My Twitter Feed

June 21, 2018

President Trump Wants Palin in Cabinet

I’d like Sarah Palin to be in a cabinet too – preferably one that is soundproof. But, we don’t always get what we want. Loudmouth fake political celebrity, and bad hairpiece-wearing reality TV star Donald Trump is running for office. And he’d love to have loudmouth fake political celebrity, and bad hairpiece-wearing reality TV star Sarah Palin in his cabinet in the unlikely event he is elected President of the United States. When you think about it, it’s really amazing these two haven’t connected long before now. I mean, ok, there was that awkward first date where they both ate…

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Click Bishop Takes a Page from Palin – Reads Dr. Seuss

Republican Senator Click Bishop, whose district covers land from Fairbanks to Valdez took a page from Sarah Palin and read a story by Dr. Seuss to the Alaska State Senate. Well, it wasn’t quite a Dr. Seuss original – more of a revision of Seuss’ Green Eggs and Ham seen through the filter of government overreach. Unlike Half-Term Palin’s teleprompter read at CPAC last year (when she held the book as a prop), Click seems to have actually written the words down in a copy of Green Eggs and Ham. I’m hoping that he bought a new copy and didn’t ruin one of from his grandkids….

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Giant Weed Monster! RUN!

Soon voters will decide whether to regulate marijuana like alcohol in Alaska. Fortunately, Alaska Robotics News in Juneau has reporters on the scene in Seattle and Denver to tell us like what the heck is going on, man? Oh, and if you’re going out can you pick up some Funyuns? Awesome end of the world snack, dude.

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Palin Responds to Face Punching

  Many of us have sat, head hung low, as we’ve gotten a phone call from school because our little angel was being less than angelic. We tell ourselves that this is a teaching moment. We explain that of course, we don’t condone their actions, and this won’t happen again. We urge our progeny to fess up, to accept the consequences of their actions, and to make amends to the aggrieved party. Two weeks after the birthday party in Anchorage which resulted in the Palin family’s enthusiastic participation in a giant fist fight, Sarah Palin has finally done what any contrite mother…

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Alaska Slugfest!

What is it about us Alaskans that we just can’t seem to avoid a good slug fest? We even had one at Mudflats Central this afternoon. When the rain stopped, everything was going really well. I was hanging out with the guests watching them check out the welcome mat, and admire the slate. You really couldn’t have asked for a more relaxed and cordial gathering… when suddenly an attractive but obnoxious gang of uninvited thugs arrived from the north. There was screeching and squawking, and preening of feathers – the whole family. It just made you want to plug your ears…

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Palin Streetbrawl Gear

Available in a ladies’ ringer tee and a men’s long-sleeve raglan, The Bristol Palin Boxing Academy shirt lets you show your support for the home team! Perfect attire for that hung-over brunch at Snow City Café. Features Mudflats logo on the front. Ladies’ “Bristol Palin Boxing Academy” Ringer Tee by MudflatsStore Men’s “Bristol Palin Boxing Academy” long-sleeve by MudflatsStore Or for an all-up-front style, choose the classic panorama of the Palin Family Brawl, featuring Bristol, Todd, Track, Sarah and the whole drunken rumpus, available in a variety of colors in short and long-sleeved styles. Great loungewear for recovery day while…

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We Demand Stupid

No one ever lost money underestimating the intelligence of the American public. —H.L. Mencken Poor Ezra Klein. When the confines of the Washington Post could no longer contain his massive intellect, his new Vox venture had grand aspirations of cerebral, substantive policy coverage (because what MSNBC regular doesn’t brag of being a “wonk” or a “geek?”). It took breathtakingly little time since its launch for Vox to realize that this isn’t what generates web traffic and social media shares. I know this because there were three separate Vox stories about the MTV Video Music Awards in my Facebook feed this…

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Awkward Kid Explains Oil Taxes

Totally confused by Prop 1 on Tuesday’s ballot, or just want to see an awkward kid totally own the oil companies. Either way, here’s a coffee break treat! We love this kid. And this video (especially the sign part). The oil companies have spent millions of dollars to confuse you, and make you think it’s all just sooooo complicated. It’s actually not that hard to figure this whole thing out. This kid sure did. The numbers are close, Alaskans. And to keep from sending our treasury to big fancy glass offices in Houston, and London, we need to do one…

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Robin Williams on Sarah Palin

So many have eulogized Robin Williams more eloquently that we could. But we thought the best send-off would ultimately be with laughter. Nobody could do it like Williams, with his unique brand of irreverence and lightning wit. Here he pillories Sarah Palin, the Clintons, and more. Definitely not safe for work, and definitely funny. Thanks for the laughs, sir. And rest in peace. “And if you want comedy, there is always Sarah Palin. God bless. She is wonderful. Sarah is a self-opening piñata. She’s a gift.”

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“Synchronized” 5th Graders (Open Thread)

A group of fifth grade boys have gone viral after pretending to be synchronized swimmers in their middle school talent show. Enjoy! We’ve not put up an open thread in a while, so feel free to comment with whatever in today’s news headlines is of interest, concern or bemusement to you.

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