Sarah Palin’s Book Title – Time to Vote!
You realize, of course, that actually trying to choose the best of your entries to put into a poll is an impossible task. I guarantee I have not listed many titles that left me in stitches! But a poll can only be so long, and this one is ridiculously long as it is with 113 entries. Why 113? Because I had to stop somewhere.
Have I left off your favorite? Please hat tip them in the comments.
I have tried to attribute the entries, but some had several people who were the same or close. If I’ve forgotten to attribute something to you, drop me an email at akmuckraker(at)yahoo(dot)com and I’ll fix it. In a couple rare instances, I took the liberty of combining the best of a couple ideas into a hybrid entry.
I did not use entries that were already used in Mudflats post titles, like The Audacity of Hype and The Lyin’ The Witch and the Wardrobe.
So choose your top 10. Then you’ll understand a small taste of the torture I just went through. Narrowing these down is not easy.
(gives you a snappy salute) Good luck. The poll will be open until midnight Saturday. So, email your friends if they want to get in on the fun. I’ll announce the winners Sunday.
What Would You Name Sarah Palin's Book?
- Sarah Vain and Simple [Cathy in Texas] (23%, 355 Votes)
- Lipstick on a Dipstick [Obamanos] (18%, 274 Votes)
- How To Succeed Without Ever Accomplishing Anything. [PepperzMom] (18%, 274 Votes)
- Winkin' Blinkin' and Todd [GA Peach (15%, 236 Votes)
- The Audacity of Me [The Right Reverend] (14%, 220 Votes)
- Carpe per Diem [Rob] (13%, 196 Votes)
- It Takes a Village Idiot [Dame] (12%, 193 Votes)
- Don't Know Much About Geography - The Sarah Palin Story [True Dem] (12%, 185 Votes)
- Northern Overexposure [lilybart] (11%, 178 Votes)
- Magical Thinking: The Sarah Palin Guide to Governance and Abstinence [mudflats fan] (11%, 174 Votes)
- How to Employ Friends and Irritate People [sapient a. ohm] (11%, 172 Votes)
- True Confessions of a Pathological Liar — the Palin Story [Merida, Venezuela] (11%, 165 Votes)
- My Children are Off Limits, or, a Personal Journey Through the Lives of my Children [MimiC] (10%, 156 Votes)
- If at First You Don't Succeed, Lie, Lie Again! [Mona Lisa in CT] (10%, 153 Votes)
- In What Respect, God? [Paula] (9%, 144 Votes)
- Nonsense and Nonsensibility [dee] (9%, 135 Votes)
- Hate, and the Hating Haters Who Hate Me [blooper] (9%, 135 Votes)
- "Also" and the sequel "Also Too" [Dr. Chill] (8%, 130 Votes)
- Fear and Loathing in Wasilla: The Strange and Terrible Saga of Sarah Palin [Big Pete] (8%, 130 Votes)
- The Silence of the Turkeys [empish] (8%, 129 Votes)
- I Narcissus: How I Bamboozled, Bullied and BSed My Way to Fame…And I Ain’t Done Yet! [Caprityme] (8%, 120 Votes)
- Mavwreck [Bea] (7%, 117 Votes)
- An Inconvenient Goof [Alaska Disasta] (7%, 113 Votes)
- Lyin’ In Winter (And Spring. And Fall. And Summer. Also.) [BJA] (7%, 105 Votes)
- And I Would Have Gotten Away With it if it Wasn't for These Darn Bloggers! [Daniel M] (7%, 102 Votes)
- If You Can Read This Title You’re Too Smart For This Book [blooper] (6%, 101 Votes)
- How to Win Fools and Influence Sheeple [UK Lady] (6%, 100 Votes)
- Pulp Diction [seattlefan] (6%, 96 Votes)
- Moose Stew for the Ethically Challenged Soul [whiskeyotter] (6%, 95 Votes)
- The Devil Wears Red Naughty Monkey Shoes [lisabeth] (6%, 95 Votes)
- Sarah Palin: Fighting the Gotcha Media One Press Release at a Time (and Also Too, 1,000 Ways Cookies Can Save a Village) [Slappy OC] (6%, 94 Votes)
- Politics for Dummies [Melody] and [Ryan H] (6%, 93 Votes)
- On a Clear Day, I Can See Juneau [GA Peach] (6%, 93 Votes)
- Mooselini: Fascism in the Last Frontier [the problem child] (6%, 91 Votes)
- I Can Do Whatever I Want Until the Courts Tell Me I Can’t - Including Also This Book [kettletop] (6%, 90 Votes)
- All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten: The Sarah Palin Guide to Governing [Crabby Patty] (6%, 90 Votes)
- Blathering Heights [Karen Suriano] (6%, 90 Votes)
- Alienation Nation: My Special Role in Growing the Democratic Party [lynn (MA) hussein] (6%, 88 Votes)
- Just Say No! How Abstinence Worked for Me and My Family [Duck Driver] (6%, 86 Votes)
- Jesus Loves You...But He Loves Me Best [curioser] (6%, 86 Votes)
- God is My Ghostwriter [woodstove] (5%, 85 Votes)
- All My Wisdom, A Leaflet by Sarah Palin [Blanche Madison] (5%, 85 Votes)
- Lord of the Lies [drdubsky] (5%, 84 Votes)
- Palin Place [Jim Sutton] (5%, 83 Votes)
- Baked Alaskan and Other Recipes for Disaster [John] (5%, 82 Votes)
- Winkin', Not Blinkin', and Todd [Grover] (5%, 80 Votes)
- I Could Have Been the Decider, there also. [ENOUGHwiththetrainwreck] (5%, 79 Votes)
- Ask Not What Your Country Can Do For You, Ask What You Can Do For Me [Dr. Patois] (5%, 79 Votes)
- Palinocchio; The Sometimes True Store of a Religious Puppet Who Turns Maver-icky [WakeUpAmerica] (5%, 77 Votes)
- “Liars, and Bloggers and Bears Oh My” [zyggy] (5%, 74 Votes)
- Burn BEFORE Reading [Donna in Michigan] (5%, 74 Votes)
- Also, Too Sprach Sarahthustra [Freakout in Kansas] (5%, 74 Votes)
- Good Night Loon [Blue Idaho] (4%, 70 Votes)
- Beyond the Palin [London Bridges] (4%, 68 Votes)
- It's My Story and I'm Stickin' To It [Canadian Neighbour] (4%, 67 Votes)
- Drilling, Killing, and other Progress [sjk from the belly of the plane] (4%, 66 Votes)
- Does this Campaign Make My Ass Look Big? [0whole1] (4%, 66 Votes)
- If You Can't Win....Cash In! [Cynamen Writer] (4%, 66 Votes)
- Mommy Weirdest [lynnrockets] (4%, 65 Votes)
- Moby Hick [Keri Stevens] (4%, 63 Votes)
- Pale In Comparison - Pageant Walkin' to the White House [Professor Geezer] (4%, 62 Votes)
- Life's a Bridge, and then We Lie [Moose Pucky] (4%, 62 Votes)
- Ethics R 4 Dummies [windpond] (4%, 61 Votes)
- All Dressed Up and Nowhere to Go [More-A-Les] (4%, 57 Votes)
- As if I Really Wrote This [kimosabe] (4%, 57 Votes)
- My Bridge and Words to Nowhere (Laurie NC) (4%, 55 Votes)
- Fertilla in Wasilla [Irish Girl] (3%, 53 Votes)
- Grifters R Us [honestyinGov] (3%, 51 Votes)
- MoreOn Palin [brettapplebaum] (3%, 50 Votes)
- SO THERE, Katie. [Martha] (3%, 50 Votes)
- Over My Dead Body, and Other Motherly Advice [tealwomin] (3%, 49 Votes)
- Alaska, You Just Got Punked [autstintx] (3%, 49 Votes)
- I Meant to Do That; Sarah's Big Adventure [Jen in Japan] (3%, 49 Votes)
- I Ran for Vice President, and All I Got Was This Lousy Book Deal [Donna in Michigan] and [PepperzMom] (3%, 48 Votes)
- Blizzard of Words [Memphis, NY] (3%, 47 Votes)
- Abstinence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder [wearyvoter] (3%, 46 Votes)
- Winkin’, Slinkin’ and Todd [far from Fenway fan] (3%, 46 Votes)
- Who Moved My Vice Presidency? [whiskeyotter] (3%, 46 Votes)
- Palindrone [IB Wilde] (3%, 44 Votes)
- Sarah Potter & The Order of the Phonics [problemchild, 0whole1, AKM hybrid] (3%, 43 Votes)
- Into Thin Air - Clearing Your Administration of Pesky Whistleblowers and Incriminating E-mails [va soccer mom] (3%, 43 Votes)
- Das Krapital [husky] (3%, 42 Votes)
- Griftus Interruptus (I’ll Do it Till the Court Tells Me to Stop) [Rob in Ca] (3%, 41 Votes)
- Keeping Up With the Johnstons [luckycharms] (3%, 41 Votes)
- BFF: Me, Myself and I [Colorado Almost Native] (3%, 40 Votes)
- Whining for Dollars [Elsie] (3%, 40 Votes)
- Wham, Bam, Thank You Alaska [blooper] (2%, 39 Votes)
- Idaho to Alaska ~ How I went from Spud to Dud [Tina in Tennessee] (2%, 39 Votes)
- Which Lipstick Would Jesus Use? [Professor Geezer] (2%, 34 Votes)
- GOTCHA!!! [K8KZ] and [Jim Hall] (2%, 34 Votes)
- Lions and Tigers, and Bears, Oh My! Where's My Gun? [prisonernumber6] (2%, 33 Votes)
- An Idaho Spud in King Salmon's Court [Alaska Disasta] (2%, 32 Votes)
- Dude, Where's My Clothes? [cooky] (2%, 31 Votes)
- God Called I Answered: Whoops I Got Punked It Was Those Canadians, Again [aha] (2%, 31 Votes)
- Pulp Friction: A Tale of Whoa in the Last Frontier [AK Aurora] (2%, 31 Votes)
- I Was for You Before I Was Against You [WaCaGal] (2%, 29 Votes)
- WWJSOACLT? or….Who Would Jesus Screw Over and Compulsively Lie To? [Sourdough Mullet Hussein Palin] (2%, 28 Votes)
- Everyone (but me) Poops [yardwork] (2%, 24 Votes)
- Madame Bloviating [GA Peach aka Lance the Boil] (1%, 23 Votes)
- OK, I Wrote the Book, Now Gimme the Crown [OzMud] (1%, 23 Votes)
- A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning [Recycled by North of the Range] (1%, 21 Votes)
- Milking the System (Because We Like Cows) [pearl 89] and [AKM] (1%, 20 Votes)
- Charge of the Slight Brigade: How the Bloggers Hurt My Feelings [Lee 323] (1%, 20 Votes)
- No Returns, No Refunds [Doggonit] (1%, 19 Votes)
- I May Get Busted, But I Ain't Flat Broke [London Bridges] (1%, 16 Votes)
- Verbage [Evelyn] (1%, 15 Votes)
- Moose Nuggets for the Moonlighting Soul [Geneva FreeSpeech] (1%, 13 Votes)
- I Have Agreed to a Collaborator, but Every Word is My Own [Moose Pucky] (1%, 12 Votes)
- “Tfpoiejwoaisf niot siovut hioeshfg” [Global Village] (1%, 11 Votes)
- How Does It Feel Now That Your Wallet Is $29.99 Lighter, Suckas! [blooper] (1%, 10 Votes)
- Mental Torture [moseyon] (1%, 9 Votes)
- Burn After Reading [@anadventurer] (0%, 6 Votes)
- I Am The Cookie Monster [rebekkah] (0%, 5 Votes)
Total Voters: 1,561
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You’re right. That was hard. She’s just so easy to lampoon.
I, of course, had to vote for my own, but I REALLY do like Sarah, Vain and Simple.
Wow !! What a task. Thanks !! @ 856 posts…….easily will hit 1k.
OMG, great titles, too many to pick from, thank you AKM for sorting through so many.
I loved Shannyn Moore’s idea (as said on Keith Olbermann):
The Lyin’, The Witch and The Wardrobe.
Thus far it’s the best one I’ve heard yet.
Audacity of Hype should be one of the choices… might be easier if we got to pick 20 and then narrow it to, say, top 5. Wish I had done my “Boobsters and Butterflies earlier.”
OH the delicious delight and impossibility of making a choice.
Just close your eyes and pick. What a harvest!
Oh and yeah, Shannyn’s title should be among the choices, too. Also.
two i saw on philip munger’s daily kos thread, nov. ’08.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2008/11/18/14026/393
“Answers I Brung for Charlie and Katie”
“How the Terrorist Won the White House”
Thanks for the ten choices. One is way too hard.
I keep peeing in my chair from laughing.
Help me, someone.
I’ve got to choose 10??? I didn’t get past the first three before I was laughing so hard I couldn’t continue. Its going to take me days.
Darn, none of mine… I’ll have to ponder before I vote; there are just so many fabulous choices!
Missing from the list is:
Of Course You’re There God, It’s Me Sarah! (I Can See Your Crack)
It already shows a tally for me, which is a bit of a spoiler. And I can’t seem to figure out how to vote.
Okay, strange enough, after I posted that, the tally is gone and now I can vote. Must have been some issue with the cookies for this site.
(Now I want some cookies.)
I picked 4
:p
…….ROTFLALALALA !! Impossible! I think I would buy a .pdf or pamphlet of all of these. (please).
SP has brought such joy (etc.) to the world by simply being.
Ah, Sarah-the gift that keeps on giving, and giving, and giving…
I do not think I have ever seen a poll with this many options anywhere before, ever.
This may be some kind of world record or something!
Lipstick on a Dipstick is my favourite so far.. rofl!
roffl–rolling on the forest floor laughing
Her publisher’s probably loving the extraordinary pre-publicity.
Don’t peek at the results before you vote. It’s more fun to be surprised.
“Audacity: or I’ll Stop When a Judge Makes Me”
Love the cover design.
Also still fond of Mooselini’s Memoir
Lots of others remarkable that Moose Pucky will have to ferret out from the 1000+ creative entries and repost.
You are all hilarious!
If I were the publisher, I would be ALARMED how the book is already a national joke (see Letterman, Dave) before it is even written.
Definitely include the Audacity of Hype in the next round.
Prof: The publisher is Rupert (Fox News) Murdoch, so I think it is a “loss leader” for the right wing. There will be thousands of “bulk purchases” to put it on the best seller lists, even if there are only 12 copies sold to real buyers.(see Ann Coulter).
I like “The Audacity of Hype”, also my variant “The Audacity of a Dope”
I like a variation on
The Lyin’ The Witch and the Wardrobe.
I think
The Lyin Witch with the Wardrobe
is better aurally
@Bystander. Right. I totally agree.
But now, if you are seen with the book, you will look like a fool no matter how you got a hold of it! Because it is already a huge national joke and not a word of it even exists yet (except in THE SPECIAL SARAH DIARIES OF 2008!
Maybe I am slow today, but can you think of a recent book that got this much lampooning before it was even written?
Very slow out of the gate but I had to try at least one:
Valley of the CariboutBarbie Doll
I agree with DrChill. Or even, The Lyin Witch and her Wardrobe.
Can I just say: Thanks, AKM. Thanks, Mudpups. YOU ROCK. Funny funny!
According to Bill McAllister she works 24/7. She is going to write this book herself but cannot do it on goverment time. Hmmm? If the book is to come out next year, she could not have written it herself (and she can’t) in that time frame. When will she work for the great state of Aslaska????????
Betsy Drake–Well, it’s not like she really is much now anyway…
I started with 23 and weeded down. Thank god you didn’t tell us only three. And of course I have yet another suggestion: The Mendacity of Hype.
Oh, and I’m fond of
“The Hope of Audacity”
Funniest.Sh*t.Ever.
LOVE it. I have to read them again, it is too much fun.
saw this on another site and thought it worth repeating: “What to Expect when Prentending to Be Expecting” tee hee
I made it on the list YOOOO HOO
but my favorite one didn’t
“Six Years, Five Colleges, Four Kids, Three Jobs, Two Grandkids, One Husband and Zero High School Graduates Later: My True Story” by Miss Demeanor
So now I don’t know which to vote for so many are great
Betsy Drake: Maybe she can write it in her mind while she’s sleeping? Oh wait, even sleeping is part of her 24/7 watch. She must sleep with one eye open. Never mind.
“A Witch Hunter is My Co-pilot” didn’t make the poll.
I decided if I waited until Sat. to push the vote button, I’d go NUTS mourning over having to let go of “Das Krapital” to fit in “…Vain & Simple”. So I hope you all vote for Das for me.
Ha! My last-minute, woke-up-thinking-it one made the list! OK, so it actually WAS worth it to have GINO invade my first morning breath.
“How to Win Fools and Influence Sheeple” and “Sarah Potter and the Order of the Phonics” have been making me giggle all day.
congrats to those making the cut….maybe there will be PART II
i made the cut…WOW….[maybe a push of the PayPal button will help my chances]…LOL
so many great titles
I laffed all night, woke up this morning, remembers a few and started laffing again…
In the future when GiNO and her henchmen/woman are strong arming, a contest ‘naming that particular event’ [like this] will surely lessen the pain
Fertilla in Wasilla was attributed to me….alas it wasn’t mine.
Will the real Fertilla please stand up!
Whew! I thought I was close to 10, then I went back and saw it was 15….it was hard to weed out the last 5, but I did it. AND, I simply love Sarah vain and simple… that has got to be the most clever thing I think I have ever read. Oh, next to the 800 or so other very clever things!!!
No envy here, AKM. I wouldn’t have wanted that job.
Oh, and I had another come to me as I drove home from work….
“Sarah’s BIG BOOK of Bullsh*t”
“The Audacity of Hype” should have been included. I also liked “The Book of Palin” from Countdown.
Juneau I’m An Idiot
or What was that title?
That cracked me up! I don’t think it made the list…
Or was it, Juneau She’s An Idiot?
Anyway…I thought it was so funny when I saw it in the original comments.
Some hilarious stuff…
You know…if a really talented ghost writer could convince her to take a self-awareness pill, it’s possible her book could be a true behind the scenes account of …
Oh, forget it.
It’s a pile of steaming crap.
Thanks AKM for the fun — For the break and release it has given from reality. I was blown away to see the results covering all the choices. Kewl!!
Wolfe on CNN reading/talking Palin’s defense of Miss Cali to Donna Brazille (who said she doesn’t care) & Alex Castellanos (who basically agreed).
Donna telling Alex off — quit whining and painting everyone with a wide brush!!!
There were so many entries I entirely missed seeing the one for “Sarah Vain & Simple” Dang! That would’ve been a definite !
Too too many good choices. And, I have to agree that “The Lyin, The Witch and The Wardrobe” is fabulous.
Here in Buffalo NY, I generally receive a polite ” Palin ? Does it really matter what goes on in Alaska?” type response when I bring this up. My attempts to draw it all out into the larger picture doesn’t have much effect. As many here have said before, it’s good to be in the company of other folks that “get it”. This is something that resonates along and within so many strings of the political and cultural grid.
I’ve been left feeling lately terribly sad for her children though. This is their family legacy and history that is unfolding. I almost wish there was a quiet “fund” that we could contribute for them for the future. At some point we could let them know we were on their side and help them move past all of this somehow.
Best wishes and warm thanks to all !
Agreed…. impossible to narrow the choices down. Waaaay too many good ones.
quite a selection…I’ll vote when I get a chance to read them all.
I wish one choice was “The day I disappeared into obscurity”.
Vagina Moronlogues made me laugh the hardest.
If you ever have a chance to watch the Vagina Monologues, bring Kleenex, ’cause you’ll laugh till you cry!
I have a complaint about your contest- my tummy hurts from laughing so much.
Prof Geezer wonders: is this is the most-ridiculed book in history (before it is published)?
My answer: you betcha, also, too.
Thanks Martha, that was mine, and I thought it was funnier than the one I had that reached the list, but never mind, it’s all good.
Oh God! How can I choose?!
TEEN SEX, LIES, & NO COMMENTS! (How you can BS your way to the top!)
47 Obamanos Says:
May 14th, 2009 at 12:48 PM
————————-
Juneau I’m an Idiot?…….
This was one of mine. It was my last toss of a name into the hat….and by that time, I wasn’t sure if I was talking about Palin’s book title or talking about myself for spending too much time thinking about Palin’s book title. LOL.
There were so many witty, hilarious, appropriate, spot-on, perceptive names by EVERYONE that I pitied poor AKM for having to select a reduced list.
Well, Lee 323, I loved it. It cracks me up….
I miss this plain old white message board…reminds me of the day in September last year when I discovered this Mudflats place just a few minutes after some woman named Sarah Palin was named as a candidate for VP. This little book title contest reminds me of all of the voices in the mist. It gives me chills when I think about all these people popping up and finding this site and saying, “Hi, from …”
All over the world, people were scared, shocked and desperate to know more about that woman with the hair piled on top of her vacant head.
All over the world, people were scared, shocked and desperate to know more about that woman with the hair piled on top of her vacant head.
———————————————————-
That’s a keeper!!
I’ve been a lurker at themudflats for a month, but have to come out of the closet to vote.
Carpe per Diem
(although, whilst laughing my butt off at ALL of the entries..really liked “Are you there God, It’s me Sarah”)
(My husband liked The Silence of the Turkeys)
Oh Lord, you have made my day with just the graphic.
Why are you so funny?
# 54
Democrat G Says:
May 14th, 2009 at 1:34 PM
TEEN SEX, LIES, & NO COMMENTS! (How you can BS your way to the top!)
————————————————–
Democrat G,
Following up on your theme… it could have been something like…
(old movie ) “Sex, Lies, & Videotape-I never said THAT ?”
I really liked BigSlicks entry.
I think it went something like this….The Bitch, the Bible and her Base.
Really too funny. I just sent this to a bunch of my friends. Some of them definitely think I have Palin Derangement Syndrome. Not my words or theirs, and actually I think it is her supporters who have that because they obviously do not see her clearly at all!!
What a blast AKM!
Thanks for the poll. How did you choose?
Mudflaters this is some of the best stuff.
Tears running down my face!
I can’t breath! I catch my breath and then read some more.
I have to admit If I had any idea that people thought me such a joke I could not hold my head up. I think one look at this is all that it would take to get me to go away.
I like David Letterman’s Title: “The Book To Nowhere”
Tip of the antler
to Cooky for:
Actual Responsibilities
The Last Frontier: Inside the Mind Of Sarah Palin
to Evelyn for:
Thin Ice: The Sarah Palin Story
to the problem child for:
Conversations with Sarkozy
To Kill a Polar Bear
to pearl89 for:
Another Roadside Distraction
I Can See Alaska In My Rear View Mirror
And one more for Moose Pucky:
Half Asleep in Todd’s Pajamas
They Shoot People Who Shoot Wolves from Helicopters, Don’t They?
AKM,
Can you track down flyinyoureye and get him/her to do a cover for each of the top 10 titles?
That would be a great boost to the hilarity here.
The lawyer is speaking about the book deal on the Eddie Boob show. He sure is earning his fees isn’t he. (as reported by C4pee groupies.
AKM…All good titles…Now you’ll have to find a pic. for the book cover!!! That oughta be fun..Lots of good ones out there…:)
UK Lady
Yes! I thought yours was priceless! I enjoyed it tremendously.
More tips:
to cynaman winter for:
Leader of the PAC
to Irishgirl for:
Alaska Family Palin
to problem child (again) for:
Lady Chattery’s Blather
Endless Bummer
to Corrine56 for:
From Here to Obscurity
to tpgigi for:
Gone with the Whine
@Pepperzmom
Just what we need…a great boost to the hilarity here.
As if we weren’t already pretty much wasted from laughing so much…
Does anyone know of a governor or any other elected official serving less than their first term of office who thought they should memorialize themselves for posterity?
(I’m trying to put a serious face on this, I’ve laughed too hard!)
Hey youse guys…. we’re closing in on 1000 posts for the “name the book” blog… go on over and add some more!!! WE can do it!
More tips to:
Cynamen Winter:
The Untold Truth
lynnrockets:
Me, T and the A.I.P.
Joe 12-Pack:
The Immaculate Deception
Duck Driver:
A Fool and his Money Will Soon Buy This Book
True Dem:
Don’t Know Much about Geography–the Sarah Palin Story
Oil of Me
ericmiami:
Evolution? Can’t Prove it by Me!
blooper:
From Rags To Righteousness
Hate And The Hating Haters Who Hate Me
Prideful and Prejudiced
GAPeach:
The Call of the Vile
AKaurora:
Culdesac to Glory: My LIfe’s Journey
68 Moose Pucky Says: May 14th, 2009 at 2:57 PM
@Pepperzmom
Just what we need…a great boost to the hilarity here.
—
69 Moose Pucky Says: May 14th, 2009 at 2:58 PM
As if we weren’t already pretty much wasted from laughing so much…
—–
What, MoosePucky? You don’t believe in “the more, the merrier” syndrome?
tip to InJuneau for
“Protectin’ Real America when Putin Rears His Ugly Head, or All My Foreign Experience Also Too”
Also one that had me rolling and very much to the point
austintx with (as I remember -hope I recall correctly)
“Alaska, Kiss My Ass”
Wow! I didn’t realize it was still going on…must scurry over there to read more delightful and discerning titles…
If Palin doesn’t read it herself, how WILL she answer questions on her book tour………….?.LOL
While Palin will surely be able to get huge amounts of press when her book comes out, Matthews makes the good point that the questions that haunt you are not the ones that you give an honest if unpopular answer to, but the ones to which you should know the answer but don’t. Matthews thinks these will be problems when Palin does press for her new book because she’ll be asked questions like “How did you write this book? Did you write it by long hand, on a laptop? Or actually did you not write this?”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/05/13/chris-matthews-on-palin-b_n_203286.html
Mudflats should petition Rupert Murdoch or HarperCollins to Save A Tree, send Sarah Palin’s book directly to disk.
@Moose Pucky
Yes, blooper gave us some really good ones. Joe 12-Pack and Duck Driver were also some of my favs.
UK Lady:
Rumplestinkspin
Uselessys
SueB:
All So Sarah
Martha:
All So Sarah
Palin’ around with Palin…………..me
Just a Farmer (slightly modified):
Days of Whine and Poses
Cathy from CO:
The Door That Did Not open
Punkinbugg:
Trigonometry: How Fashion-Assisted Camouflage Can Hide Your First Grandbaby
KallieinTexas:
Oh, Darn It…Here’s the Truth! (wink, wink)
C.Rock:
Tweeting My way to Truth
SK from MN:
It’s me, Sarah, Gettin’ Back to Ya
{{{{ombamanos}}}} — i feel the same way. so many people from all over the world were seeking the answer to WTF is a sarah palin?? and we stayed, we learned, and we made friends.
this place right here — the tipping point — IMHO.
and it was INCREDIBLY hard to choose only 10 ……wow !!
Just recapping a few of the many that made Moose Pucky burst out laughing. A tip o’ the antlers to all!!
Uselessys was totally brillant…and I needed many kleenexes thereafter.
The Seriel Killer of Syntax
I also agree with Bystander, no matter how wretched, this book will be bought in bulk by Murdock or his underlings and then packed away in warehouses or offered as a bonus gift to party lackeys.
Other titles that had me grinning:
Juneau I’m an Idiot? (but you can only get the verbal pun by reading it)
The Crying of State 49 (but might only be “gotten” by Pynchon fans)
I think these titles would be more generally understood:
The Hope of Audacity
The Lyin Witch with the Wardrobe
And finally I like:
Sarah Plain and Vain (because both “plain” and “vain” have several meanings)
(I’m not sure if the maetHaras would understand why this title is so delicious – they really don’t get the concept of “irony” at that site.)
Y’all crack me up.
Quyaana for the laughs.
Good to see “Northern Overexposure” rise up in the ranks.
Betcha Hillary will appreciate “It Takes a Village Idiot”
Missed “Magical Thinking” in my votes–but love it.
And “Mavwreck” is excellent!
Why thanks MinNJ x
I had a hard time choosing one. I guess the others could be chapter titles?
“The Terrifying Reign of Patriarchal Barbie; How the Dominionist Puppet in Naughty Monkey’s was Treated as a Legitimate Candidate for VP”
Not too funny, but true!
Moose Pucky~
Your laughter is as contagious as four giggling babes! And there are indeed waaay too many great options….
One of my personal favs is: “Hysteria Lane”
Ha!
This is to much!!
Some of these titles sound like they would be a great read!
Having to not drink anything when reading all the Book Titles and comments.
Way to far to the outhouse!!!! Gonna Pee my pants………
@Moose Pucky
Yes, that was also extremely clever word-play…are we having fun yet?
A late ineligible entry, but I like it!
While this entry is a day late, and a $ short, it is a winner!
Sarah: The absent, obstinate, abstinent Luv Guv!
Whatever that means?
There were SOOOO many good ones!
Poll started, but here is another:
Lunacy on Lake Lucille
Moose Pucky, MinNJ, Thanks for the shoutout. At the end of the day my mind was numb from trying to figure out book titles, lol.
As for the titles, I really liked all of them, that’s the truth!
Mudflats had a hard job indeed picking the final ones.
I love, love, love the hysterical Dr. Suess-like cover!
I tried to vote for more than 10 because it was too hard to choose and it was utterly impossible to count while laughing so hard. Hats off to the smart poll that forced me down to 10.
I would have liked to vote for The Audacity of Hype and Uselessys but didn’t see either…and so many more clever titles.
{{{{{mudflatters}}}}}
ha ha ha
i’m in stiches
“There’s No Place Like Nome”.
“The Alaska Identity: Why I AM ALaska”
by Sarah Palin’s writer.
@curiouser
Same here…{{{{mudflatters}}}}
Change You Can Conceive In
From Here to Maternity
LOL!
Need a little laughter to lift ones spirit.Ten were hard to choose fro so many but was a fun poll. I would bet money that Ms Palin reads here.How else would she know about us pajama dressed bloggers..She would not be able to comment because than everyone would know who she was
The Governicator’s book might be a blessing in disguise – it ensures that her followers’ noses are kept in the book and out of politics for awhile
(probably for many long months, especially if they really read it and don’t just look at the pictures).
On the other hand, all the bookstores that carry it are going to need to create a whole new section called “Political Pornography” on which to shelve it. And of course, they’ll need to keep minors and people with an average or better IQ out of there, so as not to cause undue psychological harm. Have her “socially conservative” followers considered this?
“Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.”
John Stuart Mill
(1806 – 1873)
Tough choices! All great
“The Lyin’, the Witch & the Wardrobe”
saw that on facebook yesterday and it is a good one as well…
I’m thinking a poster with the above cover and the 10 top vote getters. I’d pay for one of those. What do you say, ‘Flatters?
Whoa, that list is the BOMB!
Moved to open thread.
Does this Campaign Make My Ass Look Big?
i can’t believe this one didn’t get more votes!
Oh, Paula, that is such sad news. I am sending out my warm thoughts to her and her sisters.
Wow, this looks like it took major time and effort, but well worth it – great to laugh out loud! Thanks to everyone and to AKM. I have to give a shout out (and maybe a write in) to Pagentwalker and to Mavwreck. I just love those one word, catchy types. The one however that made me snort my coffee this morning (and I am by no means a snorter): The Annotated Executive Ethics Act: Wooten You Like to Know!
i just left a message at womanwithsadrinecan’s blog.
i hope that she knows that all of us here love her.
My picks for best of the latest:
Joe 12 Pack
Winkerbelle: The Palin Fairy Tale
Moolah Ruse
Tealwomin
Renaissance Woman: Rebirth of the Dark Ages
Moose Pucky
Tails (and Pelts) from the Last Frontier
My Selections for the Supreme Court
———-
Hey, thanks, cookie! That one was quite spontaneous, and would probably be improved as “Wooten Juneau”
I saw the challenge, sat down, cracked my knuckles to join the fray…
Then I saw “Pulp Diction” and “Also, Too Sprach Sarahthustra” and knew that I was in the presence of divinity, and out of my league.
You all rock.
Hopefully Harper Collins is going to have this book printed with perforated pages, that are quilted for softness. That’s the only way this book will have ANY use whatsoever that isn’t completely vulgar!
the problem child-fawnskin-
I think this hit me like a brick as my kids are about the same age. So, sorry AKM, I am an emotional mess. Her sons blue eyes -I see them every day in my own children. Ugh. Just imagining the pain is more than I can bare.
I missed the contest, but I would have proposed:
Bring me the head of Katie Couric: a Christian mother’s tale of spirituality, love and liberal media hatred.
The sad part is, Harper Collins will force any stores interested in selling the book as they will have some people come in asking for it, to order an outrageous number of them, most of which many stores would be stuck with in a discount bin. These forced orders will then make it appear that the book legitimately made the best seller list, which we know it won’t. You’ll be able to pick it up for 99 cents to line the bottom of your bird cage.
72 Star Says:
May 14th, 2009 at 2:49 PM
AKM…All good titles…Now you’ll have to find a pic. for the book cover!!! That oughta be fun..Lots of good ones out there…:)
***************************************************
Maybe this one……..
http://z.about.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/e/J/2/palin-messiah.jpg
I can already envision the summary description of her book…..”the story begins with Sarah and her struggles to lead a rugged life in Alaska. Also too perhaps the story is a testament to a simple Hockey Mom who happened to find a book entitled, “How to Win an Election”. Using her 6 year journalism degree, her permanently painted lips and her ability to use both friends and enemies to her advantage, Sarah leaped to great power. Youbetcha and so too, she marched from Wasilla to National attention, with every vote gettin child in tow. Perhaps too the most compellin, oh and devastatin part of Sarah’s story is the painful effect of the rugged, predatory, Alaskan bloggers. As Sarah tells all, life in Alaska is not for the weak spirited….. this story is just one of a series.
What fun with this book of hers!
@ Cathy in Texas-
Too funny! What a gift you have for writin’ in Palinese! You should write a parody of the book and try to get it into circulation first. You’d rake in those Palinbot Bucks, and they wouldn’t even notice they’d been had until the real one came out!
I can’t even read the COMMENTS, let alone the hilarious book titles! I’m peeing in my pants laughing and you guys are FABULOUS in your “creativity”.
I can’t even get it down to 10… there’s easily 30 that made my kitties run away because they don’t see me double over in laughter very often. It scares them and creates an inhospitable lap on which to sit.
When the tears dry from my cheeks, I’ll take another look and try to do so with a more “mature” demeanor and perhaps without a couple of Rum & Diet Cokes in me.
KUDOS to all for your hilarious submissions!
Have to applaud a suggestion from over on palindeceptions, by lilybart:
“What to Expect When You’re Faking Expecting”
I can’t believe that none of the ones I liked are included in the voting list! I copied my favorites to share with friends and family and if yours is included, know that I gave the Mudflats blog credit — even for the ones I tweaked a bit! THANK YOU for all the giggles. Here they are:
• What’s Truth Got To Do With It? • Crime Without Punishment • Days of Whine and Rusch Limbaugh • Sarahcuda • Abstinence and Prejudice • Who’s Your Mama? • Other People’s Money • What Volcano? • Sarah Palin: The End of an Error • I Will Tell You Why The Oceans Near The Shore Also Too • The Vagina Moronologues.
All the titles are hilarious and one of my favorite is Venezuela’s, “True Confessions of a Pathological Liar, The Palin Story”. I love it and am still cracking up.
Oh my! So many hilarious and clever titles…how can we pick just 10! I have to say we are a clever bunch here! I didn’t get to read all of the suggestions, but I laughed my yaknowwhat off all last night. I’m on my way back to that thread to see what I missed. This was a hoot!
LOVE the book graphic at the top of this thread….too funny and very appropriate!
Shout out to whomever put out “Vagina Moronologues” I almost fell out of my chair laughing on that one! I saw the Vagina Monologues and it was amazing! Very clever!!!
I think Global Village’s title reads just like what Sarah Palin says. At least, whenever she opens her mouth, what i hear is “Tfpoiejwoaisf niot siovut hioeshfg.”
Obamanos comes up with yet another great title… “A pile of steaming crap.”
Or, as the amish calls it, “road apples.”
Here are a couple more….
Witch Doctor hold my hand
I walk through a salad of words.
Thanks for a good laugh AKM
If you are still thinking up Book Titles, pop over to the Name The Book blog and post them. Only 58 more and it hits a 1,000 posts!!!
If you have any more title ideas, put them over under the other thread.
Help AKM reach the magical 1000 mark for comments!! Only 57 more needed to reach the 1000 comment level.
Yes we can !!
I’ve run out of title ideas. Not that any of mine have made any lists. Bit short on the creative side on this.
the amount of time spent compiling all those options borders on obsession.
I couldn’t even pick my own contribution on the list… because there were so many good ones. I got it down to 15…. and eliminating the last 5 was tough. My choices picked 2 in the top 5… so not so bad. There could easily be a Top 20.
I posted a question on the other thread, but there is not a lot of activity there.
Are there any MudPuppies here (from Wasilla) that were going to the High school graduation tonight…. we need details.
Bwa ha ha…heh heh…good ones. And good thing I didn’t have a liquid beverage in my hand:-)
I know this entry is too late, but here’s a book title my wife came up with:
“She’s So Vain, She Probably Thinks This Book Is About Her.”
@Sourdough Laugh tears running down Moose Pucky’s face,
“On the other hand, all the bookstores that carry it are going to need to create a whole new section called “Political Pornography” on which to shelve it.”
I guess they can put Bobby Jindal’s upcoming book in this section, also.
Oh, and this:
Nobama Mama
Wait…wait…wait! I downloaded this from John Aravosis’ Americablog:
John Aravosis (DC) on 5/14/2009 09:33:00 PM
From an email going around:
Gov. Palin is reported to have signed a contract to write a book about her life, including her experiences as the Republican Vice Presidential candidate last year. In recent efforts to rehabilitate her image, she has talked about her love of reading and mentioned that one of her favorite authors is C.S. Lewis. There is, so far, no confirmation to the rumor that her new book will be entitled, “The Lyin’, the Witch and the Wardrobe.”
I think it says it all, don’t you?
Blooper, excellent! Don’t she, Don’t she.
“The Id-iod: The travels of Uselesys” by Homer Alaska (Ghost writer)
I Can See Russia From My House, by Sarah Palin and her ghost writer also
Well after 30 minutes, I’m down to 15 …. hard to decide the top ten …. some were coffee spittin funny! Back to the list now, I suspect by the time I pare it down to 10, the polling will be over. I’m sooo easily entertained
Blooper!!!!
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
She’s So Vain, She Probably Thinks This Book Is About Her…
Oh my……….
That is TOO perfect….That’s like a Letterman number ONE on the top ten……..
The only thing I don’t like about it…I’m singing it in my head now….over and over and over….
Loooooove that title.
I really like your new one, Ashkee!
OK, I will try again on this one and hope it doesn’t show up a day later and 3 pages back.
Act Like a Baby, Think Like You’re Crazy
Somebody de-feather this bird. I just checked SP’s Twitter tweets to see if I could find an also or too …but I found something even more disturbing. She’s busy on her Blackberry announcing ethics filings against her dismissed. She’s ticking each one off …”another malicious complaint dismissed…”
Can you imagine this crass, shallow and mean-spirited wonder in the White House? Oh my word.
Anyway…I found a too….here is the EXACT Tweet from the brain smaller than a parakeet’s!
—Great day! Another frivolous ethics complaint against me was dismissed! I won against another false allegation, too! More info to follow…
How about: Arctic Cat Salad w/a disclaimer by Palin: Any similarities to any company is pure coincidence because that has always been my nickname. Also, too I had to throw something on my salad.
BTW – I noticed some comments re: The Lyin’ Witch and the Wardrobe. For those who don’t know, that is from AKM back in Oct 2008. Click on it in her post above – it’s a great read (o:
The Audacity of a Dope
These are unbelievably clever and funny. I had a very hard time picking just 10. Way to go Mudflatters!
Thanks Obamanos! I had it stuck in my head last night as well, lol. And yeah, your title was one of my favorites, it definitely got on my vote list.
Moose Pucky would now like to lobby for a boost in the polls for:
Alienation Nation: My Special Role in Growing the Democratic Party
Kudos to Lynn (MA)
Go Alienation Nation!
“—Great day! Another frivolous ethics complaint against me was dismissed! I won against another false allegation, too! More info to follow…”
Hah! This sounds like something Mudflats would come up with, but you know Sarah, she’s an endless source of comedy also too. So when one of these violations finally sticks (and I am sure that one will) I wonder how she will tweet that news?
“Aw shucks! One of them thar ethical violation thingys done took! Don’t you a worry though, I”ll a be fightin’ and a clearin’ my good name lickety-split!”
Just wanted to echo the suggestion of PepperzMom that cover art should be prepared for the top ten. I see it as sort of the “swimsuit competition” portion of this book contest.
After the winning title is chosen, you could solicit proposed text for the first chapter and poll your readers on the submissions. Who knows what could be achieved? We may, collectively, have the entire book written and published by Mudflats Publishing well before Harper Collins gets around to publishing their version.
I loved this title suggestion from a comment to Shannyn’s article “The New Testament of Sarah Palin: Spring 2010″ on The Huffington Post:
+ naughtymonkey
I offer as a title for Palin’s book–
The Sarah Palin Idiot’s Guide on How to Prolong Your 15 Minutes of Fame
And too. Also. Ad nauseum.
I feel like an idiot but I just don’t get this one:
Tfpoiejwoaisf niot siovut hioeshfg” [Global Village]
Could somebody explain it please?
thankyouthankyouthankyou
Darn, I wanted to get another book title in:
“The Immaculate Misconception”
well you have to admit, she make one heck of a creative muse!
Another one of my favorites….
Also…and Also, Too (the sequel)
The next project should be Lifetime Network Presents: The Sarah Palin Story
Starring….
Oh no…let’s not get that started….
Back to that book…..
Hooray for Sarah: Vain and Simple
The title that is oh-so-true.
Hey, Cathy in Texas…where are you? I’m in San Antonio.
Viva Obama!
65 Radishness Says: May 15th, 2009 at 9:29 AM
I feel like an idiot but I just don’t get this one:
Tfpoiejwoaisf niot siovut hioeshfg” [Global Village]
Could somebody explain it please?
_________________
That’s what Sarah Palin sounds like when she speaks. That’s why I voted for it (I’m one of the 10 fools who voted for it).
168 Obamanos Says: May 15th, 2009 at 10:06 AM
The next project should be Lifetime Network Presents: The Sarah Palin Story
Starring…
__________
Carrie Prejean?
Except this time we get to see the goodies.
I’m happy I placed top 5!
These were fantastic!
You are a bunch of creative, crazy fun people. Kinda makes me wish one of the Palins would re-pregnate (?) so we could come up with new names.
Thanks for the genuine laughs.
@Radishness
It’s gibberish. Had Moose Pucky laughing a lot.
I want to vote 100 more times for:
Alienation Nation: My Special Role in Growing the Democratic Party [lynn (MA) hussein] (6.0%, 76 Votes)
This one’s really growing on me. Help me out folks.
@Alaska Disasta hahahahahaha
Or how about?
Memoirs of a Misconception: Stories by Sarah Palin
I’m sorry, i can’t i can’t. the titles of her book will be longer than her book.
good work folks
Hey Obamanos
Cathy in Texas here. Lewisville, north of Dallas. Glad you enjoy my book title.
I am trying to pay attention to Perry and Texas politics but just can’t stop tuning in to everything Palin. She scared me to death during the campaign…..the result….I am now becoming more informed politically. So her ignorance, is my education …..perhaps too you betcha.
If I have replied in wrong area or manner, my apologies. I am a shy and inexperienced mudflat fan.
Another belated suggestion -
“How I Stood Up To Corruption And Lay Down With It! ( Also, Too)”
The ‘Disasta’ From Alaska
The Turkey ‘Killa’ From Wasilla
The ‘Drilla’From Wasilla
James Opiko: LOL, those are some good ones. It’s amazing how many things rhyme with Wasilla.
Hi Miss Cathy in Lewisville!
Good work my fellow Texan!
Guvna Perry really shamed us on that tea party mess. How embarrassing!!!!
Laughed uncomfortably hard at Wanda Sykes joke about the President giving the Queen an iPod….Wanda said, “An ipod? What are you doing giving her that? Give her something nice from the U.S….like Texas!”
(not exact quote, but close)
Oh well, your county and mine voted Obama….whew.
Cheers.
Obamanos!
Radishness Says:
May 15th, 2009 at 9:29 AM
I feel like an idiot but I just don’t get this one:
Tfpoiejwoaisf niot siovut hioeshfg” [Global Village]
Could somebody explain it please?
thankyouthankyouthankyou
————-
I was puzzled, too. I interpreted it as someone’s cat walking on the keyboard, which would make about as much sense as the prose in this book is likely to. Or maybe it was naughty monkeys typing…
Bush Batty Governor
“Sarah, Palin Comparison” on Campaign 2008
Another Saturday Night Live Special Appearance (scripted by Moose Pucky)
Tina: I’m writing a book.
Amy: I’ve written one.
Tina: It’s going to be all about me.
Amy: Mine’s called “It Takes a Village…
Tina: That’s nice. Mine’s going to be called..
Amy: …Idiot.”
Tina: Thank you.
Amy: Nice title.
Tina: Thank you.
Good one, mpb.
The gibberish title from Global Village is cracking me up now that I get the point that it truly doesn’t make sense. Perfect Palinese!
I felt like an idiot too, trying to make sense of it and couldn’t. Oh that is too funny.
Excellent title Global Village – sorry I already voted, it’s my favorite now (o:
The book cover is just as fantastic as the titles!
Please make sure ya all vote for AKM in the Netroots Scholorship
Only 6 away from first