Going Commando for the Holidays – Levi Bares All.
Well, after the last couple days of right wing propaganda, apocalyptic rantings, and the squelching of academic freedom, nothing quite lightens the mood like… full frontal nudity.
That’s right, Levi’s back in the news. He has made the decision, and it sounds like he will be baring all for the cameras in his upcoming photo shoot with Playgirl Magazine.
“He’s pumped! He’s ready to shock the world. The hell with fifteen minutes,” Jones told Us over the phone. “As a matter of fact, when I picked him up, he came out the house naked. I said ‘not now!’”
He came out of the house naked in Alaska, in October? Even Sarah Palin showed up in a towel.
Johnston himself took the phone for a moment to chime in, telling Us: “I just get naked. That’s what I do.”
You know, I hear he was born that way. So who can blame him? It’s who he is.
He will purportedly be raking in a cool six figures for the photo shoot and will be winging his way to the Big Apple in mid-November, so that the pictures can be “out for the holidays.” Phew. It would be sad to think of all those poor disappointed little faces on Christmas morning.
We don’t know yet what the “theme” of the shoot will be. Animal skins? Firearms? Fishing tackle? Santa hat? Whatever it is, Tank Jones, Levi’s manager assures us that they’ve been working out the details, and they’ve “come to a very happy conclusion, which we feel readers will be enthralled by.”
(Consulting my grammar book) Why, I do believe that man just ended that sentence with a proposition! At least it wasn’t a dangling participle.
This will be quite a month – Going Rogue, Going Rouge, Going Renegade…and now, Going Commando.
I can just see the “article” now………..what Sarah DID see and what she WISHED she had ………lol
Maybe he’ll find himself a sugar mamma………someone incredibly wealthy…..that has all the things the Palins aspire to…………Palin’s head would explode.
Have to credit Tank Jones with a great sense of humor.
I think the picture should be of him reading Going Rouge and using Going Rogue as a “Johnston cover”
SNL and Timberlake did “d(ck in a box”, Levi should do “di(k in a book”
@ 3 Tantef…… your suggestion really does sound so … so..delightfully evil.
{ and I mean that in a Good way }
Sarah and her Bot-Friends would literally go ballistic. And they would HAVE TO talk about IT which create even more publicity. What a dilemma they would have.
Even if the Magazine doesn’t use your suggestion… I’ll bet Wonkette might have some fun with it.
Meanwhile Letterman decided to add something extra tonight to the usual ongoing ” Things more fun than reading the Sarah Palin Memoir “.
He weighed in with the Oprah appearance news as well. He said ( teased ) they are trying to get Sarah to come on the show after Oprah… sarcastic small talk with the Producer. Said we are working on it… Sarah has NOT agreed yet.
More faux sincerity. Audience gets the Joke.
Sarah’s Oprah appearance has just doubled the amount of Jokes by Dave.
Dearest Honesty, delightfully evil is a wonderful discription of this old hippy, librul, progressive Attack Democrat, Attack Tante. Thank you!
I’ll bet that Sarah is wishing she’d been nicer to Levi so that the marriage might have happened. She might have had some sort of control over a son-in-law, but she sure doesn’t have any over Levi, the free agent. The whole thing makes me laugh, but I don’t think I’ll be viewing the pictures.
Tantef – good one!
I’m confused about how Playgirl can afford a 6 digit payoff to Levi, since it is an on-line magazine. It’s not like they will gain financially by us buying an issue. Do they hope to gain advertisers? Ha, Ha, maybe they’ll charge us to peek! Seriously, how do they make their $$$ on this?
Tigerwine, I just checked out the playgirl website…before I go blind I thought I would tell you that except for their welcome pages it seems to be pay per view @ about $20.00 a month. Off to wash my eyes out with something caustic.
I rather have Sarah let it all hang out. She should just out herself and ask forgiveness for the political hoax of the new century. Her pretending to be pregnant and then turning it to political advantage is worth several six figures. She doesn’t even have to show her figure to the world. Just bare her soul and ask for forgiveness, but not anyone’s vote. Take the tell all money and hole up in her expanding gilded cage in Wasilla.
Disappointed with you, Levi, maybe you are doing it to help your mama and son (the second grandkid).
Tantef – are your eyes feeling better? Well, that answers that question! Just couldn’t figure out how this could be profitable.
Thanks for the eyestrain!
Oh Levi
Go ahead and show the world what made you famous.
We will still love you….
Tantef-I like the idea of him reading the book while posing.
That would definately inspire a prayer session..
Let’s see – so to speak.
Sarah doesn’t mind running around in front strange “boys” in only a bath towel. Even with her husband there, her “Be with you in a minute, boys.” comment is at least half come on. And the Dud didn’t seem to mind.
Levi doesn’t mind running out of the house nude.
Levi, and the Palins lived in the same house together for a couple of months.
Modesty and abstinence don’t seem to be issues in their family circus.
It will be interesting to hear Sarah’s brain explode, again, when his FFN comes out, since Sarah has made sure everybody knows where his FFN was during that period of cohabitation, and it will appear right before X-mas, also too.
3 Tantef Says:
October 26th, 2009 at 10:37 PM
I think the picture should be of him reading Going Rouge and using Going Rogue as a “Johnston cover”
I agree. That would be just too hilarious, and it would go viral in a nano-second.
Tank Jones…assures us that they’ve been working out the details, and they’ve “come to a very happy conclusion”
Is a “happy conclusion” the same thing as a “happy ending”?
I think I’ll have to pass on Levi’s johnson..I’ll leave it up to you guys to report back to me when the magazine comes out.
A dangling participle? Ooh, you’re terrible.
Thanks, but no thanks.
To quote Ringo: “I said no, no, no. …”
I wish he hadn’t made this choice. It’s the low road and does nothing for his credibility. Couldn’t he have made money off his situation in some other way? I can’t imagine many people will blame the Palins for not embracing him as a son-in-law.
AKM… the word smith once again proves her knowledge of the craft.
Snortsnortsnort! You slayed me! I am still wiping tears of laughter from my cheeks: Your ” .. ending a sentence with a proposition. At least it wasn’t a dangling participle!” absolutely made my day!
At least Tank and Levi both used the word naked, rather than n*de. There is hope for them yet! N*de he will be during the photo shoot when he will be “nekkid and up to sumthin” in the words of some old Southern comic.
Tante, your suggestions are right behind AKM’s on the LMAO factor!
Oops, just got scolded for a clear text, so here is the *! Am I better now?
Keep Going, wherever that may lead, stars and all!!!
Levi is still a kid. Maybe when he’s fifty, he’ll regret posing for Playgirl, but I doubt it. I’m glad he’s cashing in on his 15 minutes of fame.
If the main attraction is Levi’s willy why all the moose meat & gym workout? Levi better stay away from places like Polk Street in SF. Six figures my, my my.
It was a phone interview; they were most likely kidding about him being naked.
I like Levi. I like Tank. I like Levi and Tank as a team.
I think the Playgirl thing is not smart, if only in that I heard he’s being paid $25,000, which I think is not nearly enough.
I hope Bristol is still “letting” him see his son(s).
Levi is a dick. He’s gonna show off his wee wee.
Ok – that’s a classic post and the thread comments are cracking me up as well. Loved your idea Tantef. Very clever. And “dangling participle” and “I get just get naked. It’s what I do.” will be making me chuckle throughout the day .
I wasn’t a fan of the Playgirl choice but seeing how he’s playing with it,
ummm… nevermind.
Be wise with your $$ Levi ! You’ll never get an opp. like this again. I’m hoping Tank & Rex are giving him good advice on that. I had a few other things to say but no matter how innocent, everything’s coming out as innuendo. My brain’s working in adolescent mode!
I cannot do Photoshop or any of those clever alteration things using photos, but here is my suggestion for the Levi Photoshoot:
Remember that photo of sexy Burt Reynolds when he posed n*ked in a magazine (put it in Google Images). Put Levi’s face in place of Burt’s, and in that suggestive hand-covering-the cr*tch-area, I see a copy of Sarah’s book (your choice, “Going Rogue” or “Going Rouge”)face down, barely covering the area, as if Levi had been reading the book, and just put it his lap to pose for the photo. At least, that’s how I imagine him posing for Playgirl.
His manager is named Tank Jones? Isn’t that one of the official Palin names for a baby boy? Of course, it also sounds a lot like a porn star name. And that may be Levi’s next career move. I can see it now–”Whipping Across The Tundra: starring Tank Jones and Levi’s Johnson.
Tank Jones is featured with Levi in the famous pistachio ad. His first name is really Sherman, hence the nickname. Love it. AKM
I think Playgirl will make plenty of money off this. They’ll have rights to the photos so besides the web site pay-for-view they can make posters, mugs and whatever. I like the G version with “Going Rogue” covering the Johnston. So if they don’t do it, then crafty Photoshoppers can do this one. Now I have to go back to laughing.
Johnston’s Johnson won’t be showing, it will be covered up. I do so love the idea of covering it up with Palin’s book, and reading Rouge. That would be a hoot and people would be all over that issue.
I hope Tank comes in and reads this thread, and uses it.
I think Levi should be standing in front of the tree, all decked out, with a straegically placed stocking or mug of eggnog, reading “Going Rogue”, with “Going Rouge” and “Going Renegade” piled on a table nearby. You know – the sexy librarian thing.
Oh my. I’m getting the vapors.
Ok … I haven’t weighed in on the whole Levi posing for Playgirl, or giving interviews or not, or whatever recently, but I have got to say now that this whole scenario with Levi and Tank seems to be some tantalizing, provocative game they are playing to get Sarah Palin. To elicit some response from her and/or her handlers? To continue to be a thorn in the side of Palin’s camp. I mean think about it. IF by some stretch of the imagination (and I really don’t like thinking about this) they had won the White House, where would Levi be now? Married to Bristol, living in the White House potentially, doing, saying, behaving only according to the RNC code. He’d have no freedom.
beautifulday #18 said:
I wish he hadn’t made this choice. It’s the low road and does nothing for his credibility. Couldn’t he have made money off his situation in some other way? I can’t imagine many people will blame the Palins for not embracing him as a son-in-law.
——————————————————————
I get the feeling he’s doing this not only to make money, but to thumb his nose to Sarah and her followers. He’s just reacting to her calling him a liar and a deadbeat, in a way that he knows will be offensive to her and to all the religious wing-nuts. If he can rake in some cash, too–so much the better.
I’m not surprised; 19-year-old men/boys are not known for their restraint and good judgment. As for being n*de, I say who cares? Everyone’s got the same parts, more or less.
My favorite sculpture: Michelangelo’s “David.” VERY impressive in person!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Michelangelos_David.jpg
Unfortunately, alot of the female celebrities made it big by posing for Playboy Magazine (which included male and female viewers). Levi has talked about modeling. He can’t be camera shy. I’m sure he is going to make a percentage off of everything that Playgirl uses. His lawyer is involved every step of the way. It will be like his lifetime royalty. He has bills to pay (his mother’s lawyer fees, his sister, Tank, his lawyer fees and his son). His viewers (male and females, young and old, agents and etc) wants to see more than his butt muscles. I’m sure there will be a clause that says you have to be at least (18 years of age) to enter- to view these photos.
Having visited a hot spring bath house once in Alaska, I can certainly attest to the people of Alaska being comfortable with their nudity. Which I found surprising for so cold a place, but hey, different strokes for different folks…
Here’s to Levi “letting it all hang out!”
Hunka fu**in’ redneck love.
(Being a dyke, I’ll take a pass.)
Levi – you do whatever you damm well please and have no regrets. I think above all, I am impressed that you have learned to shed your homophobia and for a redneck kid in the Valley, that’s BIG enough for me!
I’ll save my $20 for a coffee card but I wish you the best for all that the Creep Family has put you through.
I wonder if Sarah has Todd working out at the gym, also too. I heard that he was going to try out for a lead role in the next Wasilla Matress Ranch promo.
OK, folks. There is a city in Alaska where a local non-profit made a calendar for a fund-raiser. It went really well, and they did it for two years. The calendar had business men posing in the buff, with a little covering you know where. I archived one in my sentimental collection, because my son is in it. The whole thing was delightful and done in good taste. Since I don’t live in the community, there may have been some eyebrow lifting, perhaps why they discontinued it. I don’t know. What I observed was a lot of people bought them, and went around to the businesses to have them autographed.
Where can we buy the 12 days of Christmas calendar?
I see no difference in Levi posing for Playgirl and the average underwear ad in a high fashion magazine.Will he be embarrassed when he is older?I doubt it,its not like he is going to be an attorney or politician or Dr someday.Most likely he will end up working “on the slope”,doing some manly type job,or working on a reality hunting show,etc.In those types of positions,his photo shoot and subsequent notoriety will only give him some stories to tell over a beer.
You go Levi!!
Giving the other cheek
Levi has a lot of, well, courage, or he’s sure he has what it takes. There’s no doubt that he’ll rise to the occasion and show what he’s made of. Besides, it’s nice to know that a working stiff can also cash in on his celebrity.
One thing is for certain-once he receives his deposit, he won’t turn his back on the publishers (or their loyal readers).
I love it…
Look, my son is the same age as Levi… nekked is no big deal to him. The mere fact that he has overcome the homophobia crap is mighty good (agreeing with Martha Unalaska).
My sweetie posed nekked as a young man. He is 54 now and mentioned it when the story of Levi hangin it all out, had just surfaced. I was a bit surprised to hear about it. So I asked my sweetie: How much did you get paid? Who took the photos? And do you have copies? (snicker)…
Well “they” sold the photos on the streets of Albuquerque, NM. His first wife took the photos and no, there aren’t any copies left (sigh).
So I had to ask why he (and his wonderful first wife) would do such a thing? He said they needed the money to get to Alaska and find jobs. He said that they all sold and they got about $300 for their efforts. It was his wife’s idea, cause she knew a bunch of “feminist type women”. Apparently they were black and white 8 x 10 prints. I guess they were kinda “artsy”. My sweetie was lyin on a hilltop with some scenic mountains in the back ground.
So this morning, I asked my sweetie to pose like he did back in the day… LOL… he did, but I didn’t take a photo… but heck yeah, I could see my older, feminist type aunties, buyin his nekked photo.
He just laughs at me and I just giggled.
Look, Levi is handsome. I got no problem with it at all.
Yeah, Levi reminds me of a typical Alaskan young man. Could be anyone on the streets here. I like his calm demeanor the best…he reminds me of the guys I grew up with here or my own son. Levi’s natural Alaskan ability to fit in anywhere has already taken him on one wild ride.
Seriously, I can’t wait to hit my little paypal just to get the hubby’s reaction – …yeah baby. Can’t wait.
Headline news just reported that Winky received one and one-quarter million dollars for her retainer for her book…not too MUCH, also too!! No wonder she’s sticking to her old neighborhood.
So many puns…..so little time!
Love the “dangling participle.”
Susie Essman from “Curb Your Enthusiasm” was on Countdown last night talking about this very subject, and she had a somewhat amusing take on it.
daisydem@30/old Levi would be banging away in the west room
WASHINGTON POST from CBS interview
“I’m going to leak some things on her.”
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/tvblog/2009/10/palins-grandbaby-dad-im-going.html
If Levi had said ” I’m doing this so that I can make child support payments to support my kid ” – he’d have been viewed as a hero! Someone missed a great opportunity here to turn him into a sympathetic figure.
Out of all the comments above, I think I most loved the word “ball-istic” used in conjunction with Palin.
It seems to me that if this is six-figures, he’ll in the very least tie Palin’s speech fee in Hong Kong…quite possibly surpass it.
Talk about going “ball-istic!”
What can I say?
Levi is a victim?
SP is an a**hole?
Well, in AK things are proceeding, indeed…
Anyway, I won’t buy that book…
I’ll better crash my car, that will be funnier.
nothing good can come of this.
sigh.
unless it is lots of $$$… and the ability to help with his child support (as mentioned above). the not paying his child support hurts his image more than… his actual “unscripted” image…
“As a matter of fact, when I picked him up, he came out the house naked. I said ‘not now!’”
Funny as heck!
Who is accusing him of not paying child support?
I hope he is laying on a Grizzly bear rug in front of a roaring fire in at least one shot. He can still be reading Going Rouge with Going Rogue in front of his Xmas package.
Levi watch out momma’s got her hands in your pockets.
Bristol is Teen Abstinence Ambassador for the Candie’s Foundation. My In 2009 she worked with the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. She has duties as a paid spokeswoman.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_Palin
I also read Bristol has two jobs. One or both may pay better than Candies. She might be the main bread winner in the family.
When child support is worked out they take both parents income into consideration.
she (Bristol) graduated from high school last year and is working two jobs to support her son
http://sarahpalininformation.wordpress.com/2009/10/18/happy-birthday-bristol-palin/
#36 October 27th, 2009 at 8:44 am Polly Says:
“”…a city in Alaska where a local non-profit made a calendar for a fund-raiser. It went really well, and they did it for two years. The calendar had business men posing in the buff, with a little covering you know where.”"
I remember that very well LOL because one man had the same name as my husband and OOOOHHHH the phone calls we got from women looking to meet him!!!! (and one man, I must add).
Many female celebrities pay alimony and child support when they make more money.
I think Levi is trying to be a significant bread winner in this situation. I don’t fault him for that.
Playgirl pay for view is not sleazy. He can go into a calendar and more from this. I think he’ll show more sense of humor than anything to shame grandma. But if he does show the Johnson in the pay for view forum only those that seek it out will see.
It does not mean lack of credibility.
With Bristol working for the Candies Foundation and two jobs I can see why he wants a six figures salary.
wickedly funny post!
If Levi made enough $$, the Palin family would probably welcome him back into the fold real quick. What a soap opera!
O. M. G. That was just level of levity I needed after checking today’s headlines. WOW. Now that’s something I might just have to check out. I’m just sayin’. hee hee!! Ya know, these palins and levi’s, they just keep giving, what nice folks they are! Bless their hearts.
I thought Sarah said her daughter Bristol was going to nursing school.
Of course One can’t believe anything she has to say.
3 Tantef Says:
October 26th, 2009 at 10:37 PM
I think the picture should be of him reading Going Rouge and using Going Rogue as a “Johnston cover”
I agree. That would be just too hilarious, and it would go viral in a nano-second.
I agree and hope either someone from his family,his sister.,him or Tank read a little here and go with it. Sure puts grandpa Heath in his place about working now doesn’t it? You know it sounds to me from what Levi says that he is being given a hard time and I do wonder if they let him see his son at all any more. nary a word about that.And if he wants even half shared custody he has to have money to fight for it.You can be sure the Palins and Heaths will give Bristol what she needs or wants to fight this all the way. Palin won’t want Levi to have any control where his son is concerned.I think a lot of things Levi might not have said anything about because they were personal but palin opened the door by lying and he will go from there.
I appreciate that most of you here are accepting Levi’s nude posings with a liberal attitude..Hooray for mudpups and hooray for the absolutely roll on the floor funny post from AKM.
I personally don’t care who shows what to whom, and well, if there are dollars involved then I say go for it Levi.
Levi had a job and he lost it thanks to his future mother-in-law. He seemed more than happy to follow in his Dad’s footsteps and intern as an apprentice electrician on the slope and have his future cut out for him. So, what is a handsome, fit young man to do to make some cash? (I guess he really should pursue his GED, but at this point that would only get him a job at McD’s…)
I guess he’s just playing off the fame that he himself never asked for, so good for him. I do hope that he will continue his education at some point but he does seem to have grown as a person and that is certainly important. He is light years beyond his ex-future mother-in-law when it comes to tolerance of minorities and for a boy who grew up as a self professed “redneck” that speaks volumes about his character.
I think he is certainly a work in progress and with the right tutelage he may go far in life.
We shouldn’t care if that beginning in life requires gettin’ nekkid for $.
Oh my….this post has me laughing my you know what off! I’m not kidding. Hilarious play on words.
He’s a kid, has the spotlight on him and I wish him well. I hope this doesn’t come back and bite him when he is in his 30′s or 50′s…..or 60′s. Lol!
I’ll be amazed if Tank doesn’t show up in the centerfold with Cariboy. I’ve not seen an interview, a show appearance or a photo shoot (every one reported as news) that hasn’t spotlighted ol’ Tank.
Personally, if I was going to be presented to the world as a mindless meat puppet, I’d want someone a little more Machiavellian standing behind me. Otherwise, it’s just embarrassing.
Err…Uhhhm….AKM, better go ahead and bust that grammar book out, again, or a dictionary. Actuall, I’m surprised noone called you on this, yet:
“…(Consulting my grammar book) Why, I do believe that man just ended that sentence with a proposition! At least it wasn’t a dangling participle.”
I think you meant ”Preposition” not ”Proposition”.
Preposition (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/preposition) =
–noun Grammar.
any member of a class of words found in many languages that are used before nouns, pronouns, or other substantives to form phrases functioning as modifiers of verbs, nouns, or adjectives, and that typically express a spatial, temporal, or other relationship, as in, on, by, to, since.
Usage note:
The often heard but misleading “rule” that a sentence should not end with a preposition is transferred from Latin, where it is an accurate description of practice. But English grammar is different from Latin grammar, and the rule does not fit English…
ROTFLMAO, Great post AKM and such inspiring comments. you ALL are too funny for words. I remember the morning Burt Reynold’s nekkid pic came out. All us young women file clerks pooled our lunch monies. Sent one clerk to sneak out to purchase a copy of the magazine. She came back, empty handed because it was already sold out. So we directed her to another place, yep we all got any eyeful (well, almost the full monte).
Later, I had a poster of Bullwinkle, the cartoon moose, with a catcher’s mitt in front of the Johnson, captioned “Eat Your Heart Out Burt Reynolds!”
I can’t blame Levi for taking advantage of this opportunity. He will make more money in one photo shoot than working a few years at McDonalds. Not only did SP blow his job by her mouthiness, no way could he fudge on a job application about his level of education, after the ensuing news uproar. Go Levi!
“…It does not mean lack of credibility.
With Bristol working for the Candies Foundation and two jobs I can see why he wants a six figures salary.”
The only thing lacking credibility is Bristol working as Teen Abstinence Ambassador for the Candie’s Foundation or the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy.
Of course, in terms of absurd irony she matches her mother.
@ aha #64
“proposition”, I thought, was part of AKM’s little play on words. Most of us didn’t need to dissect to get the idea.
Abstinence. It makes the heart grow fonder towards it’s true meaning when one has already pushed one or two babies out the old birth canal.
Not that the birth is the hardest part….if one is minding one or two small infants then Abstinence truly shows its’ golden heart.
don’t bite on aha’s bait……… just my two cents.
@ 69, Say NO to Palin
Hey, thanks for the heads up. Didn’t realize and will watch out for future reference.
I can just picture Gilda Radner saying “I just don’t get it. What is all this fuss about dangling part, disciples?”
DavidinEagleRiver – you are showing your age, and in my spitting out coffee laughter, so am I!!! Thanks!!!
We all know how competitive Sarah has been. After Levi does the Playgirl spread, can we expect Sarah to do Playboy or course for a much larger fee than Levi? In her own mind, she would be showing Levi up!