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Tuesday, December 28, 2021

Send Cruz & Co. to North Slope

As we trip along our merry way through the government shut down, and straight toward the Cliffs of Default, the mighty Matt Taibbi has penned his thoughts on the political landscape for Rolling Stone. Having lived in the former Soviet Union for ten years, Taibbi finds himself musing, “What Would Stalin Do?” about the pack of representatives who seem to have come straight from the back of the school bus, to the back bench of Congress. I’m guessing he would have taken Tea Party Sen. Ted Cruz’s caucus members, loaded them onto cattle cars, and relocated them to a piece…

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The Tea Party’s Favorite Painter

Have you ever flipped through cable channels while impaired, lingering on some freakishly weird Lawrence Welk Show dance moves for a few seconds of guilty pleasure? Looking at the works of right-wing Utah painter Jon McNaughton is kind of like that. If you haven’t exposed yourself to the visual splendor of his überpatriotic art, you’re so missing out. Stylistically, McNaughton cranks out the kind of representational schlock a Days Inn manager circa 1975 would have been too embarrassed to hang in one of his guest rooms. He makes Thomas Kinkade look like Damien Hirst. During his studies at Brigham Young University, McNaughton…

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Condescension from the Daft

                    Jon Stewart once said of President George W. Bush that “it’s not that he’s stupid, it’s that he talks to us like we’re stupid.” We have our own kindergarten dialect in the Alaska State Senate. During her last campaign, in a newly drawn district, Sen. Cathy Giessel used a Chamber of Commerce forum in Seward to greet her new constituents by showing the locals a map of their area—pointing out to them where they are, and what towns one passes en route to Anchorage. (Whoa, slow down, Senator! Even though…

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Mayor Dan Sez, “Let’s Get Started!”

The world is going to Hell. And there’s not a damn thing we can do about it. But, do you know what we can do? We can mock bad campaign literature, that’s what. And at least it will make us feel like we’ve done something. I anticipate doing a lot of this during the next year, because many candidates have Print Shoppe Deluxe™ on their e-machines. And some of them even have the 16-CD set of “1,000,000,001 Clip Art Images You Can Use.” It’s still early, but let’s trot out our first example before the class. You’ll be glad to…

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UPDATE: Whose Tardis is This? Doctor Who’s Tardis found in Alaska

I just received an Update on the origins of the Tardis in Homer. It is not stolen from Gallifrey as early reports originally implied. It was created by the Wolfe’s (Bad Wolf(e)? Rose Tyler might want to watch out…) From Nina: My daughter Rosemary Wolfe and the rest of the family are huge Doctor Who fans. We run the sod farm to the west of the grove where the Tardis is located. She, mostly, built the Tardis but had to leave to return to school and so it needs a bit more touchup, however, I am looking for the sign for…

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12 Best of Schrödinger’s Cat

If there are two things the internet loves (that are safe for work), it’s memes, and cats. So, naturally today is a perfect storm of internet fabulousness – the birthday of Erwin Rudolf Josef Alexander Schrödinger. He was an Austrian physicist, and over the course of his life developed a number of fundamental results in the field of quantum theory, which formed the basis of wave mechanics. But, to non-professional quantum theorists, he is best known for his “cat” … or his ex-cat. We’re not quite sure. Schrödinger’s catis a thought experiment, sometimes described as a paradox, devised by Austrian…

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Domino’s Apologizes to Alaska – Is it Enough?

BREAKING: The War on Halibut is heating up. Domino’s Pizza has sent an apology for offense to the state of Alaska, and the fishing industry as a whole over their new “Powered by Pizza” ad campaign that disparages Alaska’s beloved halibut. The furor in Alaska began whenThe Mudflats weighed in (HERE) after seeing the Domino’s TV commercial which claims “no one ever had a world-changing idea over halibut. No way,” as an actor spits halibut out of his mouth and on to the plate in disgust. Alaskans across the board were angered by the slight to our tasty and beloved…

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Domino’s Pizza Trashes Alaska Seafood

Why do you hate Alaska, Domino’s pizza? The new “Powered by Pizza” ad campaign for Domino’s Pizza asserts that good ideas and American innovation begin over pizza. It’s the food of brainstorming sessions, cutting-edge garage bands, and geeky future startup pioneers. Domino’s isn’t really my thing, but it’s a clever, upbeat sort of ad—something a little different, and inoffensive. Or so I thought.  They seem to have taken a cue from our former half-term governor who isn’t content to simply promote her own ideas, but must also create a fictitious “evildoer” to knock down in the process. And we, on…

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French Ninja Cats! Mon Dieu!

There are few things that bring people together these days, but ‘cats on the internet’ is the universal language. Even if it’s french. Call them “freedom cats” if you must, but these ninja masters cross the cultural divide. Pour yourself a glass of overpriced bordeaux, smear some Nutella on a baguette, and enjoy “Les Chats Ninjas!” Sacré bleu!

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Disney Queen Owns it.

It’s Wednesday, AKA Hump Day. Your work week is half way over. It’s probably when you’re already starting to peter out a bit in productivity levels, day-dreaming about that trip down to Homer, the Governor’s Picnic…or wherever. But for now, you have two days of work left. Here’s some inspiration from someone who takes pride in her job (however evil). The Queen from Snow White at Disneyland is asked a simple question by a little girl, “Why are you still jealous of Snow White?” hat tip to reddit.

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