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September 17, 2021

Ryan Steps into Palin’s Red Pumps

Oh, dear. She’s been waiting by the window and watching the mailman every day – pressing her little nose against the glass, and looking for that special envelope inviting her to the dance. And every day, he passes her by.

And we’ve been watching her watch the mailman pass her by, and stand in front of the mirror, practicing her speech. And finally, we’ve all come to the same realization. Sarah didn’t get invited to speak at the Republican convention.

After some private pillow-screaming, and plate smashing, and hair-pulling, she’s put on a brave face. You see, she really didn’t want to speak anyway, and she’s happy to let someone new have the spotlight.

And that speech she wrote? Well, it was really meant to be a Facebook status update, anyway. So there. And take THAT, California, you “brothel of environmentalists, lawyers, public-sector unions and legislative bums.”

Palin told Fox News’ Greta Van Susteren. “This year is a good opportunity for other voices to speak at the convention and I’m excited to hear them.” In other words, “I hate you I hate you I hate you!”

According to RNC Chair Reince Priebus, she may be hearing those other voices, but it won’t be from the convention itself. It appears that she’s not even planning to attend. In a statement to Buzzfeed, Priebus said, “Gov. Palin has been a force in our party and while I am disappointed she won’t be in Tampa I know she will continue to be actively engaged in replacing Barack Obama,” he said.

And so, now Paul Ryan steps up and tries to fill Palin’s red, size 7 Naughty Monkey pumps. It’s a tight fit. No one can dispute that Ryan has more experience in government (albeit not the formerly mandated executive experience), and that Ryan is smart (albeit diabolical), and has an actual plan (albeit draconian). But Ryan was chosen for exactly the same reason as Palin – to be a political Hail Mary to win the election for Romney, and not a measured selection who could take over on Day 1, should Romney choke on a quail egg.

Paul Ryan is a cynical and calculated pick to energize the base. It’s red meat for dinner, and eye candy for dessert on the other side of the aisle, folks. That’s what they ordered last time, and they seemed to like it. And I think, overall, that worked out pretty well.





46 Responses to “Ryan Steps into Palin’s Red Pumps”
  1. Zyxomma says:

    Daily Koss assembled newspaper headlines reacting to the Vampire pick from swing state Florida:

    When I saw them, I could see Tim Russert, of blessed memory, with his whiteboard, saying, “Florida, Florida, Florida.”

    • Lacy Lady says:

      I hope my Republican friend that lives in Florida reads all of these news stories!!!!
      I would love to “rub it in”, but we have both agreed to not send any political stuff to one another.

  2. Lacy Lady says:

    More about Paul Ryan to give us all chills.
    I heard on CNN that his wife is also rich and received another $2 million recently.
    This man is one scary dude!

    • Simple Mind says:

      Yep, Ryan made his money the old-fashioned way – he married into it. Of course, his boss, Mittens, inherited his fortune, so in comparison I guess Ryan at least had to make some effort for his.

  3. mike from iowa says:

    Breaking news-Taking a cue from Taylor Swift’s new album “Red”,Ayn Rand announced this very day she and Paul Ryan have broken up and will never get back together again and again and again. The announcement was made because of potential voter backlash aimed at Rand since she was not sufficiently “flip-floppy” like Mittens. I personally thought the “Red” album mention was a nice touch since Ms Rand was an avowed Commie of the first stripe later in her life and now she is deceased,her paramours are jumping ship like rats. Paul Ryan,who was bound and gagged by Willard’s security forces so he couldn’t publicly disavow whatever he is supposed to agree with,was unavailable for comment. From her secluded fortress somewhere near Lake Lucille,the jilted almost,also-ran quitter had trhis to say,except on one cared enough to show up. I hate when that happens. I didn’t bother to get any film,no one would believe it anyway. It is nearly time for an hour of the replacement Lone Ranger and Tonto,Clayton Moore was on strike in year two of the three year series and this other Lone Ranger dude is taller and talks funny than the original. Stay tuned to discover whether a vampire cum vulture capitalist can find luv without his former mentor who is decidedly dead.

  4. LoveMyDogs says:

    This man scares me so much that I can barely speak. I am 52 going on 53. I have paid into SS and Medicare for my entire life. I had an IRA that got hammered in 2008 because it is at the mercy of Wall Street (no 401Ks or pensions from any of the jobs that I have ever had) so I can tell you exactly what privatizing SS can get you. My health insurance is tied to my husband’s job. He may be forced to retire at age 65. I cannot crawl around on the floor with little kids (as my job as a pediatric PT requires) until I am 70. There are no guarantees about anyone’s health except that it will naturally devolve as we get older. Perhaps we are living too long and this is just a way to make sure that we will no longer do so. Without SS and Medicare I can NEVER quit working and enjoy any kind of “retirement” without losing everything that we have worked hard to achieve. The upside is that I know I will lose weight….can’t abide the smell of cat food.

    Aside from the future fear factor on a personal level, there is always the outright war on women’s rights, the war-mongering and the denial of climate change as well as the corporatist theocracy that Romney/Ryan stand behind. SS and Medicare might not be a problem if we destroy our planet first.

    • You are exactly in the postion that Romney and Ryan don’t talk about. They keep saying that anyone 55 or older doesn’t have to worry. Well, what does that mean for everyone who is 54 and younger? Why aren’t they being asked that question? I sometimes wonder what journalism students are being taught now. It used to be that they not only asked hard questions, but they knew how and when to ask a follow up question or knew that if a question was side-stepped or not answered, they had to rephrase the question, sometimes more than once until they actually got an answer.

  5. Lacy Lady says:

    I just signed this petition. As far as I know, we still have FREEDOM of religion.

  6. Zyxomma says:

    Great article by Dean Baker:

    “By contrast, Representative Ryan has an extreme right-wing agenda that predates both Great Society and the New Deal. He has put forward plans that would cut and privatize both Social Security and Medicare. He has also called for essentially zeroing out most categories of federal spending.”

    “He has also never spoken up against the professional and licensing restrictions that protect doctors in the United States from international competition. As a result of these protectionist barriers we pay our doctors more than twice as much as what doctors earn in Western Europe. If free trade lowered doctors pay to Western European levels it would be equivalent to a tax cut of $1,200 a year for an average family of four.

    “It possible to cite many other government interventions along similar lines that never seemed to bother Representative Ryan. In other words, Representative Ryan doesn’t have any principled objections to government interferences in the market, even when this interference leads to enormous inefficiency, as is the case with too-big-to-fail banks or patent protection for prescription drugs.”

  7. Zyxomma says:

    Here’s Robert Reich contrasting the plans of our president with those of the veep-wannabe re Medicare:

    Well worth reading, IMO.

  8. Lacy Lady says:

    Would you say this was inside trading?
    Think Martha Stewart went to prison—–and it was her broker, if I remember, that did the trading.

  9. AKblue says:

    Yesterday I heard there has been no bump in Romney’s poll numbers since picking Ryan.

  10. HoboJohn says:

    As McCain learned and now Romney will be taught…..

    Going to the Hail Mary pass has a better chance of success when you’re on solid footing with Jesus and his teachings,

  11. HoboJohn says:

    He is singing the same failure of trickle down economics. The rich and global corporation should pay no taxes. Like Sarah Palin he was happy to spend the Treasury on roads to nowhere. Ryan rubber stamped no-bid contracts, unfunded wars, refused to provide over-site to military expenditures. Has everyone forgotten Cheney repeatedly saying deficits don’t matter. And of course they don’ when the money is funneled into your own specials interests and it is being spent like a drunken sailor on shore leave Like Palin the hypocrisy is sickening. And Paul’s Rayan’s wife was a DC lobbyist. Quite the homemaker. He want to clean up DC. Of course by this he means clean up all the money on K-Street and put it in his parties and criminal cronies pockets.

    2020 is game over for the planet, vote Dr Jill Stein or die!

    • EatWildFish says:

      And Ryan was one of the biggest backers of the Iraq war — happy to send young Americans off to a bogus war that he avoided, although he was of age to enlist. Likewise, Romney was a Viet Nam supporter, then fled to France to avoid going himself. And none of his five strapping sons has served in the military.

      That is why both men are such war hawks – to cover their own cowardice.

  12. slipstream says:

    Reince Priebus is a great name for a republican!

    Reince Priebus would also be a great name for an inflammation of the ileus.

    Okay, that’s the same thing, but still . . . whatta name!

  13. Alaska Pi says:

    oh my. i can’t take the image .
    that smarmy lil rand as eye candy? eccck. ecccckkk. ecccckkkk.

  14. COalmostNative says:

    Ryan has sponsored and passed 2 bills during his 13 years in Congress, such a strong record of accomplishment. Bipartisan? The one Democrat reputed Ryan’s statement that his budget plan has bipartisan support- he said they did a policy paper together, and he does not support Ryan’s budget plans.

    Foreign policy experience? Nada. How about business experience? Only if his 8 months helping in the family business counts…

    What a veep candidate-

    • Alaska Pi says:

      yup- renamed a post office and got an excise tax lowered… woop-tee-doo.

      • beth. says:

        He didn’t just get “an excise tax lowered”, he, true to GOTP form, had a law passed that created an advantage for the (more) wealthy.

        Prior to his bill, shafts (/arrows for bow hunting –one of his hobbies– and some of the tips used on them) were taxed 12.4% of the purchase price. A $10 shaft, therefore, was taxed (10 x 12.4%) $1.24; a $20 shaft was taxed $2.48; a $40 shaft was taxed $4.96, etc., making the total price for each, $11.24, $22.48, and $44.96, respectively.****

        He got it so each shaft, instead, is taxed a flat 34-cents. Period. The total per shaft (with tax), then, is: $10.34, $20.34, and $40.34, etc., respectively. Sounds good, no?

        Thing is, the poor soul who can only afford a $10 shaft is saving all of $0.90. If the person can afford a $20 shaft, the savings is $2.14. The $40 person saves $4.62.

        So, if my math is right, every 11th shaft for the $10-shafters, would, essentially, be ‘free’ (if they put their 90-cents ‘savings’ back into more $10 shafts.) For the $20 buyers, every 9th, would be. For the $40 buyers, every 8th-ish (8.66) would be.

        Once again, advantage: wealth(ier)….the poor(er) are, literally, getting the shaft *but* are paying, proportionally, more for the privilege.

        I maintain he is dangerous in a way that SP never was — he can throw numbers around and convince people that his fiscal ideas are sound, and he can ‘authoritatively’ sound as if he’ll be ‘saving’ the economy with them. He’s nothing more than a rain-maker, though. If Ryan’s “Road to Prosperity” budget plan is anything like his bill for arrows/shafts –and it is–, it’s full of some mighty fancy-work bs and is shot through with some mighty stinky ‘stuff’. beth.

        ****arrows/shafts are usually sold in groups of 12. If they were sold individually, out of that dozen-grouping, though, the cost/savings would be about the same as above. b.

        • Alaska Pi says:

          The excise tax is one which funds game management for hunting- a user-fee of sorts.
          So- it is a special interest piece of legislation of a minor sort in the end.
          It is hard for me to understand how different hunting is away from here , how much of it is for sport and not to fill freezers and pantries, but it is not hard to understand that funding for game management on public lands must include those who take game.
          So- woop-tee-do for Mr Ryan for his special interest legislation. We can argue about hunting and bad game management policies and the like but I think it wrong to relieve the user of the public resource of their responsibility to help pay for that which supports their activity. So I think it is less a matter of rewarding those with money than yet another starve-the-beast dealie.
          I grew up in a home where the game on the table came from arrows my father made. During the winter, his shop was full of shafts in various stages of completion. He paid for them by making better bowstrings for recurves than any manufacturer did and selling them to other hunters.

          • beth. says:

            To my mind, that the ‘savings’/difference between the 12.4% abd the 34-cent tax means that much less for resource management, makes it that much worse.

            Once again, the burden of supporting the resource falls disproportionately on the poor(er). The wealthy(/ier) are paying the same amount to ‘use’ the resource for their sport/hobby, as is the less wealthy(/ier), If the resouce was one that was necessary for life and/or comfort, like water and/or heating oil and/or gasoline, or some such, that would be one thing…everyone pay the same — fair enough. It isn’t, though; it’s, for the most part, a hobby. Particularily for those who have more ‘disposable’ money, can purchase food with that money, and do not have to suppliment their food-budget by hunting for meat from ‘the wild’ or face the very real prospect of going hungry.

            Granted, it could be argued that the wealthy(/ier) have already paid more money to use the resource…through their paying more fed and/or state taxes. Only flaw in that, though, is, as we’ve all seen, the wealthy(/ier) pay proportionately less in state and fed taxes than do the poor(er).

            Accch….I guess I’ll just have to hit the lottery so I, too, can take advantage of all the grand plans the GOTPers AKA Ayn Randers have in mind for us. Wish me luck! beth.

      • Kath the Scrappy says:

        I believe that excise tax to be lowered was on wooden arrows (seriously) since Ryan is an archery buff.

  15. Blueeyes7594 says:

    I don’t get Paul wanting to dismantle Social Security when he received Survivors benefits after his father died. My son and I receive Survivior benefits because of my husband’s passing. That would hurt a whole lot of people if he does what he wants to do to Social Security. Why is it okay for him to receive benefits but not anyone else?

    • Deni says:

      Paul Ryan got his. He doesn’t care if you get yours. It’s the republican way.

    • Sister A says:

      I was a recipient of survivor’s benefits myself as a child, and they made a big difference, particularly as my mom was getting back on her feet. I can’t understand not wishing the same on anyone in similar circumstances. What a cold-hearted soul he must be, underneath his warm, clever persona.

      • I was in a similar situation after my dad died when I was 10. I just don’t understand what goes on in the mind of a person who is so uncaring about other people. I agree that he is a “cold-hearted soul” – what a good description- but I don’t find him warm or clever. Sneaky, lying, calculating would be more like it.

    • fishingmamma says:

      You are right – and nobody is asking Ryan what will happen to those kids recieving benefits. Not only did my son recieve benefits after his dad’s death, I was required to report what I did with the money to support him, how much I set aside in savingsfor him, and when I released the money to him.

  16. Simple Mind says:

    Yes, Ryan is smart and has some Washington experience. (Never was a part-time, small town mayor, though.) I disagree that he has a plan. The so-called Ryan Plan, ostentatiously titled the “Path to Prosperity”, does have a detailed plan to end Medicare and Medicaid. After that, things get real vague. Essentially, he’d cut alot of spending from somewhere, but not the military. He’d lower top-end tax rates and eliminate corporate taxes. Same old baloney the Republicans have been peddling (but not doing) for decades. Ryan used to spend alot of time praising Ayn Rand and describing his devotion to her philosophy until he realized that being a Rand disciple probably wasn’t going to cut it with the majority of voters who might take exception to being called parasites sponging off the talents of the corporate producers like Bain Capital. (Now Ryan says his model has changed to Thomas Aquinas.) Ryan has no obvious foreign policy experience, expertise or positions to add to Romney’s bumbling on his latest tour. Given Ryan’s vote in favor of an East Berlin-style wall along the Mexican border and his opposition to the DREAM Act, the choice of Ryan looks like Romney is essentially punting the Latino vote. Romney’s pick has, I think, great similarities to the McCain choice of Palin. It is an “all or nothing” Hail Mary. Since’s Ryan’s sole issue is the economy, this choice is a sign that Romney means to put all his chips on that single issue and hope that he can convince a majority of voters that they should just give all their money to their corporate betters and well ….. it gets kind of vague after that.

    • NMJ says:

      I remember watching Ryan get booed and heckled off the stage in a townhall in his own district when he tried to explain his budget, and couldn’t come up with any reasonable answer to all the questions about Medicare.

  17. Lacy Lady says:

    Rommney and his side-kick keep talking about gutting medicare and changing soc Sec, yet they have no fear about either for them and their families. Ryan will have a reitirement fund—paid for by Us –the American people and also health insur that sometimes pays for a million dollar heart, should he ever need one. To hell with the rest of us.
    All I hear is the debt. They never say that the Wars put us there—-deep in dept. Afganistan costing $2 billion a week , plus the lost of life of our men and women in service. And who started these wars that were never paid fo????? DUH!!!
    And what was the price for the War in Iraq???? And what did we gain? Are we still looking for those hidden weapons?
    I heard that Ryan is to speak at the Iowa State Fair. I oppose political speakers at our fair—–both parties.
    That is not what a State Fair is all about. Why should our great Iowa 4-H kids take a back seat to politicians?

  18. zyggy says:

    I wish I was a fly on the wall in Palin’s house when the news came back to her she wasn’t needed at the convention.

  19. outofmanyweareone says:

    Why are his eyes so red?

    • mike from iowa says:

      As a vampire,he is homed in our jugulars. When a vampire bares its fangs,does it pay to assume he is smiling?

  20. Bev says:

    What worries me about Ryan is that he appeals to the tea party people and those are the ones who pushed the Repugs to a win in 2010….no way do we need two one percenters in the whitehouse so we need to get Obama another 4 years.

  21. Martha Unalaska Yard Sign says:

    I think it’s more like Ryan is pumping into Palin’s steps! Her missteps that is.

  22. EatWildFish says:

    Poor, poor $arah … $he is all botoxed and has her big boob implants on her anorexic body – and nowhere to go! “I don’t wanna go to yer dumb ole party anyways,” sez the Quitter.

    Will $he still show up in Tampa at her strip mall hole in the wall – maybe sellin’ her ghostwritten books and tacky Superman tshirts — you know $he can’t pass up the opp for some facetime on a roving tv camera!

    The $hilla from Wasilla has become the poster child for everything NOT to pick in a running mate and that is how $he will be remembered.

    How does it feel to be thrown to the curb, Lo$er? Bwhahahahahahahhhaaa

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