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February 26, 2018

Bedtime in Alaska – Daily Roundup

  Trees Sighted on the Lower Yukon! When Rep. Mike Kelly (R) from Fairbanks suggested that if people in rural villages were cold, they should just “cut wood,” people in villages like Emmonak  might have been scratching their heads, wondering about the secret location of all this wood.  But now,  Nunam Iqua resident Ann Strongheart has discovered trees right in the bustling heart of downtown Nunam Iqua.  I’ll bet that purple one will burn real good.  And if they run out of food again, and get hungry, I hear that there are lots of unicorns that hang out in the…

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Palin’s New Attorney General Pick – Caribou Ken?

From the moment Sarah Palin got dubbed “Caribou Barbie” back in September of ’08, I have thought of Lt. Governor Sean Parnell as “Caribou Ken”.  Why not Todd as Caribou Ken?  He’s too involved.  Ken was never part of the action…  He was just sort of a vague presence.  Kind of a shadowy blonde sidekick that never really did much except sit in the passenger seat of the pink convertible “dream car” and smile.  He has recently come out with his very own newsletter…I’ll have to dig it up and see what he’s been doing. But the latest rumors seem…

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Question of the Day from Drift River.

The legislative session in Juneau is over, and there’s sort of a “sigh of relief” vibe going around.  But some things just won’t go away.  There is still the question of oil.  Actually, there are many questions about oil.  The questions may not be as “provocative” as our governor in Arctic Cat leathers, or as entertaining as the filling of our vacant senate seat, but they are there, constantly, like a big dark spectre hanging over our heads.  Chevron has millions of gallons of crude oil stored in tanks sitting in between the slopes of an active volcano, and a large…

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Palin’s Future in the GOP.

After the deep, dreamless, recuperative shut-eye that was the inevitable result of the brutal Legislative session that ended yesterday, I awake to this on Politico: “Is Palin the Rev. Jackson of the GOP?” (balls up fists and rubs eyes furiously, blinks and checks again) “Is Palin the Rev. Jackson of the GOP?” Yup, I read that right. (runs to get coffee, comes back and reads) This article is a good one.  It talks about Palin’s role in the GOP, now that she’s proved herself to be completely unfit for the nation’s highest office.  Not only is it chock full of…

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Juneau Has a Senator, and the Agony is Over.

Yay. (clap……clap……clap) Juneau has a new senator. Don’t get me wrong.  I really am very happy that the insane drama of filling this empty seat is over.  I want to be able to summon some real enthusiasm.  I want to revel in the Dem’s spineliness in sticking to their guns, and not appointing Tim Grussendorf or Joe Nelson.  I want to jump up and down, and pop a cork, and spray champagne all over the capital city.  I want to congratulate the people of Juneau for getting a decent person to fill the seat, and finally give them representation. But frankly,…

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“Let Them Cut Wood” in the Forests of Western Alaska.

The legislative session ends today, but the fun continues right to the bitter end. Residents of rural Alaska were interested to note that Rep. Mike Kelly (R) from Fairbanks (who won the election by one vote), is irritated with the idea of appropriating state energy assistance money to rural Alaska and suggested that people shouldn’t rely on state aid, but instead should “cut wood.” If you are picturing the rural villages of Western Alaska with dwellings nestled among stands of large hardwood trees and dense foliage, you may now disavow yourself of that supposition.  In places like Emmonak, which has a few scrubby alders,…

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Swans and Snubs and Bears, Oh My!

Swan Song Alaska has two common species of swans; trumpeter swans and tundra swans.  The tundra swan is absolutely striking, with black bill and black feet.  It is also known as the “whistling swan” because of the noise its powerful slow wing beats make in flight.  To see a pair of tundra swans nesting on a misty lake, is absolutely, breathtakingly magical. A grim death toll of migrating tundra swans is again being observed at northern Idaho marshes contaminated with toxic mining waste. Thousands of swans headed for breeding grounds in Alaska stop each spring at the marshes along the Coeur…

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Sarah Palin Out of Touch and Out of Town.

Alaskans are picking themselves up and dusting themselves off today after dodging the bullet that was the appointment of Wayne Anthony Ross for Alaska’s Attorney General.  Relief is the word of the day. There were many factors leading to the demise of this nomination; the fact that he called gays “degenerates” in the Bar Newsletter, the condemnation by every major Native organization, the report of comments that can only be described as sexist and misogynistic at meetings and panel discussions, but the final nail in the coffin for several of those “nay” votes may have been the most awesome “gotcha” moment…

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Texas Has Stolen Our Meme, and This Cannot Stand.

Heeeeey.  we’re the ones who are supposed to have the disturbing secessionist tendencies. That’s our meme! Who does this guy think he is? “Texas is a unique place. When we came into the union in 1845, one of the issues was that we would be able to leave if we decided to do that. My hope is that America, and Washington in particular, pays attention. There’s a lot of different scenarios. We’ve got a great union. There’s absolutely no reason to dissolve it. But if Washington continues to thumb their nose at the American people, you know, who knows what…

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So, if Gays are Lima Beans, What are Socialists?

OK, we’ve heard the “gays are lima beans” analogy from Attorney General nominee Wayne Anthony Ross. Now, here’s another odd food analogy from Congressman Don Young at the “Tea Party” in Wasilla yesterday.  Apparently socialists are consomme. And what the heck is “interpaneurspiship”? Don Young says socialism has never worked, because he was raised that way.  I guess he’s never used the library, or the roads, or the fire department, or the police, or went to public school.

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