Open Thread – Orange!
It’s March. Everything around here has been white, and grey and brown, and dark green for a long long time. My rods and cones needed a stretch.
This was taken in my mother-in-law’s garden. Mine never turns out very well, so I get to enjoy her green thumb (or in this case, orange thumb) every summer, despite my own personal failures. And the memory is food for the soul.
what a gorgeous picture…happy Friday everybody
Wow! That IS orange.
I have a request for a little something from the mudpups. I have to tell a little story first (settle in pups):
Once upon a time there was a wee little dog. He was a three day old puppy (eyes not even open yet). Someone threw him in the back of the local veterinarian’s truck. A longtime lurker, one time commenter, here had told the vet if he ever had puppies that needed some socializing time she would like to help. Well, he called her and she found her forever dog. She bottle fed him, socialized him, trained him and rasied him to be a handsome and wonderful dog. He was half Rottweiler and half Lab (as far as they could tell). He had a big and extremely friendly heart. They were best friends in every sense of the word. He developed a degenerative spine condition (like spinal stenosis in people). She got him on the right medications, brought him in for special exercises, did acupuncture and massage. She even bought him a doggie wheelchair. Because she took such good care of him he lived happily for at least 1-2 years beyond what the vets would have given him. His life had, unfortunately been difficult for the last couple of months. He was having a harder and harder time standing and walking–thus causing accidents when it was too hard to get up and go outside. She cleaned him up and loved on him anyway. He was still eating (in fact very much enjoying his treats) and drinking and wagging his tail and giving big sloppy kisses. She was crying a lot and having a very hard time dealing with the idea of letting him go. They have been inseperable for nearly 12 years.
Last night her heart was broken. He developed bloat and would not have survived any surgery. She had to let him go.
Her heart is broken. And I am a bit worried for her. She is blaming herself.
Everyone here was so great when I had to make this decision for my girl in December. Mudpups had such loving and peaceful things to say that comforted my soul.
Can you guys help me to comfort connorsmom? I know that she will come here but might not be able to speak/write.
She is the one who made all of the “Until there are none Adopt One” coats for Colleen.
Sorry for the downer post first thing but this is such a great community and we sometimes need each other in this crazy world.
I’m not good with words but I’m shedding a tear with her and send her all my love .
connorsmom, I cannot believe you are in any way responsible for anything other than giving your best friend the best life possible beyond his first three days. I know you will do it again soon for another. Cherish your memories and know you did the right thing all along.
((((connorsmom)))) There is a special place in heaven for those who care for the small and weak and wounded among us. Just like Dorothy’s tin man, you know you have a heart…because it is broken.
What a wonderful blessing you were to the wee pup, and what a blessing the wee pup was (and will always remain) for you.
L’Shalom.
…still battling the bug this morning, darn it!!! Into days without pay now, since I burn a bunch of “sick days” for Jewish holidays, but at least I Have a job with health insurance and 10 sick days a year. How do I hate to miss work? Let me count the ways, starting with the wonderful (albeit germ-y) students I work with every day…
Adding honey to the aspirin and OJ and lots of rest regimen. Happy and I had H1N1 LAST summer…10 days of total misery…this is persistent, but not nearly as miserable.
Is any flu teh bird flu for thatcrowwoman??
Wishing you all a color-filled, pleasant, and productive day. Back to dreamland for me…
see you later, sweet po-taters (got no time for “rascist” haters, poor Eddie)
As someone who once had 98 furry and feathered friends in our family home, I have this message for connorsmom:
You are a wonderful human being to have nurtured and loved your friend who has now gone on to doggy heaven. You know your dog reciprocated your love and was able to experience a great life because of your altruistic action when he was a puppy. You two shared a bond that death cannot break… you have wonderful memories of your shared life.
Please accept that you were obliged to make a difficult choice, a choice you made that was one of love and allowed your friend to transcend in peace. To decide otherwise would have been selfish and you did the right thing. Yes, your heart is aching now and that’s OK.
Try to focus on the happy times you shared while you grieve. You are in my thoughts at this difficult time. Namaste.
Joseph has some beautiful pictures of Colleen and “pint-sized Penny-the smallest dog to ever finish the Iditarod” Penny and Goliath were in lead. Check out his blog on http://www.rogueskennel.com
connorsmom, whenever you think to beat yourself up over your pup’s end, just remember all the love and care you lavished on him for 12 years. These years were a gift from the Creator to your pup and to you.The only one I see in this story who is without a heart is the soulless one who dumped him in the back of the Vet’s truck. Rest easy, knowing you were doing the Creator’s bidding by caring so selflessly for one of His creatures.
LMD…oh my! I lost one of my dogs to bloat on February 24. Ellis was a rescued dog (as are all the members of our pack).
{{connorsmom}}
(((Justafarmer))) I am so sorry for your loss as well.
Connersmom, I am so sorry for your loss. I too have had to make the same gut wrentching decision to let a beloved furry family member go. It is one of the most sacred and selfless acts we will ever have to face. Please know that you gave your little one rest and peace with dignity and respect. He will always be with you. Be gentle with yourself.
connorsmom, thank so so much for loving that pup. You are one of the people who make this world such a good place. Thank you especially for making such a tough decision and letting your sweet doggie find the ultimate peace with dignity. I can only hope those who love me will do the same when my time comes. God’s peace to you, and my thanks.
Oh, and those coats are totally cool.
(((connersmom))) I grieve for your sadness and understand your hurt. Our much loved furbabies give us so much during their lives and ask for so little in return. The greatest kindness we can do for that loved one is to release them from a world that no longer holds joy for them. It is cold comfort to know you did the right thing for your beloved when it tears at your heart just now. You are a kind, good, loving person who gave your faithful companion the gift of peace.
Namaste
(((justafarmer)))
@thatcrowwoman – you’ve had more than your share of the bad nasties in a short time. Rest, chicken soup or Chinese Hot and Sour soup, sage tea and elderberry syrup are sovereign remedies for flu of all kinds. Sambucol™ Elderberry Extract is most excellent. I get it at my local health food store.
All flu is for teh birds for thatcrowwoman! Get well soon. : )
((connorsmom)) My heart breaks for what you’re going through. My vet came to my house to give my precious kitty the release. She was much too young only 10 yrs old, but arthritis of the spine, it just wasn’t fair to put her through more pain when she stopped tolerating the meds.
I miss her so much, 2 yrs later I keep beating myself up as to whether I should have. But I never can get over the fact that her living a miserable existence just to keep ME happy was an option. I loved her too much to put her through more pain.
connorsmom, I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved furbaby!
connorsmom- I had to make a similar decision a month ago. I am still shuffling round my house, a habit developed to keep from stomping on beloved furbaby in last months. I am getting over my latest mad about critters living so much faster in time than we do and the wondering why, when we make the right decision, it feels wrong.
I will sit with you awhile here.
We have AKM’s lovely orange backdrop to rest against…
He may not have been a sled dog, but no furry guy could have worked harder behind the scenes, inspiring you to make those great coats! For every person who was moved to share their world with an animal who needed them, this dog worked overtime!
Lovemydogs, the story you tell brought back memories.
Connersmom, you’re in my prayers.
Rich
Beautiful flower, but I was hoping for a pic of SP, in a jumpsuit.
On the brighter side- click on my icon for some new pet humor- It’s actually pretty funny-
Titled: “Clash of the Titans” as my new puppy meets the rest of the posse.
awwww, connorsmom
my “Q” was in much the same shape as your boy and i loved on him til i just knew that my keeping him was just for me.
i lay down with him on his favorite part of the carpet in our bedrom for hours and we relived all the good times in his life. then it was time for the good ole boy to sleep and the vet gave him his special care and he was gone.
now i know that my boy has crossed the rainbow bridge and is frolicking and barking and having a marvelous time again.
it is never simple or easy to let our furry ones go join their friends in rainbow land, but they are happy there.
So beautiful!
Thanks!
HAPPY COLOR!! (Mother Nature is the only woman who can wear this color!)
Spirits rising as healthcare vote gets closer, but still being cautious…. CBO #’s looked good, now if Pelosi can just get the votes…… It’s not perfect by a long shot, but no preexisting conditions is SUCH a relief …. especially for covering children… ya have to go thru it to fully appreciate it,,,,
connersmom, I am shedding tears as I write this. I feel your heartbreak, I have experienced it myself. The choice you made was selfless and loving. The pain of losing a beloved member of the family is one of the worst pains there is. I have felt that pain when I had to choose and when I didn’t. My heart goes out to you and you too justafarmer. The care that you gave all those years is wonderful, you are really the kind of person that I love. I volunteer at an animal shelter, and I wish there were more people in this world like you. I wish great blessings on you.
Orange is my favorite color. I plan to get some more orange flowers for my gardens this year. Nice picture.
connersmom, you did the right thing. You gave this furry friend life when someone else chose to throw him away. It is never easy to make this choice even when you know it is right for them. Most of our critters have been rescues or dumpees. They give the most love. Thinking of you.
((((connersmom))))
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….
Author unknown…
Hope this poem helps you a little~it always bring tears to my eyes.
connorsmom – it is human nature to question yourself when a beloved soul has moved on like this (and actually, I bet he’s still around for a bit). I am having a hard time not just settling in and telling my own forever dog story because it’s very similar – rescued dog with health problems steals heart and won’t let go. Heart hurts and feels like it will never heal. Big hole in life. Somehow my fault because I didn’t save my forever dog (who lived to be 13 after the vets said “put him down – he’ll never be OK” at less than a year old).
Luckily you have dog people in your life, and not one of them will ever say “Oh why so upset? It’s just a dog!” Those people will never understand, never know what they are missing, and never be fulfilled in a way that I couldn’t live without. You have a right to grieve, you have to grieve. You have a right to feel like your heart was wrenched from your chest, but it will heal. Just let yourself do what you need to do.
It’s been around eight years now, and I still talk about my guy. I will always talk about him. I call my other dog his name, accidentally but pretty often. I always smile and tell him what a compliment that is! My guy helped me make a very difficult move, found my husband, brought together a neighborhood, and was the truly best friend I ever had.
He will be with me for life. That’s just the way it is, and we understand that. Lots of people don’t, and just don’t hang out with them while you are going through this. Stick around your dog people friends – they will help immeasurably. Hugs and best wishes – and talk to your guy if you want without feeling funny. I did it all the time! Still do.
and for connorsmom: Celebrate the life you gave that dear little creature. Who else would have tended so lovingly to him? Nobody but someone with a pure and kind heart. Well done, I say. It is never easy to let them go to their peace, but rest assured, that little guy will never leave your side. They never leave us. A torsion (bloat) is very difficult to treat successfully and is considered deadly in most cases. Thank God you were there to ameliorate his suffering, as it gets very painful for them as they near the end if they are alone.
I, along with many of us here, have been down this path many times. I lost my best cat last February to mouth cancer, after caring for her every need, even as the tumor spread, her face became paralyzed, her teeth came out, and she could no longer eat properly. Her mental status was normal, which was what made the “decision” so difficult. But she was unhappy and in pain at the end, and I know that it was the right thing to do, at the end of the day.
It is important to mourn the loss, but then let him go. He’ll stay around to care for you when he needs to go “check in” at the desk. It’s what dogs do. Let him go do that, then he’ll return and be with you forever. He’ll let you know he’s there.
Peace.
@ lilybart
“HAPPY COLOR!! (Mother Nature is the only woman who can wear this color!)”
Well, I dunno! I think Sarah Palin would just look fabulous in it! You know I couldn’t resist.
lovemydogs – I just started crying over that lovely picture of Colleen and Penny with the flowers under “Iditarod Veteran Colleen Robertia,” on the Rogues Gallery blog. I can’t even read the rest now, I’ll have to come back!
I think I’m going to print that picture out and put it on my frig – to remind me that when I whine about my day – I’m an idiot. Look at what Penny and Colleen did!
I’m sure it’s all connorsmom’s fault, too – thinking about her forever guy then seeing Penny the Smallest Iditarod Dog just sent me off to Kleenex land. Be back later.
“Heaven is the place we go when we die where all the animals we have ever loved run up and greet us”
- Kinky Friedman
We always feel like we could have done more – and we always do the best we can. I didn’t let go of my old guy until he passed on his own. Then I couldn’t get to a vet when he needed it at the end to let him out easy, so be assured you did the right thing and every decision has its up and down sides along the way.
And – AKM – I love your orange flower – but I am guessing your mother-in-law does not live in Alaska!
….that is, if this shot was taken recently, I mean to say……
Conners Mom~ Sooo sorry…
“Think of him still as the same,
I say, He is not dead, he is just away.”
Thank you for the picture – very spring’y!
The grifting ways of Hannity:
http://www.frumforum.com/lets-get-hannitized
It appears that birds of a Palin feather flock together.
@connorsmom, you have love, sympathy, hugs, thoughts, and prayers to help you carry on in this difficult time.
Health and peace.
Connorsmom, he is waiting at the Rainbow Bridge for you. I can imagine that when you bottle fed him that you cried that he would survive. Your hopes for him came true and he enjoyed 12 years of your devotion. He was a very lucky dog to have had you!
Muddpuppies
Thank you all who wrote here today. It was and is still very hard to believe he is no longer with me. I guess it is just never long enough to have a friend so close and loving. He was my soul and my heart. Lovesmydogs called me this morning and invited me to go over and help feed the rest of Colleen’s dogs tomorrow. I will do that and spend time loving each and everyone of them. Connor was true friend, he loved me and I knew it. I will miss him dearly. I don’t know if I will ever do this again but then I think what if there is another out there some where that needs the love and caring of someone who has so much to give. I will have to give it some time and space, but who knows what God may have in store for my life. It will never be another Connor….
Thank you all
connorsmom -
It seems to me that you and your furry friend were destined for each other, sharing unconditional love through many years no one expected him to have. When the time came to free him from his pain, you made the only decision that someone who truly loved him could and would make. I am certain that he is grateful for the gift of life you gave him as a pup and for the gift of peace when he needed it.
When I had to make the same decision several years ago with my 17-year-old cat, it was difficult, especially since the cat was a gift from my sister who died 2 years later. However, as I said goodbye at the animal hospital, she looked up at me and I KNOW she was thanking me for not being selfish and giving her what SHE needed. I believe that animals know when it’s time to go, but often they are dependent on us to help them along the way.
Hugs…
It will never be another Connor! Never ever! But there is more than one dog soul out there to steal your heart – someone is just waiting for you to be ready. In time. Connor’s memory is honored every time you pet and hug another dog! They are all in it together, I swear. They plot. They scheme. They catch you by surprise…
(((Connorsmom)))
I am so deeply sorry to hear this news. Love is truly forever as he will be in your heart always…off to join the Klennex brigade. Lovely and moving comments, Mudpups. Some of my fondest memories are of pets who have crossed the Rainbow Bridge, and loving them as I did taught my heart joy and love, lessons never to be forgotten. Your loving and devoted spirit is an inspiration.
Has anyone read “The Art of Racing In the Rain” by Garth Stein? It is the life of a dog and his family, told in the dog’s voice. Very interesting take. It takes him from puppyhood to old age and the end. Very moving and well written.
weaver57… yes i read that book and cried. then i bought the cd for my kids and they cried. it was so good i hope Connorsmom reads it and gains solace. Connorsmom be content and celebrate your loved one’s life. All is well with your pup.
I did read that book, and not without a lot of tears. Lovesmydogs let me read her copy. What a wonderful book. I would love to share one of my favorite pictures of Connor, can anyone tell me how to go about this?
Thanks
Kate
ConnorsMom – I hope it is just the grief talking and you do indeed find another forever friend. Every furry friend comes into our lives in different ways and each has their own distinct personalities so Connor can and never will be duplicated nor should he be, he was as unique as you and I are in the human world. It breaks my heart when I hear people say “they will never” or “may never” get another pet because the loss is so unbearable when they pass. We are all only but bits and pieces in moments of time and as the saying goes we can’t say when we are born nor when we will die but just how we will live and by all accounts you and Connor had some great times, magic moments, lots of love and long years together. I truly am sorry for your loss, I have walked in your shoes many times but I know in my heart the love they give along the way far out weights the grief of their passing. There is a line in a Harry Chapin song comes to mind often “If you try to look but you don’t touch then you won’t touch but you’ll never feel and if you don’t feel then you’ll never cry and if you don’t cry then you’ll never heal”. In the end you have to whats best for you but I hope after you’ve mourned the loss of your best bud you will find another furry friend to share your life with and the circle of life will continue. Again I’m so sorry for your loss.
Shadow’s Heart
I found your comment particularly moving and meaningful. Thank you.
Shadows heart…..nice. very nice.
I’m still working on a limited dial-up line that keeps dropping out every 20 minutes so I’m jumping in only for a moment or so but I just had to mention that there’s a Bill Moyers interview with Jane Goodall that’s running on PBS. Not to be missed! This is one of the best interviews I’ve ever listened to. ( and i’m sort of an addict for interviews )
Hitting the “send” button before I get tossed in to the internet ethers again!
Connorsmom: In almost all cases where we have a non-human friend (except for parrots), our friends are going to die before we do. In some ways, that’s a good thing — our loving friends don’t have to adapt to a world in which we are missing. But it means that we (the humans) usually have to bear the loss.
It’s always sad to lose someone you love, but if it’s after good life it’s easier to take. I’ve lost humans and critters both to normal old age and prematurely, and — at least in the short run — there’s no comparison. In the long run, you just miss them all.
In my personal experience, both the critters and the humans knew when it was time. With humans, you don’t always have the ability to act, but with critters the last courtesy you can show them is to let them go. It can be really hard, because we’re used to miracle cures, but if your friend says “Let me outta here”, the best thing you can do is to comply. And then cry. And then remember all the good parts.
LMD: “Her heart is broken. And I am a bit worried for her. She is blaming herself.”
Connorsmom:
Loss of a loved one can provoke feelings of intense anger…. because the loss damn well hurts and, on a more unconscious level, seems existentially unfair and punitive to both you and your loved one. Blaming yourself is the act of internalizing the anger you feel for the loss. Just recognizing this can often relieve that process but some people have to do more to externalize their anger. I found that a few episodes of wrathful shaking of fists at unknown deities and howling obscenities to the universe were helpful in dealing with the anger. To each his own, as they say.
Anger……It’s in there to varying degrees with different people and different losses:
“Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”
-Dylan Thomas (1951) written on the death of his father
My post may not be very soft and comforting but self-blame and guilt need a strong hand. Once dealt with, the gentler (but no less painful) processes of grieving can proceed more fluidly.
My sincere sympathy for the loss of your great friend.
Lee323
Thanks, I needed that, LMD called me this morning and offered to let me help her scoop poop for the rest of Colleens dogs, what a great friend! I will rant and rave on the way out there, then I will pet and hug and love on each one. The hurt is still there it will be for a very long time but the hole in my heart is not pouring forth like a waterfall today. It will never go away and as I sit and look at pictures and remember how much fun he had chasing that stupid ball my tears fall for the sorrow I feel but I am glad he is no longer hurting or embarrased because he can’t make it outside to take care of business. Slowly my heart is coming to realize that yes; I can make room for a new friend. Connor was a big guy 117 pounds, but there is still a small space in my heart that a new friend can begin to fill and make larger. I will always love him………
Connorsmom