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July 18, 2018

Alaska… You Crazy! Election Recap

On election night, one state in the nation voted to legalize marijuana, raise the minimum wage, and add an extra level of environmental protection for sensitive ecosystems facing development. It’s largest city also voted to overturn an anti-labor ordinance which was the brain child of a Mayor (running as a Republican for Lt. Governor) who appears to be about to go down in flames to a non-partisan gubernatorial ticket. That’s like a cool, edgy progressive place to live, right? What if I told you that this very same state has elected by a comfortable margin, a majority in the legislature…

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EXCLUSIVE Don Young Caption Contest

  Of course it’s EXCLUSIVE. You think just anyone gets their mitts on a photo of the longest serving member of Congress smoking a cigar on a boat, seemingly about to menace a rubber panda man with a shotgun? And yes. This is real. It was taken this summer, and there is no photoshopping. Let’s be serious. If we were going to make up a photo with Don Young in it, even we wouldn’t have come up with this.  And now… it’s all yours. Leave your caption in the comments, and we’ll meme the best ones.

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Purgatory Will Turn You Vegan. Apparently.

And now this, from the Palin Channel, which clearly has not raised enough money for speech writers. Or teleprompters. Or some guy making cue cards with a Sharpie. Luckily, they’ve been able to scrape up enough for a fake tree, and a pile of leather-bound books which were put in front of her so maybe now she has to read them, a lacquered photograph of a flag, and a ring of keys for a house belonging to a race of giants. Gravitas. That’s what that is. The ex-half-governor must have been feeling confident this day, because she decided to take…

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Eric Cantor Got “Joe Millered” by Tea Party

Anyone in Alaska watching Tuesday’s primary shocker in Virginia unfold couldn’t help but draw comparisons to the Senate race in 2010. That year, Tea Party candidate Joe Miller set the Republican establishment back on its heels with a victory shocker over incumbent Republican Lisa Murkowski. Democrats scrambled while institutional Republicans, mouths agape, tried to comprehend what had just happened. On Tuesday in Virginia, Dave Brat, an underfunded Tea Party candidate cleaned the clock of the 7-term Republican incumbent House Majority Leader Eric Cantor by double digits. Brat had been predicted to lose by a wide margin. By many accounts Cantor…

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GOP Senator – Birth Control Irresponsible

I had a plan to write a column that was going to make the Anchorage municipal elections coming up to be the sexiest most riveting thing you’ve ever read. Then someone did something stupid in Juneau, so you’ll have to wait a week while I sort this doofus out. First, the reporting on Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders from Kyle Hopkins and Marc Lester for the Anchorage Daily News has been incredible. Disturbing, and incredibly needed. Two percent of children born in Alaska have FASD. We need solutions and education. Sadly, we have a “think tank” formed by Sen. Pete Kelly…

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Palin’s Book & My Xmas Pilgrimage to Wasilla

Christmas Eve was a bitter night. Despite my best efforts, I knew it wasn’t going to happen. I was not going to make it through blogging all of Sarah Palin’s Christmas book, Good Tidings and Great Joy, before the big day. There just wasn’t enough eggnog in the world to keep up the pace. I had debated at one point handling this predicament like that children’s hide-and-seek trick, where they’re supposed to count to a hundred before they come find you. “One, two, skip a few, ninety-nine, one hundred!” Chapter 1, almost done, skip the crap, I’m fin-ished! But I…

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Marketing Fails, UK Edition

Clearly feeling overlooked in our recent  “marketing fails” coverage, British football club Manchester United decided that what would best accompany its already big brotherish “new order” marketing tag is a logo evocative of a swastika. History buffs may recall a certain someone calling for a “European New Order” in 1941. United spokesman David Sternberg has issued a statement acknowledging that “the creative is completely inappropriate; we apologise unreservedly and are taking appropriate internal action.” Regardless of whether “the creative” being thrown under the bus is an ad agency or an internal marketing team, don’t people up the organizational food chain in…

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Parnell Tells Jewell, “Call my people.”

Alaska Governor Sean Parnell has earned himself a reputation for not being very assertive, a bit of a pushover if you will. Typically, this criticism comes from the governor’s own party. Even Alaska’s lone Congressman has referred to him as a “zero” on more than one occasion. That, coupled with the fact that it is totally en vogue to bash every facet of the federal government, might explain Governor Parnell’s latest bout of nastygrams sent to federal agencies. Last week, the day prior to the end of the federal government shutdown, Governor Parnell sent Interior Secretary Sally Jewell a letter. The…

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Domino’s Apologizes to Alaska – Is it Enough?

BREAKING: The War on Halibut is heating up. Domino’s Pizza has sent an apology for offense to the state of Alaska, and the fishing industry as a whole over their new “Powered by Pizza” ad campaign that disparages Alaska’s beloved halibut. The furor in Alaska began whenThe Mudflats weighed in (HERE) after seeing the Domino’s TV commercial which claims “no one ever had a world-changing idea over halibut. No way,” as an actor spits halibut out of his mouth and on to the plate in disgust. Alaskans across the board were angered by the slight to our tasty and beloved…

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Domino’s Pizza Trashes Alaska Seafood

Why do you hate Alaska, Domino’s pizza? The new “Powered by Pizza” ad campaign for Domino’s Pizza asserts that good ideas and American innovation begin over pizza. It’s the food of brainstorming sessions, cutting-edge garage bands, and geeky future startup pioneers. Domino’s isn’t really my thing, but it’s a clever, upbeat sort of ad—something a little different, and inoffensive. Or so I thought.  They seem to have taken a cue from our former half-term governor who isn’t content to simply promote her own ideas, but must also create a fictitious “evildoer” to knock down in the process. And we, on…

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