula, I’ll be the first to say that we have our share of idiots here in Georgia, but please don’t tar all of us with the same brush. I might just take offense.
_________
Forgive me, yes, I will rephrase, move in with Chambliss and live with him and their loyal band of inbred followers.
Paula CochranNo Gravatar (10:28:52) :
Forgive me, yes, I will rephrase, move in with Chambliss and live with him and their loyal band of inbred followers.
——–
Thanks. But since we’ve already got ChamblAss, can’t she go somewhere else?
New threads up….it’s lonely over there….I was just talking to myself
How about we send her to Gitmo?