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Palin for Senate? Buckle up, Alaska.

palinak

A friend of mine answered his phone this week with, “Palin for Senate.”

I gasped before I laughed.

Oh, it’s easy to make jokes about the former half-term governor’s announcement that she’s considering running against Senator Mark Begich in 2014.

“Senator Palin 2014 – 2015 ½!” I’d guess the late night joke writers have already contributed to her PAC.

Christine Pelosi (yes, her mom is famous) tweeted, “With Palin exploring a Senate run, It’s Christmas in July for @shannynmoore.”

It’s true. If it weren’t for Sarah Palin, you probably wouldn’t be reading my column. I wouldn’t have met a long-lost cousin, been flown to New York City to be on national TV, or met a lot of folks I’ve admired for years. Thanks, Sarah. I mean that.

But I’d rather go fishing than have Christmas in July.

Sen. Begich questioned her residency. She spends a lot of time at her home in Arizona. She quit. She’s free to move about the country. I called the Permanent Fund office and asked what the last year she applied for a check: 2011, for the year 2010. I know, I know, she has gobs of money and maybe just didn’t need it. Alaskans aren’t required to file for the PFD but it seems like it’s one of the few bipartisan things we enjoy.

She and her family paid a lot for the money she has.

Trust me, a Palin run for Senate would create, again, a whole cottage industry for Alaska. The national media would pour in and the face of the Republican party nationally would be hers. We’d become a frontline battlefield in a midterm election. Media groups are salivating. There will be more money flowing out of campaign troughs than air time and ad pages to buy. America’s heartland would see an exodus of campers full of Palinistas heading north to be prayer warriors and boots on the ground for their hero.

The debates. Really? I just don’t think I can take the word salad she spouts.

It’s already started.

Begich tweeted, “I’d be happy to compare my record of fighting for #Alaska w/ @SarahPalinUSA but it wouldn’t seem fair since she never finished the job. -MB”

He has a point. When Palin quit her job some of us were quite happy. (Clearly, we didn’t realize at the time that her replacement would be worse.) Some people had stuck with her through the insanity that was the 2008 campaign and the disaster that was the legislative session of 2009.

Palin shot back, “Margaret Thatcher used to say, ‘I always cheer up immensely if an attack is particularly wounding because I think, well, if they attack one personally, it means they have not a single political argument left.’ So, thank you, Mark Begich, for making me and others exceptionally cheery today! Mark, after looking at your voting record I can see why you are looking for a distraction.”

It’s amazing she’s quoting Prime Minister Thatcher. When she was running for vice president it had to be explained to her that the Queen of England didn’t run Britain. Steve Schmidt had to explain to her the democratically elected Gordon Brown was the one to talk to about a hypothetical withdrawal of troops from Iraq.

My dear Alaskans, these exchanges are national news stories. Are you ready for this? Am I the only one who longs for the days when people would ask about dog sleds and igloos instead of “Oh, you’re from Alaska? You know Sarah Palin?”

I think Palin is serious about a Senate run. If life were fair, she would take on John McCain in an Arizona primary. Wherever she runs, her delusions of leading the Tea Party out of the wilderness are strong. After all, how are you going to position yourself to run against Hillary without a Senate seat?

 

[This article is cross-posted at The Anchorage Daily News]

 

Comments

comments

Comments
43 Responses to “Palin for Senate? Buckle up, Alaska.”
  1. fishingmamma says:

    She will run. Because running is a job that has a really big income — (donations) So she will ‘run’

  2. sierraseven says:

    Tangentially: Michael Cummings today pled guilty to stalking Bristol, and received a fairly lenient sentence … time served, a reduced fine, apparently in return for his stated intent to return to Texas and never darken the doorway of Miss Bristol again.

    In person, Mr. Cummings is a very soft-spoken, hesitant, unthreatening person.

  3. OMG says:

    Uh oh…the right wing Constitution party does not want Sarah:

    In sum, while we sympathize with the disagreements Governor Palin has with the elitists who control the Republican Party, her candidacy would not have our support. The Constitution Party is the only party that uses the Constitution as a yardstick to measure candidates and their platforms. In our opinion, Governor Palin is not a constitutionalist because of her stands on a number of domestic issues and foreign policy concerns. If she leaves the GOP, the Constitution Party is not an option for her political ambitions.http://www.highlandnews.net/articles/2013/07/15/opinion/columns/doc51e43b63bf518167386225.txt

  4. slipstream says:

    I wrote a campaign slogan for Palin. Perfect for a bumper sticker or yard sign:

    “Palin — a quitter you can count on”

    No charge for my creative work.

  5. Pete says:

    Palin is running…her mouth!! This is yet another desperate attempt by the grifter to fleece her flock of sheep. She’s simply soliciting donations for SarahPac! Her tweets link back to her Facebook page and SarahPac website.

  6. Zyxomma says:

    I will never forgive John McCain. Giving that POS a national stage (along with Koch Bros. money, ALEC, etc.) has lowered the level of the national political discourse to what couldn’t have passed muster in a junior high school debate team back in my school days.

    I blame McCain for ALL the bozos in the Senate and Congress nationwide (Louie-louie Gohmert, Carnival Cruz, Rand Paul, et al., ad nauseum). No, it’s not ENTIRELY his fault, but he showed just how unqualified a “candidate” could be, and severely bruised our republic. I just hope the injury isn’t permanent.

    GOTV in 2014!!!!!!!!

    • thatcrowwoman says:

      Thumbs up, Zyxomma.
      GOTV in 2014!!!!!!!!
      and I approve every one of these exclamation points, also, too.
      tcw

    • Moles says:

      A popular bumper bar sticker reads “Don’t vote, it only encourages them”. I can’t agree. If you don’t vote don’t complain about the rubbish that gets elected, the damage they can do is quite frightening.

    • Moles says:

      Quite agree. He should be locked in a room with Palin for a month, then the men with butterfly nets can come and collect him.

  7. OMG says:

    With a little help from all of us, this could be the real end to Sarah Palin. The field already has two contestants but Palin has in effect dismissed them. She says she’s waiting to see the new blood but none may come. In essence, according to her, her “servants heart” will force her to run if no one else steps up. If she doesn’t run it must be pointed out that she once again lied and fleeced her followers (just like she did during her presidential tease and family bus tour vacation). If she runs, the good people of Alaska must make sure she loses and loses big. She then must face the national humiliation of losing in her home state proving once and for the people who know her best like her least. Then finally, even if she runs and by some divine intervention wins, she’ll have to work and that means she’ll need to work daily. No more five minute segments on Fox to pay the bills. The woman will be watched and monitored like never before. Anyone inside the capital will have access to her…no more celebrity perks and protections. She won’t be able to handle six years of it. She’ll be toast and will likely quit when the fun of that kind of fame wears thin.

    • aussiebluesky says:

      She won’t run, she’ll endorse the nearest candidate with a pulse. She can already claim either Miller or Treadwell as her own and because there is money to be made through merely running (look at Lazy Miller, he hasn’t had a job in years) there should be at least one more loser candidate looking for some easy money. Bristol? Todd? Willow?

  8. Don't Retreat - Reload... says:

    How is that Ritcher Investment going? same management as Western United Life Assurance Company?
    What was that policy all about again…your take of the pie was? Now both businesses dissolved?
    How is that BP stock doing? So giving that TransCanada that 500 million transferred to to what account now? Notified the Birthright Owner of that HUGE trust fund? No?
    Well I hear that girl from Pakistan spoke at the UN and the Owner is slated next…
    Run Sarah Run…see Sarah Run to…lol…might join Edward Snowden…in Russia…in limbo…
    Story of Palins pathetic life hu folks? Sarah fought the law and the law won!!!
    Think Sarah will look good in Pink and get an outdoor room with “roomates” to advise of them of their rights…;)

  9. benlomond2 says:

    What was that phrase ?? oh yeah……… Bring it on, Buttercup!

    • benlomond2 says:

      oooopps.. too many screens, sorry for the double entry !

      • Alaska Pi says:

        whatzername makes folks bleary eyed enough to lose track , doesn’t she? 😉
        trying to keep an eye on her gyrations is almost impossible.
        well, ‘cepting for the fact they all boil down to horsepunky…

        • benlomond2 says:

          I’m TRYING to stay focused on more important things, …work, school. family. eliminating gophers with the cat , watching rocks grow…. but sometimes I just can’t help watching that train wreck they call Alaskan Politics….it’s the best Reality Tv going !!

          • Alaska Pi says:

            now you know why I don’t have a TV!
            I’d rather watch rocks grow .
            They sorta do here you know.
            Glacial rebound dealie.
            Much more interesting than whatzername.
            Hope you are getting some garden time in the mix too .
            Best wishes to you and your lovely wife!

  10. benlomond2 says:

    What was that phrase ???… oh yeah……… “Bring it on, Butter cup !! “…..

  11. aussiebluesky says:

    I don’t think she’s running for anything. Remember her last run for office? It ended in Forbes Magazine whacking the Palin Cult for altering Wikipedia to accommodate Sarah’s word salad mistakes about Paul Revere’s ride.

    Please don’t tell me that you didn’t notice the unconventional ninja grassroots presidential campaign, the roadshow that drove up to New Hampshire to pee on Mitt Romney’s announcement but couldn’t make an announcement of its own because nobody except the media was interested in Sarah Palin in any way. In Sarah’s imagination the crowds demanding “Run, Sarah, run!” truly existed (and it would surprise no one if she still believed that) but they just never showed and Sarah’s exploratory tourbus presidential campaign was called off due to lack of interest (or bad weather or Piper had a temper tantrum or who cares).

    The People failed to mass in the streets for Sarah. I don’t think even she believes that Alaskans would be massing in the streets for her. I hear she rarely ventures into the streets herself these days.

    Coincidentally (yes, I believe in coincidences) I’ve been reading the old Mudflats posts from the VP announcement onward. All this talk about Sarah running for office reminded me of the belly laughs she provided last time around. I’m less than a month into the campaign and already exhausted and sensing Jeanne’s exhaustion.

    Run, Sarah, run!!

  12. Valley_Independent says:

    This is just another Palin ploy for cash. Only if Alaskan voters have the attention span of a gnat would she ever get elected to anything here now. But then – sadly – I sometimes think that’s the attention span Alaskan voters have.

  13. Loveconquered says:

    She certainly brought out all the liars in Alaska who showed they know how to pretend they know a person for attention or money. She can take it; she’s strong. But it’s sad to see innocent people who’ve been connected to her be lied about. It’s sad to see disgusting people in the states fabricate entire stories just about Alaska itself, and Wasilla. Dear Media, you’ve hurt many people in the Valley just by insinuating things about them and their town. It’s entertaining that the people who call Sarah malicious names are equally malicious themselves. smh

    • aussiebluesky says:

      Dear Kristy, everyone knows your’re confined to Rhode Island and haven’t ever been anywhere near Alaska or any of the Palins. Is that because of their restraining orders? Even the 200 nasty Facebook identities that you created to stalk Sunny Johnston haven’t been anywhere near Alaska. Is that because of more restraining orders? smh

  14. mike from iowa says:

    According to the L.A. Times,Palin’s bestest buddy ever-Greta Van Whatshername-may be pushed off Fake Noise lineup and may sign with CNN,and everybody in the Universe knows how Snookie just loves the LSM. Stay tuned to see if Palin eats crow-no offense to TCW.

    • thatcrowwoman says:

      No offense taken, mikey.
      I’m a tough old bird and when my feathers get ruffled…well, $arah can bite me.
      hahahahacawcawcaw!
      That’s as close to eating thiscrow as she’s liable to get.
      I’d be happy to see her goose cooked into a Heaping Helping of Humble Pie.
      Stay tuned to see if Palin eats THAT, eh?
      {{{{{mikey}}}}}

  15. MagpieBaconite says:

    She’s certainly a selfless person trying to wake up people to disasters coming from DC. But I believe even she knows an elected office is out of her grasp. She’s always been privately for the little guy and doesn’t broadcast all the little things she does out of generosity and kinship. (Though there aremany who’ve witnessed this naturally due to being in the right place, right time). She’s a gracious person, an accepting soul. This I have known for 30 years.

    Personally, I ask people, instead of continuing to hone your attack skills, and your libel skills, that cause you to fabricate weird stories simply because you have nothing to talk about, why not actually objectively read what she writes. Put aside the assumptions and read the words.

    I read and listen to President Obamas finely scripted words (thankfully he has a writer because HIS off the cuff garble is something only aliens could understand.

    In the end, Sarah’s words are common sense. She may not speak new concepts, but to me, that means she’s not out of left fiels. She doesn’t fabricate things. She doesn’t personally attack the President. She pays attention and calls out things happening in DC.

    And Shannyn, you’re too smart to believe the 08 election lies about her. Really now.

    • mike from iowa says:

      This April Fools Day? Why wasn’t I notified?

      • Alaska Pi says:

        mikey-
        this is real.
        sorry.
        or can be.
        some people rilly think this about whatzername.
        sigh.
        slip – excellent!

        • mike from iowa says:

          I wuz rilly scared my Mayan calendar was wrong,again. Slip handled this in an appropriate,grown-up and gentlemanly manner,something I am not capable/desirous of.

          • aussiebluesky says:

            It’s just the Palin stalker again. She clearly has no clue who Shannyn is. Or no clue, period.

          • Alaska Pi says:

            I know. mikey, totally disorienting, isn’t it?
            We got tons of practice here after the failed VP run and Slip is in the truly grownup league.
            I’m not.
            My town got flooded with Palin Pilgrims . The PPs were a pretty sorry bunch being totally besotted and I gave up ANY pretense of civility after a bit.Bleah.

            • benlomond2 says:

              There were PP’s in Juneau and you didn’t point them out !! ??? OOOOhhhhhhhh… I feel soooo deprived !! Dag Nab it!! I shall expect you to point them out next time I get there… I’ve never seen a traveling Clown act before ..

    • slipstream says:

      MagpieBaconite:

      Is this an example of Palin not personally attacking the President?

      “Remember no-drama Obama? If only. Now it’s all-drama Obama,” Palin said. “We don’t have leadership coming out of Washington. We have reality television. Except it’s really bad TV, and America tuned out a long time ago.” She also criticized Obama’s push for more control over gun sales.

      Or is this an example of Palin not personally attacking the President?

      “More background checks?” Palin said. “Dandy idea, Mr. President. Shoulda started with yours.”

      Or is this an example of Palin not personally attacking the President?

      “Why the lies? Why the cover up?” she wrote. “Why the dissembling about the cause of the murder of our ambassador on the anniversary of the worst terrorist attacks on American soil? We deserve answers to this. President Obama’s shuck and jive shtick with these Benghazi lies must end.”

      I am reading her actual words, objectively, and it sure looks to me like she is personally attacking the President.

      Please explain how the Palin remarks I quoted could possibly be anything other than personal attacks against the President.

      • benlomond2 says:

        Slip… you left out ” The VP runs the Senate”… I’m sure Harry Reid would be glad to hand things over to Joe Biden at this point in time …

  16. laurainnocal says:

    Oops, sorry! Just realized Shannon posted this piece. Still holds, wouldn’t have gotten to know you all otherwise!

  17. laurainnocal says:

    It is true, I would never have come to your site Jeanne were it not for McCain’s big fat screw up. And for that I am grateful! I do agree with the gent from the other day who said she’s most likely about to promote another book. Even Palin can’t be that delusional.

  18. Conscious at last says:

    Do you truly believe that SP is serious about a Senate run? You were one of the folks who helped us to understand what a fraud she is. I don’t believe she is serious – she obviously just wants to squeeze some more money out of her supporters. She is neither desirous nor capable of running for the Senate. Grifting (&more) is her game. I think you Alaskans know this better than anyone else.

  19. mike from iowa says:

    Christmas in July-Hallmark telly channels are running Christmas movies all month,yuck. Alaskans should be able to muzzle Palin and I submit the quaility of word salad will neither improve or get noticeably worse. My preference would be to shove a log in her mouth sideways and use leather dog traces on either end to secure the log behind her head. But that is just me. On a personal note,I read every one of your articles,even if I have to look in the archives to find them. May not always agree,sometimes you aren’t nasty enough to suit me. With your personal experiences with what passes as the opposite sex,you are extremely credible and valuable source of information on women’s issues.You are very good at what you do,please keep doing it.