The Mudflats

Pages 153-164
AGIA and ACES (Alaska Gasline Inducement Act and Alaska’s Clear and Equitable Share)
I’m going to let this one lie, because you could basically write a book about it all on its own. It’s particular to Alaska, and it’s wonky. Good people fall on both sides of this issue. Some people I know think Palin was exactly right, and that this was the only thing she was ever right about. Others I know think that the gasline will never ever happen and Palin shot it in the foot.

Page 165
Attended lots of military events. Watched blue star moms change to gold star moms.
Went to Kuwait in 2007 (I think that’s when she got her first passport)

Page 166
Soldiers in Kuwait never complained. Visits with wounded.

Page 167
Her biggest argument with Track when he was a teenager was about whether he was going to play the hockey position he wanted to play, or whether he was going to play the position she wanted him to play. (Why is this an argument??) She thought that was pretty great.

Track was prone to injuries because he was a “grinder, a player known for workhouse toughness first, and finessing the puck second. He relished hitting the boards – and opponents. He drew a lot of penalties.” (Wow. That was one giant pile of hockey euphamisms for saying someone is a nasty player) Once a nice man came up to her and said he had played hockey against Track for a lot of years, and that Track had broken his hand. (A mom must be so proud.)

Page 168
But don’t feel too sorry for the kids that got the crap beat out of them by Track, because he actually hurt himself too, poor lad. He has a bum shoulder now.

She had to go to the ER, and Track was there and they wouldn’t give him water because he was a minor and if they had to do surgery he was supposed to have an empty stomach. She understood but was furious because an underage girl “could undergo a painful, invasive, and scary abortion and no parent even had to be notified.”

Page 169
Apparently she mentioned the abortion thing to the nurse who agreed with her, and she vowed then and there to change the parental notification law.

Track got tattoos to cover up his surgery scars. He got a Jesus fish and a map of the state of Alaska because he knew she couldn’t argue about him getting tattoos if those were the designs.

He left home his senior year to play hockey in Michigan. “He would call home in wonder about the diversity and the nice people and the heartland neighborhoods with American flags hung from doorposts in every town.” (Call home in wonder? But…but…I thought Alaska was a “microcosm” of the rest of the country. No?)

Page 170
Track hopes that kids from old America can truly appreciate this country and not take it for granted. His repeated injuries meant he had to “hang up the blades.” He was glad to miss out on her becoming governor because he hates the spotlight. He was still drawn to that feeling of brotherhood and saw his friends screwing up, and knew it wasn’t for him. So, just add together all that patriotism, love of conflict, desire not to get into trouble and stay away from the governor and – voila! He decided to join the military during his first week of college. (?)

Page 171
At a conference in New Orleans where nobody knew her, she bought a pregnancy test at Walgreens. She was pregnant. “Holy geez!” She was happy because she wanted a boy, and she wanted a “Starting Five” lineup. But she just knew her critics would say all kinds of mean things about her. She prayed about the situation.

Page 172
She “dreaded the comments from the Neanderthals who would think of this pregnancy as a distraction.” She thought about these less than ideal circumstances. Nobody knew she was pregnant and they’d never have to know if she got an abortion. She had a “sudden understanding of why many women feel pressured to make the “problem” go away.” But even though she knew what goes through a woman’s mind in this kind of situation, she was grateful to right-to-life groups that “affirm the value of the child.” Otherwise women who were tempted to continue the pregnancy under these circumstances might feel like they were the only ones that felt that way. Then they’d all just go along with what “society” wants them to do, and have an abortion.

She decided that having the baby was “the right choice,” and noted that it wouldn’t be the only time she had to make a choice about the pregnancy.

Page 173
She and Todd kept missing each other because of business trips and she told him weeks later. He was ecstatic. They decided not to tell anyone so they could have “sacred time.”

Page 174
She had had a second miscarriage between Willow and Piper. Her doctor “CBJ” was kind and caring. She had toughened up and took the second miscarriage better than the first.

She visited her doctor at 12 weeks. Was told that she was older and there were risks. She wasn’t worried.

Page 175
She had four healthy children so wasn’t worried. “Besides, my sister Heather already had a special needs son, who had autism and he was our family’s angel boy.” God knew what he was doing.

Got sonogram. Baby was alive. They found “boy parts.” “Relief blew through me like the Mat-Su Valley wind.” (Oh, good grief.) “God is so good! I thought. He knows what’s best.”

Baby’s neck was thick.

Page 176
God would never give her anything she couldn’t handle. She couldn’t handle a special needs child. God knew how busy she was. “Got to go-go-go.” Couldn’t imagine how she could handle it. Unles… God knew her better than she knew herself. But then she decided God wouldn’t do it to her.

Decided to get amniocentesis so she could be prepared in case. Went to genetecist alone. Snuck in the back door and used her maiden name.

Page 177
Finds out the baby will have Down Syndrome. Drives to Wasilla. Doesn’t cry. Her family always wonders why she never cries. She is stoic. She did not tell Bristol this, but she “chokes up all the time” at military events, when the Star Spangled Banner plays, and at new born babies. But she does this secretly when nobody can see. (Imagining her in a closet listening to the Star Spangled Banner with a box of Kleenex)

But she drove to Wasilla and her “eyes stayed dry.” Maybe there was a mistake. Is God listening?

Page 178
Got confirmation of extra chromosome. Found out it was a boy and thanked God. “For me, that was a glimmer of light and I let it warm me.” Didn’t know if she had enough love and compassion to raise a special needs child. (!) Wonders if you don’t have to be “wired differently” to deal with it. Almost 90% of DS babies are aborted. She again understood why women want to terminate this type of pregnancy. But she had a “seed of faith.”

Went home and told Todd. Finally cried. Told Todd it was a boy. Todd said, “See, Sarah? God knows what He’s doing. This is great!” Then she told him about the DS.

Page 179
Todd was happy and sad. Asked lots of questions. Said it would be OK. Wondered what kid would be like. Asked other parents of DS kids if they played sports.

Page 180
Todd was more accepting and optimistic than she was. She was still having a hard time with it so they didn’t tell the rest of the kids.

Went to Track’s graduation ceremony in Ft. Benning. Boot camp turns boys into men.

Page 181
Couldn’t spot him because they all look alike. “That’s the point,” someone said.
Remembered John Kerry’s comment in 2006 about if you go to college and work hard you don’t get stuck in Iraq. “What a loon, I though. What an elitist loon.” (You know… you ‘ve got all the time in the world to make edits and change things around. You’ve got many eyes on the draft of this book. And “elitist loon” actually made the final cut??)

Enlistees are smart. Track could have done anything else, but he chose to enlist. Thanks God for second-greatest generation.

Page 182
Target – Palin’s former mentor and then State Senate President Lyda Green.
She sent a letter saying she’d be away, because “after I was elected, the rules for governors’ travel seemed to change with no notice.” (Maybe that’s because no governor previously charged the state for the travel and lodging of their children all over creation)

She attributes the fact that people had a problem with these copious family state-paid travel expenses to the fact that she said she was going to be a “mama grizzly” for the state. So those darn lawmakers in Juneau didn’t want her to leave Juneau. “Ever.” (I am imagining readers in Juneau right now as they don’t know whether to laugh or just scrape their chins off the desk. She wasn’t there a lot.)

Schedules changed, people weren’t notified. Who was really in control of Juneau? The goodly gov, or the evil 69-year old entrenched politician who lived in the hotel that was the Sodom of Southeast Alaska?? I believe this is where the infamous “Where’s Sarah?” buttons first appeared on the scene in the legislature. She couldn’t be there when the legislature wanted her there. Was this the bellweather?

This was just silly…”let her be in control” Palin thought. (Riiiiight. Lyda Green, incidentally was the politician, and cancer survivor, that the conservative radio shock jocks Bob & Mark called a “bitch” and a “cancer” while they were on the air interviewing Palin, who just giggled.)

She didn’t bring her staff or security with her on the trip because she “just knew a double standard would apply.” And plus Lyda Green was enjoying all the attention from the media (projection perhaps?) Green rallied the media who “milked the drama.” She got grief for leaving the capital as the legislative session got underway but governors are supposed to “steer clear” of the capitol building during the legislative session otherwise people might think they were trying to interfere.

Page 184
They had to switch their schedule around so she could deliver the state of the state speech, and they made the graduation from boot camp but they missed the “family day” events.

They still hadn’t told the kids about the pregnancy but they dropped helpful hints like, “Sometimes life throws you a curve ball” to prepare them.

She wrote an announcement letter telling everyone about Trig’s DS and wrote it in the first person as God.

Page 185
The letter from God.
“I ‘ve heard your prayers that this baby will be happy and healthy, and I’ve answered them because I only want the best for you!” (?)

“Children are the most pecious and promising ingredient in this mixed-up world you live in down there on earth.”

“Some will think Trig should not be allowed to be born because they fear a Downs child won’t be considered “perfect” in your world.” (Fearing Death Panels already??)

Page 186
“Trig can’t wait to meet you. I’m giving you ONLY THE BEST! Love, Trig’s Creator, Your Heavenly Father”

People made fun of her for writing a letter in the voice of God.

Todd is a four-time Iron Dog snowmachine race champ.

Page 187
The Iron Dog is hard and long and cold.

People they know have died.

Page 188
Once Todd had an accident and flew off his machine and broke his arm.
He “soldiered on” and finished the last 400 miles of the race anyway.

Todd had another tea party with Laura Bush.

The Iditarod is also long and hard and cold.

Page 189
Alaska – Where Men are Men and Women Win the Iditarod (Another bumper sticker)
Iditarod musher Martin Buser campaigned for her and “appreciates America more than most people born and bred here.”

Lance Mackey won the race and got a call from the governor and took the phone not knowing the governor was a woman. “Oh, I fell in love with that musher and his lead dog Larry, right then and there.” (Huh? A) Why? and B) If she loves him why did she just share that embarrassing story with the nation?)

Page 190
My question from page 189 is answered.
A KTUU reporter (Bill McAllister her future Communications Director) asked her about the embarrassing interview. “Are you kidding?! More power to him! Good he’s not a politico – I like him even more now.”

(So… you have to be a “politico” to know who the governor is? And “more power to you” if you’re not paying attention? Those are the people the GOP really love! OK…that makes sense now.)

The next year when he won again, he didn’t forget her name because he named one of his dogs “Sarah.”

(NO. I won’t make a joke, and you can’t make me! >clamping hand on mouth<)

Page 191
She’s 7 months pregnant and “hadn’t put on a lot of weight” so she was able to conceal her pregnancy with scarves. Willow said she was “porking up” but she still didn’t say anything to the family.

She still hadn’t finished the letter from God, but they told a few friends and family she was pregnant, but not about the DS (I think). The kids were overjoyed.

Page 192
Finally decided to announce. Seafood reception in Juneau. She called reporters to her office and said she was having a baby in two months. They had no idea. And there was rejoicing.

Page 193
She and Todd flew to Dallas. Baby due in 5 weeks. She was due to deliver a keynote address at an oil and gas conference. At 4am she had a “strange sensation.” (water breaking) Didn’t want Todd to call her doctor because it was 1am and she just wanted to pray to God. But Todd called anyway.

It occurred to her that she loved the baby and “desperation for this baby overwhelmed her.” “Please God, protect him!” Losing the baby would be the worst thing in the world.

Told the doctor she absolutely didn’t want to cancel the speech and disappoint the people at the conference, including Gov. Rick Perry. She’d stay in touch with doctorand catch an earlier flight back to Alaska. They had plenty of time.

Spoke on the urgent need to tap conventional supplies and innovate on stabilizing renewable resources.

Governor Perry introduced her with humorous remarks about how they both loved people who cling to guns and religion.

She delivered the speech.

Page 195
The Wild Ride
Todd said, “Love this state, but we can’t have a fish picker born in Texas.” (That was nice of them to add the “love this state” part. It’ll make the book signing in Dallas less awkward.)

On the plane they talked about the fact that the letter from God had not been sent yet and that nobody was prepared, not even the other kids. They wondered if they had handled it properly. They prayed to God to make everyone else ready because they hadn’t.

“Many hours and two plane flights later” Trig was born. (Flight from Dallas bypassing hospitals, to Seattle, stop in Seattle (bypassing hospitals), flight from Seattle to Anchorage (bypassing hospitals), Drive from Anchorage 45 minutes north to hospital. What happened to “Please God, protect him.” and “losing the baby would be the worst thing in the world?”)

Todd and daughters were nearby for the birth. (Hey, I thought Chuck Heath “saw him pop out, dumbass.”)

She was glad that God put her into labor early so she got to see the baby sooner.

Page 196-199
Got an email from an oil worker that said “Go to hell, but resign first.” (Hmm.)

More oil wonky stuff about freeing up leases on Pt.Thompson.

She had a fine working relationship with Democrats. Democrats were amazed she would work with them.

The press was decent and fair her first years in office, but then that last year they got really mean all of a sudden.

Exxon Mobil people from Australia gave her a jar of Vegemite. They weren’t trying to thank her, they were trying to kill her. (It’s OK, I bet they won’t read the book)

Page 201
Targets – Walt Monegan and Hollis French
It’s all about fiscal conservatism. Walt Monegan (Commissioner of Public Safety that she fired for not axing Mike Wooten) announced his funding requests for his department in public, and wanted more money. (To deal with Alaskan issues like alcohol and substance abuse, domestic abuse, sexual assault and violent crime. We are first in the nation for several of these.) How dare he request this in public? He was trying to get what he wanted using an old political trick, to try to shame the state into dealing with these problems instead of letting them sock the money away somewhere and let the governor get “red pen” fiscal conservative credit while people in her own state were literally dying. What a jerk. What insubordination! She was going to be fiscally conservative, and Alaskans be damned.

And all of this was on the wish list of unions and the Democrat legislator Hollis “Gunny” French. He got the nickname because he liked to think he listed himself as having one year of military service when really it was only attending a military course in college. And anyway he was a “ringleader” in the ethics probe that found her guilty of abusing her position as governor.

Some union members and Democrat friends were offended when I later branded Monegan’s behavior ‘insubordinate.’ Is there a better term for it? As I write this, I’m thumbing through a thesaurus….still looking….still looking. Nope. Seems like insubordination to me. I had the final say on the budget. It was my responsibility to make it efficient.

(Oh, where to begin… First you don’t have a “Democrat” friend. Just like I don’t have a “Rethuglican” friend. If they are your friend, you don’t insult them in the descriptor. Second, I don’t think someone who is actually trying to help people to the best of his ability, in the face of desperate misery, with what resources he has available to him is insubordinate. I think that person is humane, and is more concerned with people than politics. I think that a certain governor was feeling a little bit threatened, and would rather slash a budget that be humane to her people. I think she’s no protective mama grizzly. I think she has more than a helping of selfish pride. I’m sure there’s some Bible quote for that. And I really really want to go back and make that joke about the dog from page 190 now, where I had to clamp my hand over my mouth. There’s got to be another word for that. As I write this, I’m thumbing through a thesaurus …. still looking … still looking. Oh, I found it!)

Page 202
Oh, she’s not finished with Walt Monegan yet. If he wanted to dictate a budget so bad, then he should run for office. He did run for mayor and didn’t do very well. Isn’t pouring salt in wounds fun?

But wait there’s more. She was “surprised” that he went to Washington D.C. to lobby for earmarks. SHE on the other hand doesn’t want any help from the federal government, especially for stupid stuff like funding to deal with sexual assault problems. You can take your money and shove it, Washington. We’d rather be #1 in the country for sexual assault than take any help from you.

Then the evil DemocrAT lawmakers started telling lies about the fact that Monegan got fired because the governor’s office pressured him repeatedly to fire Mike Wooten and he wouldn’t do it.

My head hurts.

Page 203

Page 204
She did an interview and photo shoot for Vogue. All she wanted to talk about was national security and energy independence because “fashion trends” didn’t interest her. (Ha!) For some reason the Vogue writer didn’t want to hear about oil and gas.

Page 205
Gas line. Got a bid from China. Didn’t want to deal with communitsts, but their application was incomplete anyway, and rejected. But there was Trans-Canada! Hooray! She could almost see the tape across the finish line then! (Looking through binoculars….don’t see tape)

Page 206
Name drops a lot of media outlets and people she talked to like… Glenn Beck.
Talked to them about ANWR.

Page 207
She was interviewed about the gasline and ANWR by reporters from the Wall Street Journal, Time, the Associated Press, Investor’s Business Daily and Forbes. “Perhaps that’s why I was so shocked during the VP campaign when Katie Couric wondered which papers and magazines I read.” (Because you’re a regular reader of any outlet that interviews you? You still haven’t answered the question. WHAT DO YOU READ?!)

“Maybe I should have asked her what she reads. She didn’t sound very informed on our energy issues.” (Yeahhh….what do YOU read Kaaatie, you little Miss Perky smarty pants? Ohhhh, the obsession.)

Gloats about kicking off the pipeline. (Where IS that dang thing?)

Page 207
Finds out Bristol is pregnant. She was devastated. “It wasn’t the morality of the situation – what was done was done.” It was that her future would change in an instant. They prayed. God would make it OK.

Page 208
Agonizing comparison of her own tenure in office to fireweed blooming.

(Heading for a glass of wine)