A Six-pack of Stupid. Happy Monday!
It’s Monday, so we thought we’d start your week off like this. Here’s a compendium of stupidity from across the nation. Full stories are linked in the titles. Oh, Florida… In an effort to ban all internet cafés (because why wouldn’t you), it seems that the hastily thrown together Florida legislation will make all cell phones, tablets, laptops, and every 40-pound PC owned by every retiree in the state illegal, because apparently they are the same as slot machines. You just know it’s only a matter of time before some red southern state is going to slip up and ban…
Bigot Bullets – It’s a thing.
So what do you get for the racist gun nut that has everything? Pork laced bullets. Yes. This is a thing now. According to the HuffPost, these lovely bits of ammunition are laced with pork paint. South Fork Industries, based in Dalton Gardens, Idaho, claims its ammunition, called Jihawg Ammo, is a “defensive deterrent to those who violently act in the name of Islam.” The bullets are coated in pork-infused paint, which the company states makes the ammo “haram,” or unclean, and therefore will keep a Muslim who’s shot with one of the bullets from entering paradise. “With Jihawg Ammo,…
“Racist Dentist” is New GOP Vice Chair
The Alaska Republican Party has been trying desperately to get its house in order while undergoing a civil war. And they’ve been doing just about as well as you might expect. The latest brilliant strategy move was voting in the man known as the “racist dentist” to hold the #2 spot in the Republican Party of Alaska. A coup of sorts took place when long time party chair Randy Ruedrich retired. The Ron Paul/Tea Party crowd overtook the convention and installed newcomer Russ Millette as Chair. The old guard panicked and rerouted the treasure chest to a Republican group in…
‘Global Warning My Gluteus Maximus’ Says Palin
You knew this was coming. Alaska is experiencing insane weather anomalies. Last year Southcentral Alaska had its snowiest winter on record. This year, it’s the longest snow season, at 231 days and counting. So it’s not surprising some idiot on Facebook is going to pipe up and say, “Still believe in ‘global warming?’” But I actually didn’t expect to hear it from Sarah Palin, even though she’s repeatedly earned the title of Alaska’s newest village idiot. Palin, you see, during her very brief tenure as Alaska’s governor, not only acknowledged climate change, but actually tried to do something about it….
The Search for Spring – Day 2
Springquest. Day 2. I don’t think I have the discipline to do one of those 365 day photo projects. So, this one will be only until I feel that I’ve brought you, gentle reader, and me, raving lunatic, successfully to springtime. “But you do not sound like a raving lunatic,” you may be thinking. The reason you think that is because you did not see me this morning, as I sat in my usual spot on the loveseat at Mudflats Central, with my usual cup of coffee, looking up from my laptop out the window to see this. Uh-huh. Yeah….
The Good We Can Do
Media saturation and outrage fatigue. That’s the kind of week it’s been. There were so many stories — from all over the country and world in such terrible detail. There seemed nothing to do but watch as horror after horror unfolded. When was the last time I heard “Breaking: Good News?” As summer draws near, we watched the U.S. Senate — including both of our senators — fail the victims of past and future gun massacres. On Patriot’s Day blood spilled on the streets of Boston, limbs lost, lives lost. We saw a deadly explosion at a fertilizer plant in…
The View from Juneau
An old saying goes something like this, “We hate in others what we hate in ourselves.” I don’t think I’ve seen a better example of that than this 28th legislative session. I flew to Juneau to watch the last days of the session for myself. Home in Anchorage, I spend a remarkable amount of time watching Gavel to Gavel – I even Tivo it. But the cameras don’t show what’s really going on in the Capitol, restaurants and bars; they don’t show the lobbyists following lawmakers into the bathroom or to the smoking porch. (I have to wonder whether the…
Giessel Says Scrutinize Foreign Students
Looks like another piece of legislation is coming from the Xenophobe caucus. Rep. Bob Lynn (R-Anch) has proposed HB1, which will basically turn the DMV into a branch of the Immigration and Naturalization Service, and require extra work for multiple state agencies who will now have to process drivers licenses more frequently, attempt to know law that is not their job; and create a bunch of hassle for foreign students in our university system. Yes, this isn’t just any nefarious terrorist threat, this is students. Let’s hear from Cathy Giessel (R-Anch/Turnagain), who proudly never had any of her children in…
Don Young “We used to hire wetbacks.”
Congressman for all Alaska Don Young is known for his verbal gaffes. The Ear just had a nice summation for the Congressman’s 40th Anniversary in office: 40 years of the mind-bending wit and wisdom we so love. Who can forget “Pribilof’s dog,” “bladderdash” and the “money we get is a piddlance of the total bill.” Well we remember his claim that he convinced his wife to get a “monogram” (you know, to prevent breast cancer). And he once reported replacing copper piping in his home with inexpensive “PCP pipe” (Ear is pretty sure he meant PVC pipe; if not,…
AO37:The Bill Remains the Same
Friday was billed as the last Working Group on Ordinance 37: “An Ordinance Amending Anchorage Municipal Code Chapter 3.70, Employee Relations, With Comprehensive Updates Securing Long Term Viability and Financial Stability of Employee and Labor Relations.” In other words, an ordinance established to decrease union contracts and establish a process called “managed competition” — a program through which it is easier to outsource various job functions within the Municipality. (See: “ALEC” legislation across the nation). In spite of efforts by Assembly Members Gray-Jackson, Traini, Flynn and Honeman to potentially scrap this ordinance and start over with employee and community participation,…