Oyster Roundup – Cool Pope, Crazy Cruz & More
Gather round little ones! It’s time for a cool half-dozen slurpable
newsy bites on the half shell.
There goes that Pope again, giving Christians a good name. Sarah Palin noted, with some consternation that this Pope is sounding kind of “liberal” and her verdict is still out. While the former half-term governor of Alaska “does her homework” and figures out that Jesus was a liberal, the Pope turned his ire toward corruption. Take heed governments around the world and the Vatican. AwesomePope is not pleased with you, and says “the corrupt should be tied to a stone and thrown into the sea.” Say hi to the fishes most of Alaskan politicians!
Speaking of the fishes, there’s news reported by “WickedLocal.com”from Gloucester, Massachusetts – a venerated old fishing town from back when the Atlantic had them. They report the surprising news, that Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) and some Senator from Arkansas is actually out there urging congress to approve $150 million in fisheries disaster funding. What’s the deal with THAT?
U.S. Sen. Elizabeth Warren on Wednesday sent a letter with 37 other members of Congress, led by Senators Jack Reed, D-R.I., and Lisa Murkowski, R-Ark., urging congressional leadership to approve $150 million in fisheries disaster funding.
I don’t think Senator Murkowski has defected recently, so I’m guessing they’re so “wicked local” nobody thought the sudden advocacy for fisheries relief from a land-locked state was a little odd. Had they used the Google, they would have discovered that “AK” in fact is the state abbreviation for ALASKA. That’s OK. Next time you’re there, just call them Glue-Chester. They’ll love it.
And now, from the mind of the man who provided half the genetic material that made Ted Cruz, here’s a little thought about the atheist community.
“It’s a free country,” he said. “If these people need to practice their holy rites of atheism, they can do so, as long as they are in clearly-marked encampments far away from the rest of us…While they’re in their Heathen Zones, they’re free to dance naked around the fire, brand the mark of the Devil on their flesh or whatever else they want to do.”
Oh, and any heathen spawn that spring forth from the camp of the Devil need to be extracted immejately so they don’t absorb the wicked ways of their parents via scary demonic breast milk. And black people are “uninformed” and “deceived.” God Bless ‘Murrika.
The Great One?
For those who have been wondering, the transformation now appears to be complete. The former half-term governor, who wielded her Alaska cred at every possible opportunity now appears to have crossed a threshold. Last week, she tweeted that she was looking forward to talking to The Great One.
Really, Alaskans may be asking themselves. She’s going to be talking to Denali, the highest peak in North America? Well, um… OK. Communing with nature sometimes affects people like that I guess.
But, no. She went on. “I’m really looking forward to talking to The Great One, Mark Levin.” Yes, apparently the caustic, nasty, right wing talking head has now surpassed the other “Great One.” Congratulations Governor. You’re now officially an Arizonan.
Math is Hard
From the KTUU Facebook page, we bring you this little bit of awesome.
Don Young Will Never Read This Meme
Well, unless someone else turns on a computer, prints it out on to a piece of paper and shows it to him.